Shitlording at Ross Hi fph.  My old account, 1SlayerOfEatbeasts quit working for some reason, so I hastily made another so I could share this with you: Me: 5'4' 115 blonde shitlady in a croptop and cutoff shorts 'cause it's sweltering hot. I was at Ross ( American discount clothing and home store) to find some new slacks for work, because I got a sweet new job. The store was full of smallfats, a few massive hamplanets, and many poor little future buttergolems in the making (poor kids). I was waiting in line for the dressing room to try on a bunch of pants, (because since vanity sizing has gone crazy I can never tell what size will fit) and this bright red-haired, pig-nosed tubblerina ahead of me is arguing with store clerk about only being allowed to take 8 items into the dressing room with her.  I have exactly 8 items, and I dart in to ask the poor clerk if I can just go ahead into the dressing room.  The clerk nods, fat-ass red-headed sofa bison glares angrily at me and snorts it's displeasure, then resumes berating the clerk.  Fast forward: I have my two pairs of pants that fit, (size 2 and a size 4) and I head for the checkout.  The line is massive. I simply accept that i will have to wait in line for a while, unfortunately surrounded by sweaty, smelly hams... What do I see? Red-headded she-behemoth is in line with its planet friends and they are just ahead of me.  It's massive, fat rolls spilling out of it's t-shirt that is at least 2 sizes too small, arm flab, back rolls, the whole nine yards- literally, it could have been mistaken for a fat high school football player instead of a 'reel womyn' or whatever.  It and its friends are chatting loudly, looking at all the beetus-offerings (Ross puts rows of 'specialty' beetus foods- candies, chips, popcorn, cookies ect.-- on the shelves that border the checkout lines for just this reason, so that fat hams stuck in line will buy it.)  So, tubblerina and its friends take the bait, start discussing which large bag of candy they want.  Red-headded she-behemoth turns half way around, spies me in line behind her and glares at me. Just then, one of its friends shouts 'OMG, look you guyz! Gummi worms! Let's get these guyz.'  I smile at that and red-haired hambeast saw me.  It moved away, then picked up another package- "No, let's get these" it says smugly.  it's holding a giant bag of-- I kid you not shitlords-- "Skinny Cow" brand chocolate caramel truffles. Its friends squeal, "Ohh- they're healthy, but the bags too small, let's get two!" I cannot help myself at this point.  I begin to laugh, because the ironly cracks me up so much I don't care who knows it.  People in line stare, first at me, then at the herd of eatbeasts who are indignant, but trying to act like they don't notice.  I kept laughing, louder. One of the few normal sized, and fit human beings in line behind me, a lovely gentlemen who looks like he works out regularly, smiled too and tried not to laugh.  Our eyes met, we connected in shitlorddom.  The hambeasts are getting increasingly annoyed, but red-haired Sasquatch is till holding the bag of "Skinny Cow" candy.  Unknown shitlord and I burst out laughing again.  Tubber-beast is massively triggered by this point, it's face is almost as red as its hair, and it opens it's mouth to 'reee!' but before it can say anything the check-out clerk called 'next!' and  had to mooove along.  I went through a different checkout  clerk, far away from the red-headed hogbeast.  When I left with my purchases, I saw Hogbeast and it's friends waddling into "Dickies BBQ pit" from the parking lot.  The irony never ends...