Shitlording the neighbour's fat-ass wife My neighbour is a retired bricklayer. For an older guy, he seems to be in pretty decent shape, and he's always doing something around the house - digging a garden, paving the driveway, laying a stone path - you name it, he does it himself. His wife, on the other hand, is a hamplanet, comparable to Tess Dumpster in both height and girth. She's much younger than him - 10 years at least, but it's hard to tell with hams. They have 2 planetoid daughters, one in her late teens, one in her early twenties (again, hard to guage actual ages with fatties.) The neighbour's wife has a disgusting attitude to match her disgusting body; our houses are on small lots and are close together, so I can always hear her screaming at her husband: "Take out the trash! Let out the dogs!" whatever. I think she throws tantrums too, because I'll hear her screaming, then a "THUD!" so loud MY house will shake. Honestly, I can't stand this woman. She's rude, obnoxious, and has zero class. There's a really nice butcher/deli in my neighbourhood, about a 5 minute walk from home. Since it was a beautiful day and I wanted some tenderloin for dinner, I decided to walk to the butcher. As I'm leaving my house, I can hear the neighbour pig yelling at one of her daughters to hurry up and get ready. I think nothing of it, and walk to the butcher. When I get there, who's in line in front of me at the deli? Fatty and her daughter. I wasn't there long, as I only bought 1 item, but I saw that hammy ordered 2 lbs of what I think was hot pastrami, then barked at the deli clerk, "now I want the same thing, but mild." Like I said, this planet has no class (do ANY of them?) I left before they did, and started my short walk back home. As I'm rounding the corner onto my street, the butter barge and her daughter drive past me. They pull into their driveway and get out of their car just as I'm putting my keys into the lock. Fatty must have realized I walked to and from the deli, so she says to me, almost incredulous, "Did you WALK to the deli? Aren't you pregnant???" I was a caught a bit off guard. Clearly, my husband must have said something to either fatty or her husband about us expecting baby #1. I smiled sheepishly, and said, "yes, I am. But it's a gorgeous day, and the deli's only 5 minutes away. Besides, walking keeps me skinny." She was completely lost for words, and the look on her face was priceless - hard to describe, but somewhere between disdain and jealousy. I just chirped, "see ya!" and let myself inside. TL;DR: Mayo goblin neighbour drives to neighbourhood deli which is less than 5 minutes away on foot. She sees that I walked, and makes a snarky comment. Shitlording ensues.