The bitchy coworker, the snide comment, and the trainer at the gym's blatant shitlording. SO... apparently I have been the topic of conversation of my favorite planet, and I am thrilled. I didn't realize I had gotten under her skin so badly! I was here trying to think of ways to subtlety shitlord her, and I have been doing it already. Feels good man!  I go to the gym and do cardio at lunch, for two reasons: I never took a lunch before and it gets me out of the office. The gym I work out at is wonderfully small and I have never seen more than five people there at once. Unfortunately, that means no locker rooms- they have bathrooms and open cubbies you can stash your stuff in. Rather than bring all my stuff to the gym, I just change at work. We have private bathrooms and it keeps me from having to put on normal clothes all sweaty. OH BOY does that trigger her. Apparently I am "just trying to get attention" and "flaunting myself in front of her". I wear yoga pants and a tank top to the gym... I think it may be time to get some skimpy top and shorts for the summer!  However, the real reason I wanted to post: I was at the gym today. I am yet to see a ham there, so of course my good luck was about to change. This planetary being PARKS IN THE HANDICAPPED SPOT and waddles in, right up to the trainer. Not going to lie, I love listening to these so I pop an earbud out.  Trainer: Did.. did you park in the handicapped spot?  Planet: Yea. I don't want to get too tired!  T: Don't do that again. You are here to work out, walking the extra ten feet won't hurt.  P: I have the placard! I'm allowed! You can't make me move my car! After working out I will be too tired to walk to my car! T: Yep, you are right. Let's get going. On the treadmill!  P: gets on, starts slow walk T: speed it up P: beep beep T: more P: no, that's too fast! I don't want to get tired!  T: But I thought that's why you parked close... so you can get tired and not have far to walk?  I just about died. When I can afford a trainer, I am so using him!