Except for vegetables, of course (and everyone knows the only way to serve vegetables is with ranch dressing and not any toppings that have a complex flavor, amirite?)  Examples of the above: Liking Golden Corral (the dessert's the only part that actually tastes good) Stealing food from coworkers Stealing food from roommates Eating mayonnaise straight from the container (there are a number   2d36  of photos of this specific example) Eating butter straight from the container Melting the aforementioned butter and mayonnaise together in the microwave to make "mayo soup," which is healthy because "I also use low-fat mayo." Drinking ketchup straight from the container Drinking ranch dressing straight from the container Drinking maple syrup straight from the container Drinking other condiments straight from the serving dish: "that's right, folks, a BOWLARAVY!" Eating a big block of cheese after gorging your way through a box of Cheez-Its (multiple examples again: not only did the fat woman with the backwards hat do it, Bowlaravy did it too. [Insert gross thing hams eat here.] For all the talk about pleasure and gluttony, hams don't seem to go for a small portion of something delicious as much as a large portion of something crappy.  They eat things that would never occur to a human.