I shamed a fat into dieting by existing I have been in America for a week and I'm back to all you beautiful people. This is a story about my first ever experience with flying international. My brain is still a long way from normal so forgive me. I'm calling her Plane Fat because she was plain fat.  In 6 flights, I only encountered 1 personal space thief, thankfully. I had my clipboard ready, but being in the middle seat is going to suck. As Plane Fat got there and wiggled into the seat, I had a quick glace around trying to look at anything that wasn't this thing. This only took a second or so, but when my eyes came back to straight ahead, I saw my neighbour was now holding a brownie. Keep in mind this was about 6am. I still don't know where it came from or how it appeared so quickly. It's like it materialised out of thin air. Got to keep those sugahs up for all that sitting, I suppose. With Plane Fat's strength returned, the armrest immediately went up and then the armrest immediately went down again. It might be important to note that I didn't utter a single word to it the entire flight. Talking to it would be beneath me. It didn't mind, though. It turned to me and said, "I hope no one sits in the window seat because then you can move over. Tee-hee." It actually did tee-hee. My eye twitched so hard the plane shook. My tortured eyes were given no respite. At this point, Plane Fat stood up in its seat to rearrange its underwear. I'm not kidding. It didn't move out into the aisle or anything, so inches from my face, a large, lumpy arse had its fupa holster moved around. I could hear it! Thank fuck I couldn't smell it! I can't even begin to imagine how this is acceptable. It did help my book become incredibly interesting, as least.  Moving on to the important part, food was eventually served. As a surprise to no one, Plane Fat eagerly took her box of I forget what it was. I didn't because I have mastered the art of surviving 2 hours without food. The strange part is that it didn't eat a thing, not a single bite. You can imagine my confusion. It opened the box and inspected its prey in the time it took for me to say I won't be needing a meal, and then it left it there untouched. Later, when the attendants came to collect the rubbish, Plane Fat handed back the still full box of food and that was that. I can only conclude that it was so ashamed of being gluttonous and disgusting in front of someone so much better that a rational thought appeared in its fat addled brain. I don't know what else could have happened. Fats aren't exactly picky when it comes to jamming stuff in. I call that one a win.