Mild Shitlording at the Uni Cafeteria So, at my university, there's this one annoying fat who sits with my friends, and in some sly manner, has merged it's amorphous self (much like a parasite) with my friend group. Damn, this thing tries to talk to me EVERY. FUCKING. DAY. Whatever. Anyways, so we were eating in the cafeteria. I'm no good at explaining, so I made a crude picture showing our part of the cafeteria. I was sitting close to the wall because I, being HUMAN SIZED, could fit. As the fatty came over with its tray of chicken wings, cheesy potatoes, and other kinds of beetus, I could see that it was making a beeline for the seat across mine - and that she was going to knock into the humans sitting behind us. When she got to the table, I said, "Wait!"  It's beady eyes fixed on me, though not with malice.  "You know," I said, trying not to laugh, "Maybe you should sit on the edge. Ya know, because you have a bit of... trouble getting in and out."  The fatty didn't say anything, and for once, she wasn't loud and obnoxious at our table - she sat there, picking at her beetus.