Fat neck-beard in the gym Hey guys.  Apologies for length. I have just got in from the gym and thought I would share the amusing whale-related shenanigans I witnessed therein: So, I had just finished my bag work and had started my weights sets downstairs. Now I like to get opposite the mirror, so I can check form and whatnot and I notice this walking (well, waddling) fucking stereotype lumber into the free weights area. The kind of guy who thinks he is 'big and strong'. I am sure you know the type, but just in case, allow me to paint you a picture: Approx 5'10, bald head, glasses, scratty neck-beard, body like a sack of potatoes, legs like matchsticks. Must have been 18-20 stone minimum (250 to 280 in freedom units), I have no idea how the tiny legs supported his bulk. Now of course, it was wearing the 'fat guy gym uniform' of 3/4 length shorts, massive baggy black t-shirt and cheap running shoes (you know, for their usefulness in weightlifting. Sigh). I am already annoyed and offended by the sight of this foul creature, invading my usually shitlord dominated gym, but it got worse, of course it got worse.  So, exactly as I could have predicted, fatty waddles over to the squat rack. Dons a lifting belt (ha!) and starts loading up a ridiculous amount of plates. I am firmly of the opinion that technique and form are far more important than weight so I am thinking "Hmm this should be funny" and start to observe the beast between my sets. At this point barge-arse has seen me watching in the mirror and gives the standard fatty glare. I respond by smiling, a big beaming smile. I have been told I look like I am totally taking the piss, even when I am being genuine so I will leave it to you to imagine how sincere this smile looked.  Anyway, tubs starts doing the inevitable shitty half squats: Awful form, jerky movement, slamming weights back in rack. Every gym sin you can think of, basically. He manages 4. Four fucking squats in a squat rack, with thighs nowhere near parallel to floor.  Naturally, this herculean effort was accompanied by grunting wheezing and gasping. I am trying not to laugh as I begin my squats set. Now, usually I go low with moderate weight (about 60kg), but the prospect of breaking my shit-lording cherry was too much for me: I went looooow. I am talking 'balls slapping back of my heels low'. Nice and slow and smooth, 3 sets of 10 lovely killer squats. I was busy concentrating but I hope I triggered the fat cunt.  I should really thank fatso for inspiring me to push myself harder, but fuck the smelly, fat POS, it was all me. Anyhoo, by the time I am done, he has moved on to...can you guess? Yes, that's right, the leg-press machine (what is it with fats and inappropriate gym exercises?) Again, stupid amounts of weight, max 4 reps and the whole 'dying elephant' sound effects. Having done all of 8 in total, he starts rummaging about in his bag and produces the single most stupid item he could: a protein shake. A. Fucking. Protein. Shake.  Yeah, because you really need to be bulking, you delusional ham. Loose the 2 extra people's worth of weight you are carting around, then you can do human exercises and build muscle. The cherry on top? Fatty waddles off, without returning the plates to the stand and without wiping down the machine. tl:dr: Fatty does pointless, shitty weights set, gets shown how it is done, then has a protein shake and fucks off leaving a mess. Thin privilege is being able and willing to actually squat when doing a squat.