Fatties on Ice! So, over the past few months, I have been learning basic ice skating skills with the goal of learning to speed skate. I've mostly been doing this by going to public skating sessions at the local indoor ice rink. Needless to say, I've fallen quite a bit. I wouldn't say I've fallen a lot, but it's definitely something I've stopped being actively afraid of - it's just something that comes with learning to skate. When I'm on the ice, I pretty much just keep to myself for the most part and stick to focusing on my own thing. A common thing I've heard while (unintentionally) eavesdropping on people are things like "at least I didn't fall" or "haha - s/he fell" from people who don't really spend much time skating. I don't really think falling should be something to be ashamed of and it's definitely discouraging people to try hard and put in a better effort when people "fall shame" so to speak, for lack of a better phrase. I usually don't think any less of people who have a fall. That being said.... Then there are fatties. They're always clinging to the walls with their friends and giggling "skating is so hard! teehee!" Even with clinging to the walls... fatties fall all the time.  They fall just trying to stand. They lack any sense of balance. You see a normal human learning to ice skate and if they start to wobble a bit, they usually have a fair shot of regaining their balance. Not fatties though. One little teeter and it's like watching the aftermath of someone poking a wrong Jenga piece. I've seen posts complaining about fatties ruining yoga or fatties ruining dancing/ballet and I see very strong similarities with ice skating. Fatties can't do yoga. Fatties can't dance. And, and fatties most certainly cannot ice skate. Many people, particularly females, where leggings on the ice - as with most things, this doesn't really bother me if humans are doing it - but too many femayos have this profound compulshun to show off their bootiful curdly curves on the ice. The particular ice rink I'm at has a staff person on or near the ice at all times to assist anyone that might have fallen and injured themselves and to make sure that people are being respectful and safe on the ice.  One of these safety people is a fat - she's probably almost if not already a deathfat.  She is literally a sphere with with legs and arms. I have no idea who thought it was a good idea for her to have this job. She has manages to not fall over for no apparent reason, but apart from slow gliding, she can't really do anything else. I literally have no idea how she would actually help someone if they were injured - there's no way she's coordinated or stable enough to help someone up or move something/someone on the ice. She'd probably slip and fall on them, crushing them. Now, there was one thing I witnessed that gave me the biggest shitlord boner ever. There are often some figure skaters who use public sessions to work on some things, but they for the most part, have their own special sessions that are just for figure skaters where they can work on some of the more difficult things. Anyway, because there are sometimes figures skaters in the public sessions, I've gotten to see them try/practice many different things and have a general idea of what various moves are supposed to look like. In one of the public sessions, there was this ham figure skater. This femayo was definitely not a deathfat, but probably around a 5'6" 200 pounder at least.  She was skating around warming up, and I was surprised. This butterball had decent balance, could skate backwards, switch from front-to-back, and do crossovers pretty well. These are not fancy moves by any means and surprising that an obeast could manage this level of coordination. I concluded that she must have been figure skating most of her life growing up and still has most of the skills that she learned and then ballooned up to the obeast she is today.  I was stunned - surely she must be deficient somewhere. Then, something glorious happened. The universe would not disappoint. This was far more satisfying to me than watching a fatty fall. I could see her prepping to do a simple jump - I've seen these sequences of motions many times in other skaters. She's going through the motions and right at the point that a human figure skater would leave the earth, I could not visibly see any appreciable gap between it and the ice. This was supposed to be a simple jump that started going in forward and ended backwards. It went through all the motions that it remembered from when it was younger and human, and it basically just turned into an unimpressive front-to-back transition. Maybe if you didn't stuff your face, you could actually continue to do what you used to and feel what it's like to jump and spin on the ice like a real figure skater. The actually impressive, visually appealing parts of figure skating (and dancing or yoga) are inaccessible to fatties. If you were any respectable human, this should be a wake-up call, but I'm sure you've had plenty in the past and not done anything about it. Gravity, as always, is the ultimate shitlord. Especially on ice.