Ragin Asstain's latest blog update about her Iron Man "training." File this one under "Things that totes happened". I was curious to see if our prized pig friend Ragen was still planning to do the Ironman 70.3 in Tempe, so I did a quick google and came to her Ironfat wordpress page. Wouldn't you know it, she had just uploaded an entry earlier in the day! However, I must say for someone who claims to be such an elite-professional-amazing-athlete, training for this thing doesn't really seem to be a priority to Asstain. Looking at her blog, there isn't many entries at all. Hmmm.... thats weird Anyway, I was reading her bullshit story of riding 50 plus miles this morning, (same woman who could barely ride a bike a few months ago) and the whole fucking story needs to be in r/thathappened because its so completely full of shit. Before I get to the worst part, let me show this gem: Then he asked “Are you training for something?”  I said “I have a Half IRONMAN next month (I know it’s not a Half IM, it’s  an IM 70.3 but I was too tired to care).  He said, without hesitation “You’ll do it. You’ll do it.”  I actually teared up a little bit, and said “Thanks so much, have a great ride” He said “You too.” and I rode away.  It was a lovely interaction that restored my faith in cycling humanity. First off, isn't that exactly what she is doing, a half ironman? Is this sow so stupid she doesn't realize that this isn't the full Ironman competition? If so, I kinda wonder how Ragen can find the on button to her computer, let alone write a blog but I digress. I am more of a runner than a cycler, but aside from the occasional friendly "hello" or hand wave, I have yet to see cyclists pass by other cyclists only to engage them in unnecessary conversation. Usually people don't stop random strangers during their daily lesuire/exercise time on tight paths with quick moving objects, but hey this is Ragen we are talking about! It always happens to her you guys! And what would a good Ragin' Asstain made-up story be if it didn't have criticism in it? Credible, for one. This next excerpt of bullshit comes about after a group of men (of course, gotta fit in those cliches) passes her and doesn't acknowledge her. She talks about how "odd" this is, and that most people will usually greet you when they pass you on the trails. Then, about a half mile down the trail they catch up to her, "cut around her really tight", and then proceed to swerve and block her entire path. I'm sure you see where this is going.  Dude:  “How far are are you going” Me:  “I’m 33 into 56” Dude: “Minutes?” Me: (rolling my eyes) “Miles” Dude:  “No way, prove it!” Me: (Knowing that they knew damn well that I was out here for more than 30 minutes because they had first passed me 21 miles ago) “I’m actually fine with you thinking I’m a liar, that’s no problem at all.” Dude: “Aw don’t be mad, we’re just kidding we know you’ve been out here a while.” Me: “Whatever, have a good ride.” First off, these guys were going in the opposite direction of her earlier in the story, and now somehow they managed to end up behind her. Does she really believe anybody believes that people, especially men, would go out of their way to follow her? If anything, she probably was wobbling on her bike trying to maintain her constant 2mph speed, clogging the fucking trail, when actual humans tried to pass her. Ragen doesn't seem to get that someone saying "left" is more about bike etiquette then being rude and unsocial. I'm pretty sure thats biking 101 and you are supposed to move over, but no, not our special snowball. I am so totally sure that this group of men gave two fucks as to where this digusting butterball was going and how far it had to travel to get there. If they were asking her anything, it was probably direction so that they could avoid her downwind and wouldn't get caught in her stench.  Oh, Ragen you dumb fucking cunt. I think I speak for everyone when I say I cannot wait to see you fail in spectacular fashion this coming fall at the Tempe 70.3. Elite athlete you are not. In fact, by calling yourself that (and participating in this race), you are insulting all the hard working disciplined athletes that train for years to get to this level. You are nothing but a fat fucking joke, and you deserve to be treated as such. When I think of IronMan, I think of one of the hardest races that takes some of the most determined athletes, not a fake blob of narcissism like yourself. I wonder what excuse this lard barge will make up this time, we should start a betting pool. I truly cannot stand this butter cunt.