An Origin Story. So, I got a story from my friend the other day, and I figured I would share. She works at starbucks, and they get a lot of special people who like to get coffee there. One time she was manning the drive through, and suddenly a busted ass car scrapes along the ground to the window. Inside is, surprise, a massive 400+ pound, badly-dyed-hair-glasses-toting  butterhuffer. So, she asks politely what the beast will be having. The monster orders a Venti (thats like, a large?) caramel frappuchino, but with some creative modifications: Instead of the whole milk they usually use, it requested heavy whipping cream, and wanted to make sure there was at least two inches of fucking caramel at the bottom of the cup. Everyone on headset went silent, and one asked my friend "What... did that customer just order?"  No, my friend isn't part of FPH, but shes very cute and I've been spamming her with links to some of the gold I find on here. She turns to her coworker and says "Ya know... she wanted a venti... beetus" And thus was born a new shitlady.