Stories of my fat friend Ham Logic: Me: Hey u wanna train? blablabla Fats: No time Me: Bullshit F: I got a life (fuck you fat fuck) Movie: Fats: Hey jurassic world, im gonna go download it and watch it in camera mode Me:Dont downlaod, dont spoil it by watching it in shit quality F:Its okay Me:Have you seen jurassic park 1? F:I never Me: I've never heard of anyone NOT watching jurassic park 1 in a first world country F: Im not a fan thoughts: fuck you Sights: Eliz: when you see serene wave at her Me: we'l be able to see her from a mile away hahahaha Chicken: Me: hey you want some chicken? Fat: ya Me: as expected Dining with hamlet There were a couple of us eating dinner with our ham friend and she was like 'oh dear, i gotta cut down on all these unhealthy stuff and these junk food' all while picking up the nearest soda and gulping it down like a beast. I then said 'oh actually you should do more than just that', and my other friend gave me a kick on the foot. Ham proceeded to ignore me the rest of the night. After lunch at work I was eating with hamlet during work break, mostly talking about her wanting to quit the job. Right after lunch, she decided to go to the nearest 7-11 buying the biggest gulp. I then said 'Are you going to drink all of That?' and she then said 'it can last me the entire day'. I was thinking to myself 'it can probably even last you until tomorrow'. Feigning sickness I went to a girl's place to ask her come gym with me, she was okay with it, i decided to bring ham along but she said she was down with fever and will meet us after gym. I was pretty pissed because i knew it was just an excuse. Later that day, hamlet proceeded to eat sushi with us and even ice cream after. My friend quoted to me 'fatasses are just full of excuses'.. Vocal messaging It was any other ordinary day when ham sent a vocal text to our group chat. She panted while talking, gasped for air, excited, and most of all just overall disgusting. "Oh mah god, gasp, pantatonix heave is coming to town! Do yougasp wanna go?wheeze". In my mind i was thinking 'shit.. go work out you fat f*".. At the end of the day, nobody went.