'I need the exercise!' referring to going up and down 1 flight of stairs. Grabs and jiggles giant belly... FUCKING BARF Ok, fine iDGAF what you do. You're trying to tell me that logic has nothing to do with how you think, so go ahead and break up the usual work routine. Hey, btw, exercise has nothing to do with your problem.... Its actually as simple as cutting out simple carbs like sugar and flour.' 'Teehee!' Pulls hershey bar out of purse. I repeated myself 5 more times, and I just KNOW that my advice went right through that broken sieve of a brain. Yup! First break, comes back with a bag of microwave 'super butter' popcorn. 'Is this bad for me?' UnFUCKING BELIEVABLE! 'YES! Go look up the ingredients! Microwave popcorn is one of the worst things you can put in your body!' Literally proceeds to not look anything up, but also make ridiculous throat clearing sputtering sounds because kernel skins are getting stuck in its throat as it snarfs down the latest fix. Fucking.... WHY EVEN ASK?! In conclusion, fats are utterly disgusting, incompetent, delusional, self-loathing, know-nothing, useless, slothful, ignorant, oblivious, illogical, egotistical, pointless sacks of human waste who only serve to detract any real value from EVERYTHING in the NEAR VICINITY of their diseased, putrescent, tepid, adiposed, immuno-supressed, inferior blubber barges!