Little old shitlady had me laughing for hours While I was shopping for groceries, this little old lady and I kept crossing paths in the store.  Every time I saw her, this 80-year-old woman had her shopping cart parked in the exact middle of the aisle while she looked for something on the shelf.  I squeezed past her once without trying, but the second time she saw me coming she quickly scurried over and moved her cart so it wasn't in the way.  I assumed she just wasn't thinking about it until I saw it happen again.  This time it was an obeast trying to get by her. The little old lady, who was perfectly spry and in shape when she moved the cart for me, was suddenly very slow and decrepit.  She made a huge show of trying to hobble back to her cart and struggle to move it for this 400-pound donut depository.  Of course the lump of lard was too lazy to backtrack down the aisle or help her, so the butter bison just stood there impatiently while the little old woman wiggled the cart, somehow managed to turn it sideways and even more in the way, looked confused and then turned it around in a full loop directly in place.  This went on for another full minute before she finally managed to move it out of the way, but just barely, forcing the Twinkie typhoon to squeeze awkwardly past her on its way to collect more beetus. I just stood a little ways down the aisle pretending to browse through things I didn't actually need so I could watch.  This little old shitlady was purposely getting in the way of obeasts while they shopped, then playing the senility and disability card so that she could deliberately piss them off.  The best part is that no one could possibly say a thing to her because she was just a helpless old woman shopping for groceries.  I was laughing for hours. Old shitpeople are awesome.