Shitlady origin story(s) Let me tell you guys about pepperoni pizza legs. I'll call her ppl for short.   I used to work with her and we had a mutual friend so I befriended her.  The only reason I don't regret it at this time is because she was a lolcow and makes me feel better about myself... but when I was her friend it was stressful.   She was fucking crazy. She thought astrology (yes, the taurus pisces shit she made it clear she did not mean astronomy, science of stars and outer space stuff) should be considered science.   She claimed both her and her mother cannot wear watches because they have too much electricity flowing in their bodies. A coworker told her to prove it using a working watch, which he offered to provide. She gave every excuse in the book to not wear the watch.  That coworker and ppl and I were in a big friends group and we poked fun at each other often. She got absolutely T R I G G E R E D when we called her a normie. She claimed that her high school bullies called her that. That was a lie because she's 30 years old as of this year, and the term normie didn't exist 15 years ago. Turns out she thought we were calling her normal, and she wanted soooo badly to be quirky and weird and 'not like other girls' . But she was a typical fat sjw.   She had a crush on a guy (I don't know whether he really exists to this day?!) She had a friends with benefits relationship with. (See why I doubt his existence?) She seemed to not know a thing about sex but claimed she's done it. And then she tells us she's preggo. I feel retarded for believing her the first time... then she claimed she had a miscarriage. We were supportive and everything but secretly, me and the watch coworker were sharing our doubts. So we asked her what pill she was taking that failed to protect her from pregnancy, but she kept deflecting our simple ass questions. I finally cut ties with her when she went to my going away party (I had quit the job and was going to move far away) and made it all about her. She claimed she was pregnant AGAIN and went outside the restaurant. I went to check on her and she kept listing off symptoms of pregnancy you can find on webmd...  Ppl got into arguments often with watch coworker. It didn't matter what subject. Politics, food, science, didn't matter, her unironic comeback was "well I'm a goddess so I'm right"  She, ofcourse, claimed she was perfectly healthy and that you can be fat and healthy.  Watch coworker points out flaws in her argument and her response is "I'm a goddess"   In the break room ppl and watch coworker were having lunch with some other coworkers. Watch coworker says that he's tired of ppl's lies and she says, "name 5 lies I've told!" And his response was, "are you saying 5 because any less is too easy?) And cue the muted snickering from everyone else.  I have many many more stories about this particular ham but I'm gonna end with why I call her pepperoni pizza legs.   I went to the pool once with her. She's 5'3 and like 200 lbs, and most of the fat went to her stomach. She was pizza shaped lol   As for the pepperoni part, I saw her legs for the first time at the pool and she had giant red stretch marks down her thighs. Quite disturbing. I often teased watch coworker with the imagery hehe.  I'm not a good storyteller but if you guys want more stories let me know, this bitch was insane. Oh, and all the stereotypes about fat acceptance hams applied to ppl. Of course.