It's definitely more of a mental thing than an eating thing. Fat Activism will not help with recovery.  I have lived with an eating disorder for 8ish years (I go through periods of restricting and then binge forever), and I also have Body Dysmorphia.  Like you, my ED gets worse when the number on the scale goes up.  I'm also just screwed because I see fat/nasty no matter my weight (I was 5'3" and barely hitting 90 lbs and STILL thought I was a blimp).  I will forever have a warped sense of my physical self, and no amount of Fat Activism will help my MENTAL disorder.  Fat Activism just pisses me off/makes me feel like shit/confuses me/all kinds of mixed feelings. I really don't understand the argument behind FA being good for ED recovery.  It makes no goddamn sense.  I'm just going to write this off as more hammy delusion. PS Hi fellow eating disordered comrade!