Latina-the-Hutt loses an argument, two months later gets her ex-con cousin to threaten my life and the welfare of my family I don't like bringing back up this memory, but I'm skinny and the perpetrator is one of the fattest things I've ever seen so here goes. The only way to picture this monstrosity is to think of a pale, 5 foot  jabba with long black hair. Put some mexican lip liner and bright red lipstick on it, and shave away the tail to be replaced with voluminous folds of ugly fabric, and you have this thing.  I mean, there's fat, and then there's amorphous blob, and she crossed the line long ago. I can't stress enough how she literally has no neck, just a slope from her ears to her shoulders. BACKGROUND In 2013 I moved to a new job in a new city with my wife and dog after graduating college. No friends, no family, but we're really active churchgoers so we make some friends there. I end up working with the youth and they ask me to lead the scout troop. There's only six or so boys, but I get along great with them and they all appreciate me for my no-nonsense, fun-loving attitude. THE SETUP Every three months we set up a joint troop activity where three nearby troops get together for a large activity. The first one I'm in charge of, the boys all want to go rock climbing. I do lots of prep work to make sure reservations, instructors, permission slips, etc are all organized and good to go. A few days before the event, I send out an email to everyone reminding them about the activity. Here is the actual message, edited for privacy: This Tuesday night, we need to have everyone who will be going to XXXXXX bring their waivers (adults and youth), permission slips (youth only). If you don't have your permission slips, tough luck! See you all there. THE "INCIDENT" Immediately I receive an email from the mother of two of the boys, complaining that 'tough luck' isn't the right attitude for a youth leader to have, blah blah blah. I wrote her back and told her to mind her own business, and that if her kids don't have permission slips, it is, in fact, tough luck that their mother makes excuses for them instead of making sure they're prepared.  I'll admit it was pretty harsh, but true. Again, I took a very no-nonsense approach to leading the scout troop, which is one reason they trusted me to be in charge of organizing a dangerous activity. I then get a novel from this beast, which I completely ignore, and I tell her that I didn't read her email and have no interest in her psychotic ravings. She clearly has issues, and I want nothing to do with any of them. I blocked her email, and that was that. Every other parent was CCed on all of these emails, and nobody said anything. Apparently she's always been a PITA but nobody ever told her off. Her boys showed up to the activity, and I continue to have a good relationship with them to this day, despite being very strict. UNFORGIVABLE Fast forward 3 months. It's sunday, and I'm at church where we've switched from the chapel to sunday school, where I teach the boys. Before I can get to class, a fat mexican guy with tattoos all over his neck waves me over. When I get there, he starts talking about how he finally got out of prison recently, and he's heard about what I said to his cousin and he thinks I owe her an apology. He makes insinuations about how I, my wife, and my little dog should 'understand the importance of doing what's right for your family'.  I didn't know whether to cry or cut his fucking head off. I'm a pretty decent fighter, but it took all of my strength to be a good example for the kids (since obviously they weren't getting any from their parents) and also think about my family. Sure, I could beat the shit out of this guy, and even get him arrested for violating his parole. But then what? Worry about the next time he gets out? The guy is clearly too dumb to deal with rationally. Should I take the chance that someone 'accidentally' runs over my dog? How much is my pride worth? So I gritted my teeth and basically apologized to the blobsteress. I was impossibly polite. I could see she was actually getting mad that I was just agreeing and apologizing to her. She was expecting an argument, and I refused to give her one. When she started to argue, I said "I'm not here to argue, just to say I'm sorry. Is there anything else I can do to apologize for my behavior?" I have no clue how I made it through it. 10 minutes later she has nothing else to say but 'make sure you apologize to my husband, he was really offended at how you treated me'. Poor husband. Dude is fit as fuck. His wife is easily twice his weight and 2/3 his height. When he found out what happened, he thanked me for being, as he put it, 'incredibly big' about the situation. I felt so sorry for him. But damned if I didn't fantasize about doing terrible things to that damned ham of his. TLDR: Hamplanet has hurt feelings in an email exchange and I block her email address, she gets her cousin to threaten me at church where I teach her kids.