Bulbous beast barges into our pedicure; probably scars young lady pedicurist for life My wife and I were in the midst of a pedicure date. All was going well - until this drunk beast waddled in and took a seat across from us: Fat-Footed Drunk Lecherous Fuck Just look at the lascivious gaze he has fixated on that unfortunate pedicurist. That young lady is now a permanent fixture in his spank bank - guaranteed that’s the closest he ever gets to a woman. Poor girl - handling that thing's feet surely gave her a hard case of PTSD.  When he walked in, the gut hanging out of his shirt entered the room before the rest of him.  His old T-shirt couldn’t conceal it all (no T-shirt could). He wore dirty flip-flops. With much effort, he got himself into a chair, but it took lots of squirming and adjusting to get his blubber situated.  He tried making slurred-speech small talk, which we pretty much ignored until he quit.  Couldn’t understand his Drunklish anyway. Occasionally he let out a guttural sigh as that poor girl did her thing. Did the pedicure feel that good, or was he getting off?  Probably both. At one point he said to no one in particular that he “walked 10 miles a day at work, sometimes 12.”  Yeah, rrrrriiiiiiiight.   Things got worse for a while when his buddy, who was even fatter and more disgusting, came in to check on him.  He was drunk, too, and said he would wait in the truck and drink more beer.  I tried to catch a photo of them both, but wasn’t quick enough. While our pedicure date wasn’t totally ruined, it was tainted.  At least it gave us something to laugh about afterwards.