Fat Fuck On A Bus I take the bus to work, and I know most of the people on my bus because it's the normal morning commute crowd.  Today there was a newcomer, a 350 lb land whale, sitting right on one of the benches taking up 3 seats (1.5 seats for each ass cheek).  In the morning before I've had my coffee I can be kind of direct so I just went up and said "Excuse me".  The land whale was like "I'm sitting here" and I told her that she was taking up several seats, could she please share.  The whale said "I NEED MY SPACE" and it began huffing and puffing like it was going to blow my house down.  So I told it to fuck itself then I farted in its area and found another seat. Also: fat fucks don't realize they're crowding you because that's just what life is like for them, 24 hours a day of no personal space because they can't fit in places normal people do.  So they don't see crowding you as a big deal, it's just how life is.  FUCK!