Kunganqandwa njani ukukhulelwa kwamantombazana afikisayo

vukuzenzele unnamed

Zikhona iindle la zokunqanda ukukhulelwa kwamantombazana afikisayo, eziquka ukukhetha ukungabelani ngesondo ude ube utshatile okanye ukulungele ukuba naba ntwana.
Abanye abantu bacinga ukuzila ukwabela-na ngesondo (ukukhetha ukungabelani ngesondo ude ube utshatile) yindlela yakudala, ngelixa abanye becinga ukuba yeyona ndle-la ilungileyo yokuziphatha. Amantombazana afikisayo, ngoko ke, kufuneka azithathele ngokwawo isigqibo.Uninzi lwabantu alufu-ni kulinda lude lutshate phambi kokuba lwabelane ngesondo. Kwakhona alu-funi kungxama ukwenza nantoni na luze lwenze iimpazamo ezinkulu. Nga-manye amaxesha bathatha isigqibo sokucinga ukuba yeyona nto ingcono uku-libazisa ukuzibandakanya kwezesondo bade babe badala ngokwaneleyo,  futhi bangabantu abayaziyo into abayifunayo, umntu athandane nomntu omnye aqinisekileyo ngaye kwaye abe uyaphangela.Ukuba ukhetha ukuzila okanye ukulibazisa ukwabelana ngesondo, zikhona ezinye izinto onokuzenza ukuzikhusela:
• Bakhethe ngononophelo abahlobo bakho. Abahlobo kufuneka bakuqwenelele okukulungeleyo kwaye kufuneka basihloniphe isigqibo sakho sokunga belani ngesondo.• Lumkela ukuzifaka  kwiimeko ezingakhuselekanga, njengabahlobo abasela utywala okanye abasebenzisa iziyobisi kuba oku kungakhokelela ekubeni kwabelanwe ngesondo ngokungakhuselekanga.• Walumkele amaqabane athi ukuba uyawathanda uza kulala nawo.• Mamela uze ufunde kwabo bathe bakhulelwa besaqala ukufikisa. Bayazazi ii mpazamo kunye nezithi ntelo.• Mamela uze ufunde kubazali bakho ngamava obomi.
Ukuba ugqiba kweloku-ba ukuzila ukwabelana ngesondo okanye ukuliba-zisa ukwabelana ngesondo ayisosigqibo sikulungeleyo kwaye awufuni kulinda, thatha ixesha ufunde malunga nokhuseleko, kuquka izithinteli-kukhulelwa, ezikukusebenzisa indlela ethile (izixhobo ezifana nekhondomu okanye iipilisi) zokunqanda ukukhulelwa.Zininzi izithinte-li-kukhulelwa ezisebenza ngeendlela ezahlukileyo, kodwa zonke zenzelwe ukunqanda ukukhulelwa. Ziquka izithinteli-kukhule-lwa eziselwayo, ezaziwa ngokuba ‘yipilisi’; izithinteli-kukhulelwa eziyinaliti; kunye neekhondomu zamadoda nezabafazi.
Ndingenza ntoni ukuba ndikhulelwe?Ukuba ucinga ukuba ukhulelwe, hamba nomntu omthembayo uye kwikliniki ekufuphi uyokwenza uvavanyo lokukhulelwa.Ukuhlukuhla (ukunikezelwa kwenkathalelo kosana olungekazalwa) kubalule-kile kwaye amaxa amaninzi kuqala kwiiveki ezisibhozo ukhulelwe. Ikliniki ekufutshane nawe ingakunceda xa ufuna ukuya kuhlukuhla futhi umsebenzi wenkathalelo yezempilo ongunompilo wakho angakunce-disa ukwenza isicwangciso esikufaneleyo wena nosana lwakho.Ukuba ukhulelwe,  kubalulekile ukuba utye ukutya okusempilweni okunezondlo, uzivocavoce, ulale ngokwaneleyo kwaye ungazisebenzisi iziyobisi nokusela notywala.
*Olu lwazi lukhutshwe liSebe lezeMpilo laKwaZulu-Natala.
UKUKHULELWA USAQALA ukufikisa kuza kuba negalelo kubomi bakho bonke, kodwa zikhona iindlela zokuzigcina ukhuselekile ekukhulelweni okungacwangciswanga.