Fat people shoes Ever notice how paper thin the soles of their flipflops are? Fatty Footwear List 1) Old Navy flipflops that bottoms out in a day 2) Crocs, also bottomed out to nothing 3) Ballet flats where they are literally spilling out of all sides and they're the only "formal" shoes their fat hooves can manage since heels would crumble under pressure and create some sort of plastic diamond from the force. 4) Old people shoes with velcro, since bending to tie shoelaces could literally kill them. 5) House slippers outside because they can't be fucked to care about the feet they can't see.