And they keep doing these 5k waddles because they get so much back patting.  I ran in a 10k/5k event and my horrible planet of an aunt attached herself to me like she always does (she thinks if she's seen with me, people will take her seriously when she says she wants to lose weight).  Anyway, I trained really hard for this event and a set a new PR on the 10k.  But all the credit went to my aunt who finished the 5k averaging slower than walking pace.  Good for you, you fat piece of shit, you did something that almost anyone can do.  It is not an accomplishment to walk for over an hour.  She wore her medal all day, and then ate half of a pie in one sitting