Translating Swinese into english Swinese: I barely ate anything today, I only ate dinner. Translation: I had a 1000 calorie Starbucks eldritch abomination for Breakfast, a 440 cal snickers bar for lunch, a 1000 cal hearty dinner, and a 1000 cal bag of chips as a lat night snack.   Swinese: I workout all the time. Translation: I infrequently run less that 2 miles burning less than 200 calories. Then immediately drink 200 cals worth of Beetus-aid® when I'm done.     Swinese: I eat less than my thin friends. Translation: I  only see my my thin friends eat as special events and I extrapolate that they eat that way all the time, like me.   Swinese: I'm a confident BBW Goddess and I love myself.  Translation: Please say I'm Pretty. Please say I'm Pretty. Please say I'm Pretty. OH GOD, Please say I'm Pretty!    Swinese: I've done literally everything to lose weight Translation: I've done literally nothing to lose weight.   Swinese: I have conditions that make it impossible to lose weight. Translation: I looked on WebMD to find stuff that makes you more prone to gaining weight, and decided I have that.   Swinese: I'm healthy at my size and you can't tell me otherwise. Translation: Having to take a break after climbing one flight of stairs in normal...Right?!   If you guys have anymore put them in the comments.