Ahoy! I spotted the largest landwhale I've seen in person today! I work for a very busy company, and by very busy I mean around 50k - 80k patrons in a day.  I've seen tons of whales in my time there, but today, oh man, today I saw the biggest I've ever seen.  This thing had a fupa almost to its knees, and it had spread to its backside as well. It was this short fat ugly little gremlin that I just wanted to go away.  This thing, I think it was female, walked around where I was standing, (I was surprised it could walk) it looked lost, and came to me for directions.  Usually when people come to me for help I'm friendly and tell them what they want to know, but I couldn't even look this thing in the eye.  I pointed in a direction that I knew was the longer way to its destination, and just said "that way", turned around and tried to look busy.  I didn't see it again, and I was glad.