My Fat Housemate Hey guys, I don't usually complain about people around me, but I've been pushed over the edge today - plus I'm drunk and blasting out my assignments. I live in assigned housing (work related) with three other people, I only know two of them: the third moved in with his partner and technically still occupies the property, so there are only three of us in the house total. The housing is pretty much set up so I live on one side with one guy and the other guy lives on the other side with a kitchen and bathroom in between. So, the guy on my side is a pretty normal guy, cool to live with and hang out with - we party a lot and gym a lot together, his friends are mine and mine are his and we share everything (besides his partner!), we'll call him Shitlord. But the guy on the other side is one of the biggest motherfuckers I have ever met. Usually I leave him be because I don't see him much, but he has a bad habit of not doing the dishes. He'll leave food - both cooked and uncooked - out for days, leave pots and pans dirty and leave plates and cups everywhere. Myself and Shitlord clean up after ourselves, but after a few days we give up, because he leaves all his shit out. Shitlord and I may leave a few plates and cups dirty for a day or two but we wash and use the same ones. We usually say fuck it and clean the whole kitchen after a week until he trashes it again. It got to the point where Shitlord and I didn't eat at home. This is what pushed me over the edge: A few days ago, Shitlord told me he was having people over for dinner, and decided to ask Fat Cunt to clean up since it was his mess, and he said yes, but the day before it was still trashed, so Shitlord asked him that day and he said "no problem". But what do you fucking know? The dishes were still there, the kitchen was a fucking mess. So today Shitlord, myself, and Shitlord's partner cleaned the fuck out of the kitchen for the people to come over, we had to throw out one of my pans because he cooked stew in it and left it there.  When Fat Cunt came home today, Shitlord confronted him, and I followed to listen. Fat Cunt starts getting all defensive and aggressive and starts threatening Shitlord, calling Shitlord's girlfriend a "slave" for her helping to clean and then shifts the blame on me, saying it was my mess because I left a pan on the stove top - which was clean - and accused me of leaving shitstains on the toilet (good joke - I'm paranoid af, I clean it each time) and accusing me of leaving rubbish out (which was somewhat true, we had a few garbage bags in the corner, but the majority of the rubbish was his) and leaving food in the fridge (all I had was some ham, cheese and butter), and finally accused me of drawing cocks all over the house (which was his mates and we spoke to him the day after that happened and he admitted responsibility and said he would clean it  - guess what). He started getting aggressive and swearing at me, so I started swearing back, which caused him to lunge at me, which I dodged and backed off, while securing a long pole (holy fuck have you ever had a fat cunt try attack you, what the fuck).  Tonight he started talking shit about me and Shitlord on Facebook. I'm presenting it to our Landlord tomorrow - he's on final warnings for attacking our previous housemate. I kind of wish he hit me so I could have gone to the cops. Sorry about the rant and the wall, I had to get this off my chest.