Ridiculous Fattie So yesterday my friend and I decide to go tubing down our local river. As we neared the end of our run there is a giant obese man holding onto a vine. My friend looks at me and asks me what the man is doing. I say " I don't know, sunbathing?" So we get up closer we see the man is in tears. He yells over, " when you get back can you tell them that I'm drowning? " Incredulous my friend says "you're drowning? And tell who?" Fatty is not happy, he expects a helicopter to come and scoop him up. Eventually once we make our way back to the take out we do see a man looking for the portly fellow, we point him in the right direction to rescue the guy. Moral of the story, don't float down a river if you can't expend the energy to get yourself out of the river.