I am both entertained and exasperated by the mayo situation. I always ask for "a TINY little bit, like a super skinny single line, of light mayo." Then as they try to do multiple thick lines I go "STOP!! TOO MUCH!!" And then I make them scrape off 75% off what they put on. Then, when I am satisfied and they are piggered, I say "Now, about half that amount of honey mustard please." It's hilarious watching them get pissy, but also obnoxious that I have to be that ridiculous to get the sammich I want and not one that's drowned in goop.