Reminds me of a weight loss success story I saw a while back.  The woman wrote this piece about how she noticed everyone treating her better after she lost a lot of weight, and for a while that pissed her off. But then she started to pay attention, and think about it more, and was like "oh shit, people are being better to me because I'm being better to them". She realized that because she always felt like shit, and felt like shit about herself, she [sometimes]subtly took it out on those around her.  If only more of them would realize this shit.