Beep
Beep
Beep
Beep
Beep
Beep
I'm Patrick Hitzig
I'm Patrick Hitzig, a highly trained technician in a very dangerous field
where you have to protect yourself and watch your back at all times
On average, we get about 100 patrons an hour
Do not underestimate these people
The behavior of these strangers can be very unpredictable
Beep
Other than the fear-mongering media, I don't know why these well-meaning people install this device here
According to the employee handbook, when you encounter a potential crisis or your life is threatened, blah, blah, blah, you can more or less just press this panic button
All you need to be able to deal with a potential crisis is common sense
Checking out? I'll just need an ID
I don't have it now
If you don't have an ID, then I can't check books out to you
But you can say you're in a library and read them
We close at 9 o'clock p.m.
Do you like your jacket? Did you get that at Wilson's?
That was so cool, man. That dude was going to knock you out
Not really
Weren't you scared?
He's harmless
Oh, come on
Human beings get into a panic state very easily
This little red sedative is all they need to stay calm in their daily lives
Especially when they have to face things that don't fall into their favorite categories
I don't know
Okay
Catalog, label, and judge
And then either find your favorites or run away from anything that's strange or unknown
Who really wants to read the ecological value of Selencheron, of Antarctica anyway?
I'm not just talking about our behavior towards books
This human instinct runs through a vein so much so that we have to practice it on our own kind
Frankly, I find it pathetic
This is the reason why we have racist, sexist, nationalist, regionalist, agist, zodiac sinus
And trust me, I am not making this up
By the way, I am an elitist
Jesus
How long have you been here?
I'm dying. How long have you been here a month?
Do you have a good board?
I have loads of fun
How?
You're telling weirdos I can't repay just for copies?
See that guy?
He's gonna check out a geography textbook for his girlfriend
He's been standing there and keeps on texting
Because he can't find what she needs
How do you know it's for his girlfriend?
Would you look like that if you couldn't find a book on the how to cook Japanese udon noodle for your mom?
Besides, there's a photo of her on his phone
And see that woman?
She only asks for help
She won't know where to find the books on the re-employment
Hi
Do you have any books on step-by-step job searches?
Yeah, yeah, hold on
How did you know?
How did you know?
How did you know?
That was amazing
You should go on tour or audition for Ellen or America's Got Talent
For you?
I'd be on TV
Check that out
See his briefcase?
Yeah
Troubleshooting for Max
Microsoft for Dummies
He's not going to wait any longer
What do you mean?
He's been here since 9 o'clock in the morning
He hasn't checked anything out
He just sits there with that case
Waiting
Shaking
Sweating
Yeah
It's time
I don't get it
It is time
What?
He's not coming back
What's going on? Any insights?
What do you think is going on?
What are you talking about?
Focus
What do you think?
Like that?
Isn't it kind of obvious?
Do you hear something?
Something's wrong
I don't know
Do you hear it?
Definitely wrong, man
Do you still want to be on TV?
You're really freaking me out
Because o'clock, it is ticking
What the fuck? What should we do?
Well, you know it happens
And we have an employee handbook
You can actually figure out how to deal with the situation
In the employee handbook
It's going to contain everything you want
Second floor
Second floor
Choppers
The library is under attack
Employees must
Employees must
Employees must
As I said, human beings are easily frightened
Is this thing working?
You are feeling better?
Yes, yes, I'm fine
I'm so sorry, this was so awkward
Actually, my wife didn't want to throw the curry away from yesterday
Where is everybody?
We had a fire drill
It's just a standard procedure
And the library actually needs to be clear in three minutes
So I'm afraid you'll have to leave
Okay, thank you
And that is how it's done
Ellen, I'm your biggest fan
Please, choose me
Please
Please
Please
Please
Please
Please
Please
