OP's line stood out to me:  I live in a semi-fit part of the country so it's a shock to see so many huge fats together in one space.  It's like BDSM meetups (ask /r/KinkyShitlords).  Even in low-BMI cities you somehow manage to get all morbidly obese people.  And it's not even the case that fucking the hams will give you a "good reputation" and thereby access to someone attractive.  That's just fiction from /r/BDSMcommunity.  On another note, if you ever need a Reed 1 player in the Waco/Houston/Austin general area, I'm dying to play again. And I won't take up 1.5 or even two seats. :)  I hope you saw that part, OP.