SHITLORD SAFARI - A fun and educational game for two. PLEASE PLAY THIS GAME with your favourite shitperson. I'd just like to thank everyone here for being so great, I hope to share the joy of the 'ham game' with you all.  I hope one day to make this an app similar to Pokemon Go with augmented reality ham capture and sizing and everything. The basic premise is to be physically with a partner in public, and try and spot 'hams' faster than the other person. The hams below described in terms of UK dress sizing, so you may need to adjust. Both parties mutually agree to each sighting. How to play: SCORING: Game plays until either opponent reaches 5 hams spotted. This introduces an element of strategy RE:smallhams. Each ham spotted gains you the total dress size, thus two 18s and a 24 is 60 points.  Current 'trophy ham' is worth DOUBLE points. Introducing 'quick reversal' possibilities for higher class deathfats. CATCHING: Each player has a specific cough or small click noise they make, indicating a sighing to the other player. The player 'losing' sights the fat and makes a verbal declaration on size (eg, 20) If agrees, no more is said. Players must negotiate to agreement is disputed. Player with current biggest ham decides if split. ADVANCE PLAYS For those who enjoy gambling, it is possible to spread bet in advance or on certain trips. For instance 'I'll bet you cant get over 110' before we get there, or 'your over under on 10 in McDonalds is 200'. You will find the key is to be aware of your surroundings and demographic here. I hope I have explained this game well, do ask if unclear. Enjoy shitlords and ladies!