Biblical Shitlording I know that many of us are atheist, agnostic, humanist, pastafarian, etc. But I do love how the Bible has been shaming fats for thousands of years. Three points: First, the classic gluttony being a deadly sin spoken into the ear of Moses by God himself. Right off the bat, the big guy warns his people that shoving more than you need into your trap will literally kill you. Secondly, while being led out of Egypt by God himself, the now free Jews start complaining that they wish they could still be captive slaves under Pharaoh because at least back there they got big pots of meat and onions and garlic - all of which they had as much of as they could eat. (Exodus - fucking jerks were provided mana {salt bread} from thin air everyday - just enough to sustain their journey back to Israel - magical food from God! Not good enough....would rather be whipped and build pyramids and get unlimited pots of boiled fat) And Lastly, (my personal fave) Paul (the apostle) has to write a scathing letter to the new church in Corinth to advise them to literally put security at the doors during communion because fatties from the city sneak in during the ceremony, eat most of the bread and guzzle wine to the point of drunkenness, and then peace-out the back doors. So if you believe in the man upstairs or not, he certainly was a Holy Shitlord!