My time as a dolphin among whales or: How I learned to stop caring and love the obesity epidemic. I sell handmade things at trade shows dedicated to artisans. As such I spend all day dealing with some very special fucking snowflakes. At all of these shows there are usually two sections, the handmade goods portion and the greasy fried foods/baked butter section. You can probably already guess which section gets the most attention. These places are a strange mixture of vegan hippies/normal sized humans with respect for their well being and those that follow the ways of trans fats and butter fried butter. Sadly the latter outweighs (both literally and figuratively) the former. Every single day I have fat fucks dripping sauces on my table and goods, spilling their drinks (they love to set their food down on my table too, drives me fucking mad), knocking shit over and not picking it back up, breaking shit and worst of all stealing my stuff. Their behaviour at these shows would shock even those who work with autistic children that have FAS. They scream and cry and bitch and moan and generally make a scene whenever the wind fucking blows. They haggle (poorly) and act like I am a fucking walmart returns counter. They treat me like an "untouchable" and expect I will bend to their every whim. I never fucking do, sales be damned. I am sick and tired of these people balking at my prices. Prices that are already so low I am basically a slave to myself. Which whatever....I enjoy what I do and am (usually) pretty happy that I get to do this. However, as I get older I am starting to want things. For instance, a third and fourth pair of pants would be nice. Perhaps a few new t-shirts as well. One thing I have always wanted is a freaking car of my own. Now I have good credit and could easily get a loan for a car and possibly a few luxuries like an electric razor and new treads for my bike tires. Instead I have decided I will use my loan money to start up a food truck business.  Why a food truck business? Because a fat fuck will pay $10 for a "gourmet" hotdog that consists of a hotdog shoved into the middle of a hollowed out baguette. They will spend $15 on "authentic" Belgian waffles or my personal favorite $5 for a small bag of mini doughnuts that probably cost less than 20 cents to make. They balk at a $10 dollar bar of soap that weighs 200+ grams and lasts at least a month of everyday use (and are beautifully designed and are made of awesomeness)  but they willingly spend 12 bucks on a "taco in a bag" which consists of 1/2 lb of ground beef, 2 cups of sour cream, 1/8 of tsp of shredded lettuce mixed in a snack sized bag of doritos.  So I am saying Sayonara to the artisan soap game and Guten Tag to the deep fried dumpster drippings game! If 2/3 of North Americans are overweight and the obese outnumber the overweight (I may be wrong here but I swear I read somewhere that the obese now outnumber the overweight) then I would be an absolute fool to pass up this opportunity. I have a few ideas in my head of what I should focus on but I would love to hear some suggestions. I am tossing around the notion of maybe just focusing on healthy food since there are rarely any healthy options at these sorts of events but I have a feeling I would have a hard time competing with gourmet fucking hotdogs.  I realized I just wrote a fucking novel, if anyone else has any stories of hams pretending to give a shit about local and semi-local made goods just so they can shove more shit down their throats I would love to hear them!  edit: Holy wow! I did not expect this much of a response! Thank you fellow shitlords! A lot of great ideas and even more awesome commentary!