TIFU by teaching a 4-year-old why his pig teacher is so mean I work as a nanny/household manager for a very busy professional couple (one is an M.D., the other is a pharmacist). Part of my job is to manage their kitchen including grocery shopping, meal planning, and cooking. Of course I enjoy being a shitlady and making my decisions in the kitchen accordingly, especially when it comes to feeding the children. They are both boys, now ages 2 and 4. I generally feed them very conscientiously, including occasional exposure to treats. I think it's important to include sporadic treats in their diet so that I can teach them how to view them like a shitlord rather than like a fatty. Yesterday I had this conversation with the 4-year-old: Big Brother: Can we have s'mores today? Me: Well... we had s'mores last week. Remember how  we talked about them being a "sometimes" treat? Big Brother: Yeah Me: Do you remember what's in s'mores? Big Brother: Marshmallows! Me: Yep. Lots of sugar in marshmallows. What else? Big Brother: Chocolate chips! Me: Lots of sugar in those too. What else? Big Brother: I forget. Me: Graham crackers. Those have sugar too. Snacks with a lot of sugar are only for "sometimes". Do you remember why? Big Brother: No... Me: Sugar tastes good because it's sweet, but your body only needs a little bit of it. If you eat too much sugar it's not good for your body. Big Brother: Oh [not convinced, looks like he's considering whining] Me: Like, when you feed Buster [family dog], you want to make sure the food is good for his body, right? Big Brother: Yeah Me: Would it be a good idea to give him the wrong kind of food or too much food? Big Brother: No Me: Why not? Big Brother: He wouldn't like it! Me: Right. The wrong kind of food would make him sick and too much food would make him fat. Big Brother: Like Miss Kristen! [one of his daycare workers; not her real name] Me: Yes, like Miss Kristen. And when you let your body get fat, it gets sick. Dogs can't pick out their own food, but people can. It's smart to pick the right kind of food and the right amount of food. You're a smart kid; what's a better snack choice? Big Brother: ... turkey and cheese? Me: Mmmm, that has protein to help your muscles, good idea! Big Brother: [munching on turkey and cheese] Miss Kristen ate too much sugar, she is fat. I'll tell her. Me: O_o   Big Brother: Right Miss Jenny? Me: Uh... right, but don't say that to Miss Kristen. Big Brother: I don't like her. Me: Why not? Big Brother: She's mean. I'll tell her [about eating too much sugar] so she will be nicer. [equating fat with mean -- see he IS a smart kid  -- see the story I posted about first meeting this kid, he was already a shitlord] Me: I'm sorry to hear that. Mean teachers aren't fun. [Changes the subject because I don't want to get fired for egging the kid on.]