Shitlord Instrument Every now and then, I like to play violin in the subway, because the acoustics are fantastic and it's fun to see how much pocket money I can earn. I'm pretty good, so I get lots of compliments and inquiries as to whether I'm available for projects (yesterday, I was asked to be part of some drag queen event. That's gonna be fun!) Anyhow, it occurred to me that the violin is a total shitlord instrument. How many obese violinists have you seen? You literally cannot have sausage fingers and hit the correct notes, and certainly not with any speed. Are there any other shitlord instruments out there? I was thinking the ukulele, but I think that really fat Hawaiian guy plays it. Mandolin, maybe?