So sorry that churches who follow religion have harmed you in some way. I do not deny that this occurs far too often. However there are some that exist, that understand it is about relationship. Jesus was always with people, with His "fellowship", etc, although He did take time away for face time with His Father. "Church" is not easy, it is the tough road of treading it with others, all of us with foibles. The fellowship i am with does accept me as i am, but also encourages me to grow to become more like Christ, to be salt and light in a dark world. It can be so easy to be alone, it is not easy to have to deal with people. In all honesty i would rather not-my flesh would rather go it alone, but the Spirit helps me. Fellowship has its challenges and rewards. Returning to what the New Testament/Book of Acts was all about, it is to strive for unity, to be in one accord. Even the devil will "go to church" to sow discord and foment hurt and harm. That is where much of the battle is. So...i go towards the battle. And i am not alone.... The Word (Christ/Scripture), Prayer, Fellowship. All these elements are needed to mature as a believer. Not easy, but so rewarding. As i like to say as a half joke but all truth-my fellowship puts up with me! So grateful. Godspeed!