Comparing Calories: Hams Don't Know When to Stop Over the past year, I've started counting calories. It's an admittedly fun thing for me to do since it allows me to shitlord subtly and see just how much the hams eat. Yesterday was a perfect example of this.  A few of my friends and I decided to go to a late movie showing at 11pm. Henceforth they will be known as P, S and Lardass (the one who broke 3 chairs).  We had about an hour to kill so we decided to go to the convenience store near P's house so she could get gas and I could grab something to eat. Before this, my calorie intake for the day was around 750 since I ate some leftover Chinese food for breakfast and had a 12oz cappuccino for lunch. Shitty but filling. Fast forward to checkout, I decided to grab a sticky bun (360 cals) and a bottle of unsweetened tea (0 cals). I left Lardass in the store, finished my the honeybun in the car, and looked over to see her exit with a full bag and an icee in hand. This is what her bag consisted of:  A bag of teriyaki beef jerky, a sticky bun, an Arizona Ice Tea + the icee, which was a mix of multiple flavors and some coke to really bring home the Beetus. Ignoring the icee, that's about 780cals give or take. The icee I can only estimate but given the fact that a 32 oz blue icee is 420 and 1 cup of coke is 100, I'm going to guestimate that her sugary drink was around 500cals bringing her entire 'snack' to a whopping 1,280cals.  And it doesn't end there.  At the theater S and I bought a small popcorn to split between us, about 530cals. What did Lardass get you ask? A large coke and a large popcorn (2,144), all the while tee-heeing and cracking jokes. I noted that maybe she should downgrade to a small because we literally just ate not even an hour ago. Instead of being rational and not spending $20 on pure junk food, she just laughed in my face and said she couldn't see a movie without popcorn.  To conclude, my entire caloric intake for the day was 1,640. Her 'snacks' alone total 3,424. I was only with her for a fraction of the day so this does not include any meals she had prior to us meeting up. Admittedly, I overate but I personally can afford it since I'm not a ham and don't eat 3 days worth of food in two hours.