Barista Chronicles Vol. II Look. I know I just posted one of these like two days ago. But with totaling 40 comments, I figured you guys wouldn't mind another behind-the-counter rant. Because holy shit, today was absolutely incredible. Last time I talked about general stuff. Today let me share with you a story of someone who decided to ungracefully stomp through my lobby today. This behemoth of a landwhale was in the area of 5'5" height and easily over 300 lbs (or 400? I can't really tell after a point). The kind of fat where cellulite builds in the forehead. She would've been wearing normal clothes, on a normal person, if her massive gunt wasn't so huge that it hung out from the bottom of it. This thing was so huge, I'm sure this person hasn't seen their genitals in decades. So the hamplanet waddles up to the register, gets her drink, and I'm trying not to smirk or laugh as I make drinks. Finally I get to hers. I don't even have to guess, this drink is so beetus-injected it can't be anyone else's. Trenta Strawberry Refresher. No water. No ice.  For those that don't know, Starbucks Refreshers are caffeinated fruit-flavored beverages. They come in a concentrate, to help with stocking them, so we dilute it with water, and then add half a cup of ice on top of that. This person wanted none of it. Straight up, take the carton and just pour it straight into the 32oz cup. Well, just now I did the calculation. This drink, all by itself, is 760 calories and 164g of sugar, liquid heart attack. I've had a sip of straight refreshers before. It's so sweet you can feel your teeth grinding. How this person got a biggest size of it, is absolutely beyond me. BUT THAT'S NOT ALL. Not even 5 minutes go by, I see her back in line. I already know what's going to happen. By the time my attention returns to the register, I see her, getting into an argument with the register barista. She's talking all loudly about why the refreshers aren't covered on the refill price ($0.50 for teas or coffee; refreshers are neither), talking about how she was in another Beetusbucks and they gave it to her there, her fupa is jiggling in the open air, but eventually she calms down when the partner explains to her for the 3rd time that refreshers are neither tea nor coffee. Does she just decide to leave? Nope. She takes out her credit card and buys another $5 deathdrink, picks it up, and wobbles away into the warm sunny day. I hope you guys enjoyed another normal story from your neighborhood barista shitlord. /endrant Volume I