I remember a good story from a while ago This was 4 years or so ago, but I remembered it recently. I was on a band trip with my school and we had to fly international. I was seated between a pair of saxophonist bros of mine (I play bass guitar), and we were playing cards and shooting the shit before the plane was to take off. NOW just about everyone on this trip was an instrumental musician, except for one particular specimen. We had brought along a circus animal to parade as a side show for our little band tour, or as some would call it: A fat vocalist for one song of the setlist. This little monstrosity, let's call her red, was like a giant baby: She cried more in the three years I had known her than an adult should in their whole lifetime. Now at this time red had entered into a codependent orbit (highschool relationship, but for fats) with another celestial body who also happened to be on this band trip, let's call him wolf. Now mostly everyone had been seated on the plane and was either content with their seats, or did not give a shit because most of us were just gonna nap during the flight. But not red, oh no. You see, red had been seated at the back of the plane, but her beau wolf was seated in the middle. This of course meant that red had been crying ever since she got on the plane (seriously, you're embarrassing the entire school with this shit), and had been trying to find a way to bring her orbit closer to her beloved. Return to me and me saxophone boys, the three of us would actually spend a good part of band making jokes about red and her antics, and we were making such jokes as we waited for the plane to finish boarding. All of a sudden, I hear a thumping sound approaching from behind me on the aisle. I turn to look into the aisle and sure enough, red is standing there red faced with tear marks down her puffy cheeks. "Pugatlas, can you swap seats with me?" she asked me because we had been in a musical the year before and she thought I considered her a friend I guess, I really didn't. Now you must understand that I'm not very good with children, and I don't like to make scenes in public, so I'm at a crossroads in my mind: I could forfeit my seat and avoid further tears, or I could stand my ground and open a new water park while also ending the water crisis with the ensuing torrent. I had never felt time actually freeze before. I looked at red, I looked at my saxophone bros, I looked at the maestro seated across the aisle from me and see him nod his head towards me. Then it dawns on me, just past the band director is the object of NASA's most recent research, wolf himself is on the exact opposite side of the plane and is three rows up. If I give up my spot, not only will I betray my saxophones, not only will I give a fatty what they want, but also she will probably bother someone else to move to bring her closer to her disgusting partner. I turn back to the moon the eclipsed the sun from my eyes, and I replied "I'm sorry no." The beast returned sobbing to its seat. My saxophone bros both let out an audible sigh of relief. One of them turned to me and said "If you had said yes, we would no longer be friends." Later on, the beast made our poor little beta asian flutist, on the other side of the plane, switch seats. But let it be known that on that day the power of bros and shitlords did not fail.