One is the HMS Zealandia, a mixed function passenger/cargo ship launched in 1909. She worked hard all her life, and was sunk during a Japanese raid on Darwin, Northern Australia in 1942. Two men went down with the ship. Decades on her wreck is a popular dive site. The other is Unholy Mess Zelandwhale, a complete shambles of a human being. She has never worked hard in her life, and lost her humanity after a sustained decades-long assault of pies, cake, and beetusjuice. No man in his right mind would go down on that. In a few years she will be a cautionary tale on the dangers of gluttony.