Reading the story about its mother (yeah, it was such a trainwreck I couldn't help myself) made me want to smack it on its fat-Frankenstein shaped head.  Assuming your mother (hmm, no dad in the picture, gee I wonder why) tried to make sure you didn't embarass yourself looking like a slimy bit of pedo-fatfucker-bait in public...yeah, good reason to be whining and bitching about her decades later, you dumb slob.  Go to therapy and shut the fuck up.