Why do fats pretend to be runners? So I am a former D1 collegiate runner who works at a running store.  While I was at a local 5k this week, I was puzzled by something. Fat people always want to be runners/endurance athletes.  WHY?  Average people don't pretend they are some sort of long distance running champions, so why are fats so fixated on it?   Is it like when a dog rides a skateboard, it is interesting because its something that shouldn't be possible? Just for fun, quick fat people stories from the last couple of races I have run.  (I run a lot of races since my work sponsors me) 1)  Fat man with a big beer gut chats with me after a race and asks how I ran.  When I mentioned my time, he remarked that it must be my shoes (racing flats) and that if he had shoes like that, he could probably run fast too.  He was dead serious. 2)  Chunky girl with a fupa, double chin, no thigh gap and cankles tries to make her way into the elite start coral for a 1/2 marathon.  She cries when they won't let her in.  The volunteer says "only elite runners".  She sobs that she is elite because ran a 5k last year.   3)  On a 2 loop 10k course, a herd of fats stopped at the finish line after their first lap.  They took pictures and blocked the 10k finishers from crossing the finish line.  (This is why I hate looped courses) 4) The best.  At the post race refreshment table, some fatty-mc-back-bacon comes to the table and starts taking some food.  The refreshments are mostly bagels, protein bars, muffins and gatoraid for runners.  Clearly this fatty wanted more than her mouth could handle so she starts grabbing armfuls of food and shoving it in her tent sized shirt. A volunteer (a friend of mine) starts walking toward the greedy butterhuffer.  The thieving fatty panics and tries to make a get away, but trips and hits the ground hard!   She then makes some gurgling sound while lying prone on the ground.  The best part?  This fatty wasn't even involved with the race, she didn't run it or have friends/family running it.  I guess she just followed her nose to find some food.