Dear fatty fat fatty Please stop trying to be "alternative". All the piercings and hair dye in the world won't distract from your planetary alignment.  Love,  The purple-haired shitlord that you wouldn't stop glaring at.  The story:  Went to a small venue concert tonight. I'm a little buzzed, so this may be fragmented. Oh well. It was my first heavy metal concert (went to a metal concert earlier in the year, but Ghost isn't really heavy. Tonight was Deicide, so a whole different level) Oh. God. The hams! All in skimpy ass outfits with fupa hanging out. Both male and female! Ugh. Guess the gender all night long. One hammy was trying to be tough (can't be girly? Go for "one of the guys"!) and went into the pit. Came limping out during the same song saying she was pushed. WTF did you think the pit was? It's my first rodeo and even I knew what would happen! She already had a brace on her knee too. Let me guess, too much gunetiks?  There was one glorious being though. Muscle shirt showing just enough skin. Kinda had a metal-hipster look going for him. The rest were skinny fats or hams.  Fuck. I'm disappointed in the makeup of the area scene, but what is to be expected when most of the population is planetary.  Also, the bartender said he was getting stiffed left and right. Sure enough, a ham-man waddles up and orders beer. Pays, doesn't tip. I guess he needs that money for McD or Waffle House after the concert. Fuck that! Bartender was in good shape, so I left $20 on a $28 tab.