The fat who ruined my wedding Okay, well I don’t want to say ruined, since it was still the best day of my life, I got to marry the love of my life, yadda yadda... but let me tell you the story of the fat bitch who made me cry on my wedding day. I’ll start the weekend prior. My in-laws thru me a surprise bachelorette & shower weekend, since my husbands diagnosis and the wedding being crazy fast approaching. It started at paint & sip, my sister in law inviting our closest friends and family.  In stumbles BBW (big, bountiful witch) (she thinks she’s a witch). BBW is a friend of a friend, as wide as it is tall. Maybe 5’ and 300lbs? She wabbles, and can’t walk up stairs, where my party happens to be.  So she comes in lates, stops the party to have our hostess hoist her up the steps, and proceeds to eat my whole veggie tray, the whole time drowning the veggies in ranch, and going on and on about how much she loooovess vegetables you guis. (She didn’t know the name for snap peas tho). Anyway, she pulls me aside to ask me to cover her cost, because she didn’t bring any money because she thought it wouldn’t cost anything. So she asks THE BRIDE to pay for her. And the only reason I did, is because I felt bad for everything my family had done, and didn’t want to give them this burden. But I was FUMING and begging god in my head for this bitch to not be coming to our dinner after. And if that wasn’t enough, she decided she couldn’t handle the attention not being on her, so she started crying her eyes out, having “a massive panic attack” causing all the guests to stop and focus on her, and cater to her needs. Bringing her cookies and drinks.  She did come to dinner. But I sat far enough away that she wouldn’t ask me to pay again. But fatties gonna fat, so of course after the check came, and someone else paid for her meal, she loudly exclaimed “but I wanted dessert! What do you have for desserts?!” Someone else paid. We’re all getting ready to leave. But you’re still going to ask for DESSERT?!? So next, she came to the shower, and much like the wedding, brought no card, no gift, but ate all our food.  But on to the best part. And I. Cannot. Make. This. Shit. Up.  Our wedding was small, in a family friends backyard. I get dressed with my bridesmaids, and walk down the steps to reveal my dress to my father. There, I see her. BBW in some neon hot pink dress, freshly dyed blue hair. Ohno.jpeg.  But I focus on what’s at hand: I’m about to walk down the aisle. I’m so busy freaking out, holding my dad, getting my flowers, etc. that I barely notice this neon pink blob grab a bouquet, and waddle out with my bridesmaids. everybody just stood there, shook. She “marched” out first so nobody could grab her, and I just stood there, mouth agaped. Did this fat bitch really, REALLY just force herself into my wedding?! Like, all my bridesmaids were in the same, blue dress. Did she not realize she was in PINK?! And that I had NEVER asked her?!?! As fuming as I was, tears beginning to form, I’m thankful for my photographer and family friend there to calm me down. But god, if that fat bitch didn’t ruin half of all my beautiful wedding photos.  Hubby afterwards asked me what happened. When I explained, he told me that him and his groomsmen were beyond confused, and apparently she almost tumbled walking down the hill to the ceremony.  I’m still bitter. Fuck fats.