How much you wanna bet that kids father is some guy that drank himself into oblivion (or used other substances) and passed out in the VIP lounge?  "But... butt.... he was lookin' at muh curves all night!! He wanted dis! It's not rape if he never said no!" "Mam.. his BAC was .24 and he was shooting up speedballs in the bathroom. He has been deprived of oxygen for quite some time. He couldn't breathe let alone say yes or no." "Its xer to you, you ablest cis white scum! Learn muh pronouns! This is discriminashun!! om nom nom HE WANTED MUH BODAYY.. -slurping noise-" "Did you just pull food out of your diaper?!" "This is a G-string you fatist asshole! They dun't make no lingerie for womyn with curves this dangerous! The patriarchy tries to oppress real womyn with curves, so I had to improvise." "Now I know why it looks familiar! I got the same hammock from Home Depot. Only mine is white" "This was white when I got it, now stop opressin' muh & let me get back to muh man" "We're gonna need backup and a tranquilizer for this one." "Another fat feminist situation again?!" "Yepp, 10 four."