God I love my parents Last night, my mother called me to tell me she witnessed something funny. She was in a restaurant with my father and this fat fuck sat in a chair, but when it tried to get up her masive ass was stuck in the chair. It took 10 minutes to get her ass out of the poor chair.   My mother couldn't even tell the story straight without descending into mad laughter.  Which reminds me of my father. Whenever we're in the car and we have to stop at a crossing, he smiles at the fatass who needs to cross the road and says in a polite voice: "Today, you massive fat blob, don't hurry or otherwise you'll burn too many calories and we don't want that, do we?" Or the times we were at the beach and he got irritated as hell because 'all the fat women blot out the sun.'  Any shitlord parent stories?