So a mayo barge walks into our stables today... So I'm at the barn where I board my 2 horses, tacking up to ride, when this Large Marge (I'll refer to it as LM) enters and slowly walks over to me. It was huffing and puffing just from going about 25 feet. I was thinking this couldn't be about riding lessons - maybe it was lost or something?  LM said it has loved horses it's whole life and wanted to know how much lessons cost?  She was easily over 270 pounds. It was hard for me not to say "are you for real?" There is no way she's getting on one of the school horses. So she proceeds to tell me she spoke to the barn manager who was "very warm and welcoming."  Uh, ok. Everyone at our barn is a serious athlete and we compete in jumping and eventing.  We are shitlords, as are most riders. There is no way to be fat and balance properly on a horse. Manager is the biggest shitlord of all.  So I go into the office and call barn manager, describing LM in detail. She laughs and says "tell her she'll have to get into condition first!" So I go back out to LM and had the absolute pleasure of telling her in detail about how she'd have to work out at a gym with a trainer for at least a year, provided she was seriously losing weight the whole time and we'll talk.  The crestfallen look was so satisfying. It never thought it might have to DO something in order to ride. Yeah, we WORK at what we do. It's not a pony ride, loser.