By Popular Demand: Initial Meeting of CryingHam, yes, there is crying I was asked by some fellow shitlords for more interactions with CryingHam so I decided to share the first time meeting of him. I'm going to start by introducing the characters. Me: Your resident shitlord forced into this situation. Friend: Close female friend of mine who made the unfortunate mistake of dating a ham. She is now well on her way to becoming a proper shitlady. CryingHam: The fatass suicidal man child that was featured here and here FakeDate: Attractive female friend that I brought with me to the initial meeting to try to establish to CryingHam that I wasn't a threat to him. Very sociable, non-shitlady. PsychoEx: Mentioned, not featured. My current girlfriend of the time(now ex) that is a jealous, psycho bitch shitlady. At the start of this tale Friend has been dating CryingHam for approximately a month. For an unknown reason despite Friend having numerous male friends she hangs out with CryingHam isolates me as an imminent threat of "stealing her away" and insists he meets me. He apparently cries to her every time he finds out I was hanging out with her. I honestly have no fucking clue why he considers me a threat. My guess is I was her platonic +1 to a wedding a few months prior. Friend asks me if I could just meet him so he would stop crying and bitching about me. I reluctantly agree. Timeline wise this is about mid summer 2015 and he would be moving in September of 2015(got evicted from his apartment) and then be thrown out around December of that year from her apartment. I decide the best way to show I'm not a threat is to bring another girl with me to the meeting. My first idea is to bring PsychoEx, but I thought better of that because if he got really stupid she would explode on him and cause a huge incident. Plus, when she drinks she can't stop insulting fatties. Instead, I invite FakeDate because she would be more diplomatic about any stupid shit he brings up. She also is on good terms with Friend so I figure that's a bonus. We all meet up at a bar and he is instantly on top of me asking a dozen questions. I don't like him. It's not because he's a ham, well that's part of it, he's just a one upping tool. FakeDate and Friend are talking to each other while he bombards me with questions. I decide I have more in common with a ballerina than with him. And, about the only thing I have in common with ballerinas is we are both thin. Kind of wishing I took PsychoEx with me. About 20 minutes later I start ignoring him and start talking to FakeDate. Me and FakeDate are having a real conversation that Friend gets drawn into. CryingHam keeps trying to chime in, but gets ignored because everyone he brings up is stupid and not related to the conversation. He keeps trying to make the conversation about him. Me, FakeDate and even Friend don't care about him in this conversation. He is bringing nothing of value and just trying to bring in personal stories that have no relation to what we are talking about. At some point in the conversation CryingHam goes outside. He's out there a long time. Friend decides to go look for him and finds him sitting on the sidewalk crying. He is upset that I made no effort to be his friend and that he was being really nice to me and it's not fair that I don't like him. Friend tells him that maybe he should try to talk me about something I'm interested in instead of just himself. CryingHam comes back in, eyes red and cheeks wet. He starts telling me about his apartment issues(I work for a real estate company) and how he was evicted from 2 different apartments in 4 months and that it's not fair. I tell him he's an asshole and needs to pay his rent. He tries to explain to me about all his needed expenses and how it's expensive to be a vegan. I shut him down and flat out tell him I don't care and he has an obligation to pay his rent and if he can't he needs to find a cheaper place to live. FakeDate is more sympathetic but agrees that the Landlord needs his money. CryingHam is depressed that no one cares about his financial woes. Really wishing I brought PsychoEx with me now. I go back to talking to FakeDate and Friend joins in because CryingHam now is just staring at his drink all sad. About 30 minutes to an hour later I decide I had enough and tell FakeDate we are leaving. I say goodbye to Friend and then CryingHam who gives me a halfhearted farewell. Apparently, after I leave CryingHam starts crying again about how I made no effort to be his friend and he doesn't want her hanging out with me anymore. She basically tells him "Well, why would he be your friend? You were acting like a complete asshole to him." This apparently was not the proper response from her and he started crying more. I really do regret not bringing PsychoEx with me. Damn me for trying to be nice.