Planet spilled soda all over me at an event and rested its hamhocks against me Needed to vent somewhere since I could do so at the event. I was at an event yesterday where I was sitting on bleachers in the front row. It was indoors (of course because obeasts are involved) and it was eventually packed so I couldn't even sit anywhere else after the critical event. I got there pretty early so I didn't even realize what was sitting behind me until it was too late. All of a sudden, I hear a noise and then my ass and left side are soaked, along with getting splashed on my shoes and legs (I was wearing shorts). I jumped up and turned around, and it's a "female" planet and a "male" ham. I look down and see a green open cup with ice and clear liquid everywhere. Even though I was thinking "What fucking moron brings an open cup and sets it down on bleachers for them to kick?", I was relieved because I thought it was water. I said "Oh. Well at least it's just water." I figured it would just evaporate and I'd be none the stickier. The planet said nothing, and the male ham went to get paper towels to clean up. I then was like (in my head) "Oh my god. This is a planet. It can't be water." I said "It is water, isn't it??" and it said "No. It's soda." Bitch wasn't even going to tell me when I assumed it was water. I couldn't make a big deal about it at the event, but I was considering just leaving at that point. I was so pissed. Then about a quarter way through the event I was attending, the cunt starts laying one of her fat hamhock legs against my left side (I had moved over to not sit directly in the soda). I turned around to give her a dirty look and I saw what the issue is. The planet couldn't use her atrophied muscles to keep her legs closed. She'd close them and then slowly open then and her hamhock would rest against my side until I glared at it again. TLDR: Planet cunt and ham partner spill soda all over me (and pretty much lies [by omission] about what it was) at an event and then rests hamhock leg against me when I can't sit anywhere else.