Failed shitlording my brother I am trying so hard to shitlord my brother and shame him into action, and it's not working. He used to run cross country and be super-fit, and then he injured his knee, discovered the beer-and-pizza college diet, and just gave up on life. He's slowly ballooning and will reach obeast status. So I remind him of how good he felt when he was running. "Can't run, my knee." Okay, try bike riding. "Nope, still hurts. Need surgery." Fine, get the fucking surgery. "No can do. I'll be out of work." Dumbass, you live at home with mom and dad. "Still can't." How about yoga? "Too expensive." Yoga on YouTube? "Nah, not motivated." Go to the gym with Dad? (Who walks the mile-plus there, does free weights for an hour, walks back.) "Eh." Eat healthier? Cut back on the beer? "Too hard. I work weird hours." Fine, so I start in on how happy I am now that I run and lift. "Eh. I feel myself getting fatter, but I can't do anything about it." I predict that in one year he's going to be a full-fledged landwhale.