Fat Roomate Starvashun Modes I had a fatty roommate in freshman year of college.  It was your typical loser Bio student pretending to be pre-med because it watches Grey's Anatomy. This was also a time where pick-up-artistry was at an all time high, and lardo thought 'the game' was solid advice for picking up chicks. Needless to say, fattymagoo did not have any success with women. I think it made out with (gross) a drunk chick once the entire year. It probably didn't even really happen. I digress.  Fatty would obviously eat like a pig. And everyone should know how readily available shit food is while living in the dorms. As far as roommates were concerned though, I've had much fatter and much worse, but those stories are for another time. Luckily, lardass would go to bed at the same time as me every night (a courteous fatty, who knew). Frequently, and always after 'working out', about 2 minutes after turning out the lights, I would hear a drawer open, and wrappers rustling. I've always been a shitlord, so the very first time I heard this happen I asked him what he was doing, and he proceeded to talk about how if he doesn't eat before he goes to bed he will get muscle atrophy.  He had a little drawer full of granola bars and other snacks that he would dig into, in the dark of night, under the blankets, before drifting off to sleep, to make sure his 'muscles' don't atrophy.  Do fatties dream of electric Twinkies?