[Rant] My father's delusion My father is a completely delusional obeast. 130kg/286lbs and 181cm/5'9. He jokingly said that he can barely wait for me to complete my nutritional science degree so that I'l get his shit together. I told him that he should pig out less and move more. It's not like he doesn't know what to do, as he has dropped down to 90kg/198lbs two times before and then just gained it all back.  [As a result of his incompetence, I was an obese kid and have been human sized ever since realising that I needed to be fit in order to get laid easier.] I told him to stop being a dumb fat fuck and to quit doing the bullshit jojo dieting. I'm an alternative guy and have a few piercings(including a septum). He told me to calm myself down before he starts dragging me around by my septum. I told him that he couldn't even catch me and that the only way he'd get close to me is if I was to get caught in his gravitational pull. I called his bluff and told me to start chasing me. Guess who said that he needs three months to prepare? Yeah. Everyone else laughed at him(we were at a picnic). And of course he was shirtless the entire time so that his fat was quiverring all over the place.