Rugol Yong
Hello... I'm Doug Ryan, i'm a media lecturer at Brighton University
Okay, triumph
When I say happiness, what do you think of personally?
Rydych chi'nspeaking ar y gorau, ar y gyd- cleared o'r éocaladso.
DC o outcomes a amser'.
Iodd i'w gwisioi'r mightf内sh o remindio yn jadw'r gweithio ar gyfer y gyrdoedd.
Labour claimed that things
something that is dependent on
events or circumstances around me
at that moment in time
whereas contentments are a much deeper thing
it's not like a smiley thing necessarily
it's a sort of much deeper emotion
Why?
Do you think memories can be used to improve your mood?
Mircaidwch pob ddigon?
Do you think memories can be used to improve your mood?
That's alright Llywy, it's fine.
Do you think memories can be used to improve happiness?
Yeah, just improve your mood.
And then, anything bad or sad about other memories?
Is mae ychydig yn gallu maes yn Ofus ar photography neu whithirx, y llwn nhw'n gwybod?
Yn chwarae Aber publication Diwy Boo Youngr
Ym 10 ffrind sydd y gweld hynny?
Fe chaf allan
yn gweld cofn am ymarfin
So mae gennell Madrid yn siar lluniaid
ham Yn chweiniad lluniaid
beth oedd y flodいうこと yng nglu
''Gistalt''.
Mae hynny i'r unwilling parsley
ή nhw ride hwnnw'n galain
i chi i'w chlaedr i'w ddech Jeong, Lemgu Ogreil.
Ond yn rhan, mae chi bod ni'n bydd yn cerdd datblygiadや maes Motog patterns
pan dweud d Iniwysr y le, Au Cadurol, ac kim eich gondffetydu dwysig perihemys
a erdw i ddelidaeth hefyd y map, a mae'n dadd yn nid adagsu erdekst i
ll ymgyrch yn bryd i ll靺ion cerddorol rych yma,
â chd lif.
A'r NLPLot yng nghyrch o liciojach bells oniwlog
yn ro woeith ar dynamine
Spec.
yn y lle o'r fagradd rhyw i.
Nw efallai ganlo fath o fil wrth g insulting.
Mae hwn yn Y Llyfrg��
i ddechrau hwnna.
Hefyd siad y dyreoli hwnna hwnna o'r hoffod i.
Yn長 Till mwyn i.
Yn'r llan dros fynd roeddaeth sy'n wil mwydynauwersydd eu jaesg core Cream.
G rational tired yma.
Acwn i syniad roedd y brincaid yma, dweud am fathrung.
Dwi'n ddau gwylio credu'r d jewel.
Ond mae y bod hi'n dweud rydym i hwnna dormynion.
Mae'r angar penderluo o'u pa fechัn caang.
Gade o, mae'n gawiawn nid daud o.
Why would you remember that?
But it re-triggered that memory, which in this instance was an unhappy memory.
But he doesn't have no idea why he's unhappy, so he's just offered him a drink.
So I think there's a whole another layer of...
I think we're all absolutely riddled with anchors like that,
and we have no idea why when somebody says,
Do you want a cup of tea, lovey, or something,
that you're instantly happy or sad or something,
just because somebody said something.
So I don't just think it's the link between memory and happiness.
I think it's that our emotions are triggered by a whole series of anchors
that have been set in our subconscious quite often at a very early age,
that we've absolutely no idea what they are.
And we're all triggered left, right, and centre in happy, unhappy, or neutral ways.
But the art of life is to be able to at least recognise,
I feel like that when somebody does that,
and it's like being a detective and working out.
And then if you can work it out, what the NLP lot,
and I think the Gestalt Lot say is,
if you recognise you've got an anchor,
the only way to change it is you either dissolve it or replace it.
So then you work at re-triggering that this gets attached to something else.
So it overwrites that trigger of that particular memory,
or you work at dissolving it and make it go away.
Well, that's a whole other story,
but I don't know what else to do with your question.
It was, can memories be used to improve your mood?
Yeah, they can.
Another NLP thing from neuro-linguistic programming is
they're very into, you can create a state.
So if I want to be playful and happy,
then I go back in time to a time where I can remember feeling playful and happy.
So I might have to go back to five or six or something like that.
And if I can then put myself into my own body in my memory, playful and happy,
all right, I was on the park, I was climbing trees, I was seven or eight.
I had my mates around me, we were playing a bit of football,
we didn't really care what we were doing, we were playful and happy.
What did that look like? What did it smell like?
What did it feel like? What did it taste like?
If I can get those memories back into my body,
I will have that experience of being playful and happy now.
I can make it up, that emotion, by remembering those things.
That's quite interesting.
I mean, not many people try that, but it is amazing.
We actually go through it, and we did this exercise where you imagine circles on the floor,
and so you'd stand in an imaginary circle until you got playful and happy,
but it was actually playful and curious, or happy, or tenacious,
like not letting go of something.
So you'd stand in the circle, your imaginary circle,
until you'd got a memory that you could feel it, touch it, smell it,
and then you'd start hopping through these circles really quickly.
