Remember the fat fuck that cut his dick off? http://www.sickchirpse.com/georgia-man-cuts-off-penis-stop-masturbatin/ I was 110% sure it was an Onion type article.  I was just talking to a friend in Augusta... She confirms the story, it is real.  If you are gonna be ugly you gotta be smart, cause dumb and ugly is going to make for a really bad life...