Fats at a Funeral My great uncle passed away this week. He was just a few months shy of 100, and had a long, fulfilling life. He was my grandpa's oldest brother, and my mom's favourite uncle, so even though I didn't know my great uncle that well, Mr. Ferret, Baby Ferret & I went with my parents and grandfather to the funeral today. Hams. Everywhere. I didn't know any of them, and they clearly weren't from our side of the family. They were all dressed like they were going to the beach... sandals, cotton sundresses mostly in white and black stripes, piles of flesh spilling out everywhere. One male eatbeast was wearing denim shorts and a striped purple golf shirt with what looked like a mustard stain on the collar. But the one that pissed me off the most was probably a few years younger than me (I'm 30), 5'3" ish and had to be pushing 300 pounds. This particular femayo was wearing a stretchy tube top dress that had a beige/white pattern on it, with a black bra underneath. Its bra straps were completely exposed, and the fabric on the dress was stretched so thin that you could see the black bra through it as well. And of course it was wearing sparkly flip flops, with its gnarly hooves exposed for everyone to see/smell. For contrast, I was wearing a black skirt suit with a burgundy blouse and matching black blazer, while both Mr. and Baby Ferret were wearing a full suit and tie. My 1-year-old baby was dressed more appropriately for this funeral than this adult butter huffer. (I was debating on taking a photo of the calorie hoarder, but opted not to because I didn't want to be disrespectful given the circumstances.) I met eyes with this beast once, just before they put the casket into the mausoleum. I gave it a very dirty look, and turned away before I could see if it had any sort of reaction. Oh, and my uncle's fatass wife who I've bitched about before? She thought it was appropriate to wear Birkenstocks to a funeral. Fucking fats have literally zero class or respect for anyone, not even the dearly departed.