I actually got into this in another part of the thread. It is a good point. The distinction I made was that shame over being fat could be said to be different from internalised hate. I think, in a vacuum, that you would not feel ashamed of your sexuality, but that you would over being fat. The latter is, of course, a choice and makes you feel bad even without external influences whereas the former is and does not. Granted, there is a lot of grey area there and room for debate. I definitely understand where you are coming from.