Latest excuse by the ham Andre He went to the snack machine three hours after lunch. Because he said earlier he does not really care so much about food, entire office started making fun of him. I said I would like to take keys to the machine and replace contents with celery, carrots and broccoli imagining the panic of people who huff to it.  Andre: "i would like that, I really like... what it is called?"  "Apple?" quipped Sue.  Andre: "No celery chips." Andre later claimed he eats more vegetables than the rest of us combined. "Yes, but not percentage-wise." But what floored me was the excuse: "If I go hungry, I am tired in the evening and can't read on the train back home. Better fat than illiterate."