My sister, an adipose monster, wants my help to lose weight...but we've been down this road before UPDATE I took the input from you guys and decided not to send my original response. This is what I sent her instead: I thought about it a lot and talked with friends about it and it hurts to write this but here it is. I can't help you. The truth is that you are the only one who can help you. You know what to do and if you're serious about wanting to get healthy then you'll do it no matter what. I can't do it for you. Everything I told you in the past is still true. Just do that. If you commit to a healthy life I know you can succeed. We are the same blood! The biggest difference between us is you use our childhood as an excuse to cause yourself even more destruction and I use it as an excuse to cause myself to sweat, feel strong and powerful, and be happy. When you lose 200 pounds, call me. We'll workout together. Until then I can't do anything more for you. >   I got an e-mail from my blob of a sister last night with the subject "plz help me". I've been debating with myself all day what to do about it and finally came up with a response.  Her e-mail read as genuine, but we've been down this road before. She's asked for help before. I've offered help without her asking before. She ALWAYS quits. That and she's been completely hateful to me for most of the past 20 years. She really did make me hate her, and not in the "yeah I hate all fat people" kinda way, but the "this is my sister, mi familia, I really want to love her but she's made it impossible" kinda way. Family means a lot to me though so when I read her e-mail I got the instant urge to want to help her. That was last night, and I fought the urge to want to help and decided to sleep on it and think about it today. Before sending her my response though I thought I'd post it here for your input. My goal was to have my response be something to try and make sure she's actually serious this time. I also designed it to be triggering, partially in hope that the response alone will just make her give up right now. I know that sounds horrible, but I know trying to help her lose weight will be a massive undertaking and I have very little spare time. Here's my response. Let me know what you think. It's a Word document I'll be attaching to an e-mail to her. I hope it pastes okay here... I was pleased to get your e-mail and I’m really happy you have decided to work on fixing your life. No matter what I want you to succeed with this and have a good and long life. If you’re serious about wanting this and wanting my help to do it then I’ll help you. I can’t be sure you’re serious though, especially given your past and especially because of the way you have treated me and our relationship. As much as I would love to help you I can’t afford to waste my time. I have very little of it, as you know. I want to believe your desire and request are genuine and that maybe by the end of whatever is about to happen I’ll have a sister I can enjoy being around and going out and doing fun things with, but I’m not just going to immediately offer my help this time. I need to know you’re serious. To prove you’re serious please complete this application and bring it back to me in person at my home. This is how it has to be. I hope you understand.  PART 1: Essay (write at least 500 words in response to each question; use your own paper) PART 2: Proof of Intent (complete each of the following steps and bring evidence of completion when you come over) PART 3: Essay (write at least 750 words in response to the following) After you have everything done call me and we'll set a time for you to come over.  In my mind everything on my application should be beyond easy and if she's truly genuine about her desire to lose weight then she'll have no problem doing this. What I really want to see from her though is not just the desire to lose weight. I want her essay response to be about wanting to get healthy (as healthy as she can at this point given the damage already done). I want her to commit to living a healthy life. And I don't want to read any excuses. We had the same abusive bastard of a father & uncle and experienced the same shitty early-life experiences. All of her excuses tend to go back to that. Anyway, as much as I want to have a human sister to do human stuff with I'm willing to put money on her never even responding to this.  Have any of you ever helped a family member lose weight and get healthy and have them actually succeed?