Even if I didn't think lard barges were utterly repulsive, I still wouldn't want to be with one, because... I wouldn't want to have to pay for all the hog feed a hungry hippo could eat. They must be spending $20-30 per meal. It might be the more economical thing to just eat a buffet all the time, but that'd still be about $15 per person when you know the soda slurping slob is going to order a drink instead of water. After seeing you two at the Chinese buffet too much, Mr. Chang would be like, "You no come back. You no come back. You too much eat." I guess we'd be eating at the Golden Corral everyday and maybe a pizza buffet. I'm pretty sure $15 is a day's worth of food for me if I don't eat out anywhere.