Hog Fight! Last night my shitlord boyfriend and I had just finished doing the nasty when we heard glass shatter outside in the parking lot of our apartment. Cars have been broken into before and so he threw shorts on and ran outside. He met up with another man in the parking lot and started looking for the shattered glass. On the third floor, a physical therapy boot came flying out of the window and landed near them. Two fat shit kids (11 and 16) ran out onto the patio and cried "They're fighting, their fighting!" So my boyfriend and Mike jog up the stairs, get the kids out of the apartment and look for the two people fighting. The 16 year old boy was a flaming fag. I love gay men, okay? But this kid had green hair, a lisp, a high pitched voice, and a Madonna shirt on. He was trying WAY too hard. I know drag queens that would tell him to tone it down. So he's on the phone with the police and I take the 11 year old into my apartment and sit him down. I asked if he was okay and if he wanted something to drink (like fuck I'd offer something to eat. He'd eat me out of house and home). He declined and so I started making small talk with him. He said he was 11 and in 4TH GRADE. I asked him why he wasn't in 6th and he said because he missed school so often that they failed him two years in a row. I asked how he missed so much school and he said his mother didn't feel like taking him often.  The police arrive and my boyfriend comes back to tell the kid that they want him home now. The second the door closed behind the kid I asked what happened in there. Guess this shit out. All four 'people' in there are ham beasts; the sons, the daughter and the mom. Each kid has a different dad, each a different race. The mom is 300+ and the daughter is 250+ with heavy make up, odd colored hair, everything we fucking hate. That pin-up look that make us want to fucking puke our low calorie lunches out. This is what happened. The daughter (24) got the only car they had towed for parking in a handicap zone (SHOCKER) and the mom was upset. Ok. Now the son has no way to get to school so they decided to attempt to walk to his elementary school to see how far it was. On the way, the mom broke her fucking foot. At the hospital the doctor tells her she wouldn't've broken it if she wasn't so over weight (I love this doctor) and tells her to go on a diet. The mom is even more pissed. So they get home from the hospital, an argument occurred and the mom fucking took her boot off and threw it at her fucking daughter, missed, and tossed it out the window. When my boyfriend and Mike got there, they were trying to smother one another with their own fat. I shit you not.