The Fat Bridesmaid, Part 6: The Ceremony & Photos Here is part 6 in the saga of The Fat Bridesmaid. If you're not caught up on the story this far, you can find the rest of it here: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 After everyone is finished with hair, make-up, and getting dressed, the photographer showed up at my parents' house to take a few photos before we got into the limo and went to the church. He lined us all up across the walk-way in front of my parents' house to take a few pictures with the house in the background. My sister (the bride) is in the middle of the walkway, with me and my other sister on either side of her. The other 2 bridesmaids were beside my other sister, and Hamderella was directed to stand beside me. Well, at least she's on the outside, we can crop her out of the photos with relative ease. Hamderella was standing there, and must have shifted her massive weight, because without warning, she goes down. She grabs onto my arm, and almost drags 3-and-half-months-pregnant me down with her. My mom immediately came rushing over to me to make sure I was OK. My sisters are also concerned with my safety at this point. "I'm fine too," The Fat Bridesmaid snaps as she stands up, sounding butthurt that everyone was fussing over me who didn't actually fall, insead of her. I just glared at her, and reassured everyone that I was OK. The ceremony was beautiful. Despite being in a church, my sister and her husband had opted for a non-religious ceremony, so it was only about half an hour long. After the ceremony, the bridal party was directed outside for some photos with the fall foliage before we took off in the limo for more formal ones. It was somewhat overcast, and 11 degrees Celsius outside (that's about 52 degrees in Freedom units). Everyone, including the bride, was wearing a floor-length dress, but they were all sleeveless. Needless to say, we were all a bit chilly. The Fat Bridesmaid proudly exclaimed, "see? This is where I have the advantage over you skinny girls!" I scoffed and whispered to my husband "yeah, and that's the only advantage." He let out a chuckle, and Hamderella went bright red. I'm not sure if she actually heard me, or if she was just embarassed because nobody acknowledged her fatlogic. After a few quick pictures, it was time to get into the limo and head out for the formal photos. The limo in the parking lot on the other side of the church, so we all had to walk across the church lawn to get to it. Since it's autumn now, the lawn was strewn with dead leaves and these tiny mystery fruits that looked like miniature apricots. The Fat Bridesmaid exclaims that it's too hard to walk across the grass in heels, her feet hurt from standing "so long" for the ceremony and the photos, and takes off her shoes. She waddles across the grass, and gets into the limo. I get into the limo too, and the smell hits me like a brick wall; like rotting fruit, but much worse. One of the other bridesmaids exclaims, "it stinks in here." We look over at The Fat Bridesmaid, who is now wiping pieces of rotten fruit from the bottom of her feet, and throwing the used napkins on the floor of the limo. "It was those things on the lawn!" fatty exclaims. We all start checking our shoes for these things, but it seems like she's the only one with any on her. It seems they burst under her massive weight, but just sank into the ground whenver a normal-sized bridesmaid stepped on them. We get to the first location for our formal photos. The Fat Bridesmaid is still complaining that her feet hurt, and says she is going to wear her flat shoes instead of her heels. My sister (the bride) asks her to wear her heels for the photos, especially since fatty is so much shorter than everyone else in the wedding party. Hamderella pouts, and says she'll carry her heels with her and change into them for the photos. The photographer does a few photos of my sister and her husband, then a few photos of just the groomsmen. He calls us ladies over for the next shot. "Wait!" exclaims Hamderella, "I have to change into my heels!" So we are all stuck waiting while fatty puts on her heels. Once the photographer gets the shots he wanted, he dismisses us ladies for a few minutes, and takes a few more photos of just the men. The Fat Bridesmaid has found a bench in the meantime, and changed back into her flats. The photographer would now like us all to walk to a different area for some additional shots. Hamderella is still sitting on the bench. "Can't I just sit for a minute?" she whines. "I'm tired from being on my feet all day." My sister (the bride) and the photographer both look annoyed at this point. "We have to keep going or else we won't have enough time to get all the photos I need," the photographer says. We all walk over to the new spot the photographer has picked out (maybe 100 feet from the bench) and have to wait again for Hamderella to change her shoes. Once we were in the limo again, The Fat Bridesmaid insisted on removing her shoes, and kept us all waiting with the shoe-changing routine at the second photo location. TL;DR: Fat Bridesmaid falls down during photo shoot, tries to grab onto me (who is 3.5 months pregnant!) and almost drags me down with her. Fatty is butthurt that everyone is more concerned about my well-being than hers. Fatty then stinks up the limo with her disgusting hooves because she refuses to wear shoes inside, and also she ran through a bunch of rotted fruit. Then fatty makes everyone wait for her to make multiple shoe-changes during professional photos. It looks like I've reached my posting limit for the day, but stayed tuned for tomorrow when I will post the thrilling conclusion to the Fat Bridesmaid Saga! Edit: Read The Fat Bridesmaid, Part 7: The Final Chapter here!