My pathetic, fatass roommate and a small bonus from work Following up on my pathetic, fatass roommate; So apparently rolls on rolls over there had last week and a couple extra days off. In Canada we had Family Day on Feb 15 so long story short the doublewide doubledown had a total of 10 days off. Guess what it did? Go ahead I'll wait. Eat? Yes you're correct. However, Capt Lard spent all 10 days upstairs, alone, in its room. It went out a whopping twice--once to see Deadpool alone and once more to go drinking since apparently thats the only activity he and his few friends do. I discovered it orders in any manner of takeout then stores all the food in its room as well as the boxes. So chicken wings sitting out for 3 days? No problem. It'll eat them. Repulsive, lazy, and too stupid to store its shit in the fridge.  I also took a dude home Saturday since his roommates are a burden. I texted Ol' Broad as a Barn asking if it was home and suggesting it go to sleep. It replied it was going to stay up all night playing The Division. Well tough shit for you, then I guess. We got in, it came out to greet us while my dude was in the washroom, and I told it to shut its door and go away because I was getting some D. Mr 5x5 hasn't spoken to me since. Well sorry I'm not disgusting and can pull a member of the opposite sex? Sorry we couldn't bother with his roommates this time so I brought him home?? I'm not explicitly complaining about it keeping out of my hair. Bonus level: I work at a large video game company. Yes, there are stories, but I can barely be arsed to type up shit about Blubber Gut do you think I can keep up with the antics of the shockingly few hogs in the studio? Not terribly. Moving on to the creature feature visiting the other TA on my project. So pus-gut over there has some magnificent fat crop top action happening. He's wearing jeans which are hanging low so you see the top band of his Walmart-brand boxers. But, thats simply not enough. He is also wearing a shirt that is about 2 inches too short. So we're witnessing a line of boxer, then another 1 inch strip of protruding, pale, flabby, hairy gunt. A-la a porky 14 year old girl in high school who's just discovering her sexuality. Truly a magnificent piece of performance art. He's also sputtering along speaking that guttural noise that is Quebec-French. As a woman from France, it fucking burns my ears terribly. Thank god I invested in $350 headphones on our last game when I was jammed next to your most stereotypical example of an oozing sack of shit programmer... which really was a goldmine of frustration and stories.