"after weeks of getting hit on by this burrito hippo, [my friend had] had enough." A few years back, our circle of friends was hit by a beetus infestation.  We were a mixed bunch (lots of ethnicities, genders, and sexual orientations), but never had any >25 bmis in the group.  One of my good buddies, originally from Israel (this point becomes important later in the story), seemed to get the worst of it. The beetus in question, pretty quickly, latched on to my friend, and would follow him around like a lost puppy manatee. Now, my friend was a pretty laid back guy (he was terse with her, though never curt), but after weeks of getting hit on by this burrito hippo, he'd had enough. One night, after yelling at her to leave him the fuck alone, there was a lot of stunned silence. Then, the piggy managed to oink out "why? ...why don't you like me?" My friend, who'd regained his composure at this point, said "Let's just put it this way: I like my women like I like my international borders: well defined." ...and that was the day we got rid of our beetus infestation.  Fee fees were hurt.  Mics were dropped.  Triggers were triggered.  And buttery tears were probably spilled into an extra large pizza, while posting on tubblr.