content: Another repost of mine from the old forum: "idea for a movie: it's like the movie 'Get Out', but it's called 'Get In'..." A man named jamal is driving down a rural country road at full speed when he sees red and blue lights in his rear view mirror. a cop car is behind him.  jamal: awwww sheeeeeeeeeet. jamal tries to swerve around, to lose it, but loses control and almost ends ends up in a ditch.  jamal: mo fucka! jamal is frustrated. he thinks hard. then a lightbulb appears above his head. jamal has an idea... he pulls over.  the cop car pulls over behind him.  a cop gets out and waddles over to jamal's car window cop 1: now son, if you can just sit tight i'd like to ask if you know how fast you were goin in this here school zone, and right after schools out no less. jamal: yo... i'ma show you somethin. ahahhahaaAAAAAAAAAA jamal reaches over to his glove box, opens it, and digs through. cop 1: now i hope ya don't mind me askin, it may not be any a ma business, but what ya have in mind? jamal: thissssssssssssss cop 1: that's a real nice firearm ya got there, but is it posible that i could maybe see yer licence and registration? jamal: ay yo hol up, i need to take da safety off. heheheaaah. cop 1: now hold on there son, why ya gotta go and do a thing like that fer? jamal: yo'll seeeeeeeee hahahAAAAA! cop 1: well i suppose i could just take ya on yer word... jamal: aw sheeeeeeeet. ah ain' got no bullets in dis motha fucka. yo hol up. yo lemme put a HO   buncha caps in this shit, so ican blow yo ass outta hea! cop 1: hehe. that's a good joke pal. its nice to see that. ya know, we down at the station feel that police officers are meant to be like a friend, for everyone! It's always nice to hear when people feel comfortable around us, as just 'one o the guys', ya know?  jamal: ayo watch dis. jamal shoots the cop's tire.  cop 1: oooo, ya got ma wheel! ya musta known i had a spare in the back! :-) jamal: yo nah thas gon be yo face bich hahahAAAAA cop 1: hehe! that is a good one! :-)  jamal now reaches his gun an inch from the cops nose as the cop continues to smile.  but just then, the cop's partner hears something on his radio.  cop 2: hey sherriff, we're gettin a call from Mrs. Miller. her dog ran off and she can't seem to find it anywhere.  cop 1: aw shoot. i'm sorry i gotta leave you son, i just want you to remember that there school zone, thank you kindly.  jamal tries to shoot the cop as he waddles away but he's too much of a moving target, so jamal misses each time.  pow pow pow jamal: yo hol still ima bust you up! pow pow pow cop waves friendly-like as they drive away jamal: sheeeeeet jamal continues driving again and passes a sign saying "Welcome to Simpletown Valley" Meanwhile, in the town... a gay guy is walking down a sidewalk as some christians follow him around, pleading with him to consider going to their church.  pastor jim: we promise we can be completely accomidating to the way god made you!  helen: jesus accepts all people into his house, no matter what!  gay guy: ew. WHATeverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Ned gets on his knees in front of gay guy.  Ned: just think about how much you'd enjoy hanging out with some of the MALE congregation, like little johnny here...  gay guy: ugh, too old for me hahah. >;-) helen: you wouldn't even have to listen to the sermon, maybe you could teach a sunday school class instead! gay guy: ooh, that sounds hawt. pastor jim: we can even have ned help teach if you want. gay guy: no i won't need help. i know what the little boys want hahah >;-) Ned: :-D so you'll come to church?! promise?!  gay guy: i promise i'll THINK about it... pastor jim: really?! :-D gay guy: maaaaybeeeee... just then, jamal drives his car by this group of christians. he keeps driving, until he sees a young teenage girl among them.  so he stops the car, steps out and runs over. jamal tries to grab the girl's ass, but a pastor reaches his hand in and shakes jamal's. pastor jim: well howdy there! you aren't from around here are you? ..oh wait, i'm so sorry. what i meant was i've never seen you before. i wasn't judging your appearance! i hope you forgive me if i gave off that impression. jamal: ayo leggo, lemme grab this bish, imma make her ma ho.  pastor jim: now I'm not sure I understand completely. are you saying you want to MARRY my daughter suzie here? :-) helen: that's wonderful! ned: how about that! jamal: NAW BICH, i jus wanna fuck n suck does titties and bust it, all up in dat pussy.  pastor jim: and you will! right after you accept christ into your heart as your lord and savior... jamal: yee whatev. pastor jim: ..and then make a holy covenant with god affirming your union of love with this young lady! jamal: da fug? suzie: you mean i'm going to have sex now?! :-) (suzie stops holding hands with johnny) pastor jim: that's right honey, once you marry this fine young man of god here. jamal: thas rayscis, gimme dat pussy ass right now right heeeah.  helen: he's right, pastor jim. we're being very culturally insensitive toward him to demand that he wait so long. that may not be how they do it where he's from. maybe we can do the wedding sooner, like next week. jamal: rayscis. helen: or even sooner than that? pastor jim: i suppose i clear my schedule tomorrow, i was going to preach the word of god to the homeless vagrants by the overpass, but i suppose i could squeeze in a quick holy union for god to bless a long and happy marriage.  jamal (while breaking windows with rocks): RAYSIIIIIIIIIIIIISS. ned: hmmmm. pastor jim, maybe we could just drive to the church now. pastor jim: well, i suppose it wouldn't be too much trouble for something so important as creating a new family to serve god and work for his glory. jamal: heell yeah. then i can bust a nut all in dis white bish wit my dick all up dat ass, nigga.  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