I didn't know what to do, everything just hit me all at once and the pills were sitting
there.
I don't know how many I took.
My name is Lauren and this is my story.
My dad had told us one night that he had lost his job again.
My parents were going to get a divorce and shortly after that he left town and it felt
like he was just completely out of my life and I realized I didn't have a father figure
in my life anymore and it just got harder and harder from there.
And there's this boy I met.
He talking into drinking for the first time.
I got drunk.
I do remember waking up the next morning and I was next to the boy I had met that night.
It was scary because I had never imagined it like that.
It was Lauren lost her virginity to a guy she didn't know.
And from then on I can't tell you how many names I got called.
I would take vodka coffee in the first period.
I didn't want to have to be sober.
The more I was drunk the more I didn't realize what people were saying about me.
It was all fun and games.
So that went on for a while.
I started cutting again when people would say something about me and the way they would
look at me and then he sent me like a seven page text telling me that I was worthless.
After I got that text I got it around 1am and then 3am my mom was taking me to the hospital
because I had taken a whole bottle of extra strength pills.
The turning point in my life was the day that I got invited to a youth revival at Life Center
called Revive and everything he said it was just like yes, yes Jesus will still love me
because of my secrets and my knees were buckling, my hands were shaking and I started crying
like tears dripping down my face and I was like alright here I am take me now and I'm
ready to live your life.
I do my PBJ, I go to church and I bring a lot of people with me and they say that they
can't believe that this happened.
I'm referred to as a Bible Thumper now which I never thought I liked but I love when people
say that.
I can't stop smiling, I smile at the most random things now.
Your finger seems so much better.
I have never felt more alive.
I love life now and look back on my past as such a beautiful struggle.
I have not cut myself for a full year now.
My journey to Jesus would not have been so impacting if I had not first hand experienced
the same in grace of God and the forgiveness I received at the foot of the cross.
I love Jesus.
