Tonight I went to a concert and got sandwiched between two beetus balloons. It was an outdoor venue at night in a hot, humid part of the states. My friend got a cheap standing room ticket, but I was willing to pay to get close. I used the solo option to get up even closer. It was hot enough already without having to be between two 200+ pound behemoths. One of them looked like a middle aged, no-change lady that might have been human-sized when she was younger. The other was a sheboon balloon that has probably never thought that there's something seriously wrong with fried chicken and soda as a meal. I couldn't even sit in my seat without contacting one them on the sides. Then in front of me there's the tall fatty with a back of the head lard patch. What do you even call that?