You beautiful, glorious shitlady! I would kiss you if I wasn't married. Had another fun one with Cookie boy today.  A female customer came in needing 4 group 31 batteries.  She was about 5' and small framed.  These are Commercial batteries that are around 40-50 lbs apiece.  For some reason, batteries in our store are kept at the back.  It's about a hundred foot walk.  Cookie boy made 4 trips to the back. I was helping another customer find a fuel filter for a tractor.  By his 2nd trip, his face was beet red.  By the 3rd trip, sweat was coming off his face in rivers.  I'm not exaggerating when I say he was dripping on the floor. Finally, wheezing and grunting, he brought up the 4th battery while I was finishing the tractor customer.  She was trying hard not to laugh at him as she paid.  He looked so pathetic.  I grabbed 2 batteries and told him to grab another. I know he was planning on making her cart all 4 batteries out the door.  I was also hoping that one more would push him over the edge into cardiac arrest.  He shot me a glare filled by the hatred of a thousand angry donuts.  She was good looking, and he wanted her to have to make multiple trips so he could see her more.  She grabbed 2 batteries and said  "No thanks.  I don't want to be responsible for him having a stroke."  She managed to keep her back straight, and carried both out the door.  Not a bad feat considering she probably weighed less than or at most equal to the two batteries. He was still wheezing when I got back in.  He didn't say a word to me the rest of the day.  Thank you,Unkown Shitlady for the glorious silence. As an added bonus, he has reduced his hours to part time, "Since the owner won't let me have a stool to sit on so I can rest.  I just can't work that many hours a week, unless I can rest from time to time." BTW, what is it about deathfats and the sweat?  This guy sweats enough that he keeps a (foul smelling) towel on him at all times.  He'll sweat like that just standing at the counter.