American Airlines' Hamplanet Policy I've been MIA with my workload being heavy as fuck (but not nearly as heavy as a single ass cheek of any of you fine lurking obeasts) Anyways, I've only flown twice in the last 5 years. I truly despise air travel. With FPS's story today about Mr. Butt Sludge, I decided to call up the disability hotline for American Airlines, who I'll be flying with relatively soon. I was directed to this page on their company website, which states: For the safety and comfort of all customers, if a customer’s body extends more than 1 inch beyond the outermost edge of the armrest and a seat belt extension is needed, another seat is required. We encourage customers to address all seating needs when booking. When you call to book, Reservations will make sure you get 2 adjacent seats at the same rate. If you didn’t book an extra seat in advance, ask an airport agent to find out if 2 adjacent seats are available. You may be offered a seat in a higher class of service that may provide more space; in this case, you’ll be responsible for the fare difference. If accommodations can’t be made on your original flight, you can buy seats on a different flight at the same price as your original seats. I figured ya'll would like to have this information in your arsenal. Now onto the request for FPH advice! I plan on bringing a large book with which to firmly defend the space I paid more than $1000 for, as well as earplugs, and something strong-smelling like minty gum (for the inevitable migraine-inducing oreogre stench).  Many of you here advocate very provocative and potentially-self-damaging approaches to dealing with hams in the wild. I salute and admire you all. In this case I am not one of those people in the kind of situation where I can be an overt shitlord. I'm a kill 'em with kindness, technicalities, and plausible deniability kind of shitlord. Any/all suggestions are welcome, though, and when I go next year you will all get the play-by-play, I promise.