Tales from Domino's 12: Phone Fatties Fucking Suck! Greetings fellow shitlords! RPBG reporting in! So I've been working at Domino's for a few months now, and as you've seen from my stories the clientele I deal with...less than ideal. Let me just say that you don't see the dark side of humanity unless you work in law emforcement, the military or in the food service business. And last night as I pulled the late night shift and man let me tell you(as the title says), phone fatties are the worst. So let me give a quick breakdown of how phone orders work at Domino's. We have several computers in the store: the main one in the back for the manager(s), two at the front counter and 4 on the side wall by the heating shelf. When you are taking an order, cancelling one or checking the status you type in your code(last 4 digits of your SSN) and then tap either ''Today's Orders'' or ''Quick Payment'' when an order is being checked out and paid for. For ordering itself, we have to tap a free line and then input name if it's carry out, an address when it's delivery and then going through the various icons for pizza, sides, desserts etc as well as inputting coupons. MAny people pay with card over the ohone so all the info we have to put in manually. With this in mind, having quite a few phone orders on a rush night is hell. We had the typcial wave after wave of pizzas and being stretched thin with like 6 people working inside. And what didn't help was that despite Domino's being a one stop shop for their beetusy goodness(pizza, cheesy bread, chocolate lava cakes, etc) fatties over the phone either a)Take HELLA long to order, b)Have shitty reception since some calls are extremely full of static and what not and c)prank calls and people trolling and d)fatties bitching at me for late deliveries even though I only work inside and doing the best I can and have no control over how many drivers we have, traffic conditions, and other factors which factor into delivery time. Now for some examples: -The other night when I picked up the phone, this lady, I shit you not, actually asked ''Do you guys have Little Caesar's number?'' I told her no, that this was Domino's, and then she (I shit you not again) asked ''So can I find it on Google?'' and then either I hung up or she did but man if hat wasn't a prank call my faith in humanity dropped 5%. -Awhile back during one of our more extreme overflows, I answered a phone that was on hold for awhile because we were so backed up. I answered and this guy was upset since his delivery was late and when I told him he had to go back on hold since there were several other calls and the managers were too busy, he got really mad and said ''This is ridiculous! I'm the customer, I pay your salary!'' XD Dude, I don't get a salary the managers do(not that I said that to him) -Last week, the phone rang from a number with the name ''Anonymous''. I answered and someone said something about sucking his girlfriend's dick and laughing was heard in the background. I hung up, smh. -On Friday, we were going through the typical beetus rush but it wasn't too bad since we had almost a dozen or so people in when I got there. So I'm on the phone with this lady who is complaining about a late delivery order and I put her on hold because I'm trying to see if one of the managers on duty could get to her since she asked to speak to management. When  I answered her again and said that the managers were too busy trying to keep things moving and afloat(which they were) she then said that was unacceptable and then asked for their names and when I told her, she said corporate was gonna hear about this, lol. Even my managers said corporate won't do shit since they actually know what goes on in the store. Also we are a store in California where I live and if Cali is known for anything other than the high as fuck cost of living and liberal capital of the union we have been suffering from wildfires up the wazoo. There was one near my area(not close enough for an evacuation, but enough that the weather for the past too days has been really cold since the sun has been blocked by the smoke.) Basically that affects traffic to some extent as I saw when me and my family were coming from another city 50+ miles away. -I nearly killed over laughing last night since his one lady wanted to order but carryout was closed and delivery time was 45 minutes. She couldn't wait 45 minutes apparently so she began asking if she could just drive to outside our store and we walk it out to her(or ''deliver'' it to her outside). It was just funny of how she was desperate for pizza at this late hour. I should also note that people also can't apparently look up coupons. Despite the commercials on TV and you know, access to the Internet being in the literal palm of everyone's hands, I constantly have to explain what the specials are(despite how popular they are) which takes up more time for their order, especially since many can't even figure out what they want. Oh and don't forget their shitty reception. Some of these phones are just so staticy. Not all of them are terrible though, some are regulars who order the same thing(such as this Indian family that regularly orders vegetarian pizzas) so they make things alot easier. Other than that, nothing too crazy though we have had the courtyard behind the store wrecked by homeless dumpster divers as the security guard showed me pictures of all the trash they left on the benches and ground. Then this homeless lady came in last night and just sat at one of our tables, kinda muttering gibberish and paced a bit. I honestly worried if perhaps she was on drugs and something like this was gonna happen but she eventually left. I work again this afternoon so if I'm lucky(and at the same time unlucky) I'll have more tails for you wonderful lords and ladies because this is what I go through for your entertainment.