"Jesus Christ Nick." I'm on travel and grabbed breakfast at the local hospital cafeteria.  It's the type where you grab what you want, show your container to the cashier, and they charge you based on what you took. The murse in front of me was a gigantic obeast with the largest type clamshell container.  It slid the container over, grinned sheepishly and opened the clamshell.  Here is the conversation that ensued. Cashier (skinny Asian lady): "Jesus Christ Nick.  That's too much!" Fatty: "I know", grinning stupidly and looking away, "I just couldn't resist." It's clamshell was loaded with bacon, sausage, cheese, and gravy, with a side container of grits. Cashier: "Nick your wife is gonna kill you, you just got back from heart surgery." Fatty, growing irritated: "Don't tell me what to eat.  I need this.  Today is super busy and I don't know if I will get lunch."  This was, of course, said in the most cloyingly immature and whiny way possible. Cashier looked at the fatty doubtfully while ringing it up, "You can't keep doing this Nick.  That stuff is bad for you." Fatty: "But I probably won't get anything else to eat today.  It's ok, I'm just making sure I don't get hungry." Mother fucking fats.