Nick Holliday, aka Mr. Tess Dumpster: I'm on to you, buddy. This guy comes up pretty often around here, sometimes for being the biggest hipster douche ever, but mostly for marrying the fattest, grossest woman in the world. Mostly it's shitlords wondering what the hell is wrong with the guy - what could his deal possibly be? It was right in front of us the whole time. Guys. He's her life insurance beneficiary. It's the long con. Or medium-length, by the looks of her. That's GOT to be it.  What a price to pay, though. That's deep cover. If this guy isn't just actually a sexually perverted fat fetishist, then he's the most dedicated con man ever.