My baby cousin is a shitlord My baby cousin (5 yo currently), lets call him Seth(not real name), has been trained to be a shitlord by my favorite shitlord aunt. My aunt constantly tells him the truth about obeasts, and tells him to actively harass fat people. While I was visiting, she said "If you have any questions about why a person is so fat, just ask them, and if they don't answer, just tell me, and I'll help you." Aunt left for a few hours for a movie, and told me and cousin to walk over to the Walmart a block away. (cousin lives on industrial-downtown suburbs fringe area, where all of the big retail stores are) We walk in, immediately eye down some granola bars on sale, and pick up a box of 48. We proceed up to the freezer section, going to the drinks. The freezer section is where the wild lards roam, so naturally, we see three. One small fat, two planets in the scooters. I give cousin a prompt, to ask why the closest planet is so fat. He asks the fat, and he gets all offended and defensive. The proceeds to be a cute child and asks again, with no luck. He comes back to me, and I loudly say that it may be because  By this point, the other planet moves towards the meat section, after grabbing several frozen goods. Cousin promptly hunts it down, automatically, like a fucking terminator. This fat was even more defensive, trying to shoo away the kid and going full speed ahead. (cousin continued to chase the planet down, bold kid) He continued to bombard the fat with questions, while the fat went red from embarrassment or exhaustion?? (speeding away takes balance!) We got out of Walmart with some snacks and some nice pom wonderful. (haven't tried it before, turns out it is very potent and not for the faint of heart, still very delicious) If it was just me to ask why people are fat, I would be killed in my sleep, but since it is a five year old being curious, we left with nobody wanting to seriously kill any of us. It was one of the better experiences I have had this year. TL;DR Aunt teaches baby cousin to be a shitlord. We walked to Walmart, ask two fats why they are fat. Great results and shitlording via cousin.