I "accidentally" knocked the phone out of a fatty's hands This fat cunt got to the gym around the same time I did today. My gym has lockers that you can put in your own combination to lock (I always forget my lock) so I was changing out of church clothes and into workout clothes when a femayo showed up and I shit you not, tee-heed at me.  "Oh good! I saw you coming in and thought you would be working out in what you were wearing! I was worried!" You thought I was going to work out in a knee length dress and heels? Ooookay.  I didn't answer because I don't acknowledge fats if I can help it. Changed and locked my things and went to weigh myself. When I came back the femayo was seated in front of a mirror in its spandex with a makeup bag out in front of it, making one of those fish faces for Lord knows what reason. I'd forgotten to stash my sun glasses so did so and proceeded with my workout.  When I came back 45 minutes later to stash my phone and do strength training the femayo was standing on the phone. It was leaning against my locker and giggling.  "Excuse me," I said, and gestured to my phone. The thing gave me a look and shifted two whole inches to the left, still obscuring most of my locker with its fat. I cleared my throat again and gave it a look like "get the fuck out of the way." IT ROLLED ITS EYES AT ME and then moved. Angry, I figured at that point it couldn't possibly be there when I got back. It got off the phone and sat down on the bench again, holding the phone over its ginormous fupa.  Closing my locker, I turned and swung my arm so that it smacked the phone out of the ham's hands. The phone was fine, but the femayo looked at me with the look of a thousand stolen oreos.  "Oops! Sorry! I guess I didn't realize how much space you take up. Tee hee," I said. Ham was angry but gone when I got back. I had considered that it might follow me onto the floor and try to yell at me but let's be real. If it came out onto the floor it wouldn't be able to delusion itself into thinking it did any work.