Shitlording at the foodcourt I just got home from meeting up with a relative to go get donuts. It's about 75 degrees (F) right now, the weather is nice so I walked instead of taking the bus. Anyway, I met up and we got our donuts and we began talking about our trip, we need to fly. I've never flown before, but the 'biggest' thing on my mind was the person next to me asking for a seat belt extender. So I loudly, for all the hams nearby (it was a food court, so of course there's a lot of them), exclaim this to which my relative joked that 'she'll just ask for one then' knowing I was going to tell her that 'shes not fat so its not an issue'. By the time this conversation was over the hams were no longer sitting near us, but moved across the park to continue gorging. Afterwards my relative left and I began to take the long way home (I totaled about 2 and a half hours speed walking) so I called up my mother to let her know our plans. I'm still sort of near the food courts (Its a 'big' place) so I get stuck behind this butterbarge, if I was tired of walking at that point I could've sat on her ass and road her up the fucking hill...but who'd wanna get close to that? Anyway, so I start talking about the plane thing again. "If I get squished between my chair and a butter huffer I'm stuffing the rest of their ass in their chair until it breaks and they spill into the isle like a depressing melting slushie." The butterbarge moved over and let me around them.   Maybe I was being a dick, but despite having a calorie dense lunch, I sweat like hell on the way there and home (Taking the long way) so I guess I win out on the end compared to all those that (squeezed on the bus) took the bus home. I'm looking forward to seeing the buttery tears on tumblr later. EDIT: Actually I don't feel bad about this. If you're fat and in public eating calorie dense foods, expect these things. EDIT 2: Fixed typos