Fatties at the nursing home; Beds. a.k.a "What do you mean the bed is broken?" Hi FPH, Shitlord nurse Alpaca at your service with another story from the nursing home. This time we'll be touching on the subject of beds. All of our patients have the same bed. It's a regular sized bed, I think it's called a single. Approximately 36 inches wide. The bed can hold 660 lbs. It's adjustable, and it has ledges you can put up to prevent falling; You can make it go up, down. You can make one part go up, one part go down, so on and so forth. You get the picture. It looks something like this. So, our patients don't tend to have a problem with the beds. Some might inquire about why they need to have the ledge put up ("to prevent you from rolling out in the middle of the night"). However, the people who do have a problem with the beds have all been exclusively fat.  . The bed is too small. We've already established that the bed is normal sized. It's not luxurious, but it's a normal sized one. You can sleep in it comfortably, and even roll around with few issues. Sam, however, had issues.  Sam is a fatty. He's in a wheelchair. He was fat before the wheelchair, and he will remain fat cause he eats like food will stop existing tomorrow. Sam can't move his legs much, and he can't move one of his arms much either, so it's up to me and my collegues to change his diaper and stuff. It's about as fun as it sounds. We tend to smalltalk while doing this. "So Sammy, are you feeling alright?" "YEAH, BUT I HATE THESE BEDS" "Aha?" "The Bed is too small" "Length?" (On top of being fat, he's tall) "NO. WIDE. It's not WIDE enough! What are these tiny beds you guys have!?" "The're normal sized.." "No they're NOT. They're TINY. I DEMAND a bigger bed." Well, they don't make bigger beds in our country, so poor poor Sammy will just have to sleep in his tiny tiny tiny tiny bed til the end of his days.  . What do you mean the bed is broken!? Tina didn't have any issues with the size of the bed. However, the bed had an issue with the size of Tina. To this day I'm still not sure exactly how much she was packing, but it must have been a lot. Again, we have to change her cause she can't do it herself. I'm not sure what happens since I'm not in her room but all of a sudden I hear a metallic CRACK. We sometimes hear strange noises, so I thought little of it, until one of my coworkers poked her head into the kitchen where I was preparing dinner. "Paca, we need help. Tina's bed is broken." Wat. "What do you mean the bed is broken?" Those beds are sturdy. How the hell can you break it? We go into Tina's room and I see that the bottom half of the bed is somehow lower than normal. Another coworker is pushing the buttons on the bed in a panic, but the bed is stuck. Tina's laying on top of it like a stranded whale.  I make my coworkers lift Tina up so I can examine the bed. I try pressing the up button, and this time the lower half of the bed shoots up with a second metallic CRACK. Tina gets back on the bed, and we try pushing it up and down. As soon as it goes down the lower part gives away with the same crack as before. We lift her up, again, and do the same thing over. In the end it turns out that while she's not too fat for the bed, she's too fat to make it get stuck if you push it too low. The bed frame plops down and gets stuck in all of the machinery at the bottom of the bed. The amount of times I had to fix that stupid bed before she left our facility is too damn high.