I am playful and curious, I am happy, and it's amazing.
You can create that in your body, it's completely real.
It's a bit of a fake it so you make it thing,
but it's a real experience of having that emotion, just through remembering,
but remembering it with all of your senses.
Do you think happiness can be a choice, or do you think that it's just a sprung of joy?
Do you think you can choose to be happy?
Yeah, I do, and it's a bit of a contentious issue, this,
because it blurs into health as a function of consciousness.
It gets a bit tricky when you start saying,
well, what about people who have got cancer?
Have they made it up? Is it psychosomatic?
That isn't what I'm saying.
I do think that attitude, the way that you,
the attitude with which you approach something,
affects your experience of that,
so effectively you create your own reality by your own thoughts.
I do think that.
Do you feel memories have made you who you are?
So, for example, if bad memories have happened.
Have they what?
Have made who you are?
If it doesn't kill you, it makes you stronger and happy memories.
Do you feel it's made who you are now?
Okay, there's different levels for this one.
Do I think that who I am is made up of my memories?
That is a question that I could take on a lot of different levels.
Who I think I am is, I've got personality.
I've got what they would call in a lot of personal development circles,
a programme, so you become the late person,
or the angry person, or the spacey person,
or the wacky person, or those kind of things
tend to come out of our experiences when we're younger.
School, parents, media, friends,
those kind of influences form a big part of who we are.
Before seven, most of our character personality is formed before we're seven,
and then most people endlessly live out that for the rest of their lives
unless they decide to become more conscious about it.
So, for example, my mum and dad split up when I was five.
I went to three separate infant schools in the space of a year
in three different countries, Scotland, Wales and then England.
That was very formative for me, so I could say
what I learnt at that time of my life, around five or six,
was that everybody that I get close to is suddenly taken away.
Intimacy is always followed by abandonment,
or everything's just changed without me having any control over it,
so that I've lived a lot of my life around...
I wouldn't really say it's a memory,
but those series of events were definitely very formative in my life,
and still are.
Now, is that who I am? I don't think it is who I am.
That's become part of the part of who I am,
but that's not getting into spirit or soul.
That's not getting into what the difference between your ego is
and the other aspects of your character.
That's complicated.
There's entire realms of psychology about the different aspects of who we are
in philosophy and religion as well,
but I do think on an everyday level,
memories or formative events in our lives
do quite often make a big part of who we are,
but it is possible to reconfigure that,
and that's why you have psychology and counselling
and it's not written in stone.
You can do anything with anything.
It's like I was a lazy, late person,
but what I did is I flicked it to the opposite
so that then I could become a teacher
who can ask other people not to be that,
because I've worked on it.
It's like people who've had a drug habit.
If they can overcome that,
then they become very useful to help other people,
so I was you, I know what it's like to be like that,
and if you just do this,
you can be in a different place with it
and that becomes useful.
When you get back over your life,
would you change any of the bad memories for good memories?
Well, that's a really value laden question, isn't it?
Who decides what's good or bad?
So, you know, somebody could win a million pounds,
that seems like a good event.
If what happens six months later is that that person
no longer knows whether anybody likes them
for who they really are
and think all of their friends don't like them because they've got money,
then that willing a million pounds
could turn into an unhappy event.
I mean, there's just an event.
Whether it's good, bad or neutral,
I do think is a choice.
So I could say my parents splitting up at five was a bad event.
Me going to three infant schools in the space of a year
was very disruptive and a bad event.
But then when I look at what I've done with that in my life,
I think, well, I am by and large quite pleased with what I've done with it.
So I think you can do anything with anything.
You can turn being the poorest person in the world
into the bottom of the pile
into something very transformative,
or you can become a victim.
I mean, it's complicated, all this stuff,
but I come from the point of view that
I can change seeing an event as a bad event
and an unhappy thing in my life.
I can change that in the now into something constructive or useful.
I don't know. That's advanced.
What would you consider to be the main aspects of other people's happiness?
So when you look at other people,
what would you say most people find their happiness?
Well, this is my 21st year of teaching.
When I ask people what they want,
pretty much say the same things they want.
Enough money, a job that they like,
a home that they want to go home to,
and a partner, maybe kids, family, social life.
It seems to me that most people want very similar things
of what they think is going to make them happy.
My experience is whatever you think you want,
when you get it, it lasts about two weeks before it wears off,
and then you just want something else.
So I think that's the difference between happiness and contentment.
Happiness is a very fickle thing, comes and goes very easily.
So you want a nice posh, flash car, you save up your money,
or you do what you need to get it,
and you get in the car and drive around,
and then within probably a few weeks,
you're probably thinking about something else.
I think it's very fickle happiness.
Whereas contentment, if I was to die tomorrow,
I would feel content that, for example, in my job,
that I feel like I've helped a lot of people
along the way to doing what they want to do in their life,
whatever that might be for them.
So I feel content about that,
but it's not like I wake up in the morning feeling happy about it,
but if I ask myself, I might content with what I do in my professional life,
yeah, I am, I might content with myself as a father, yeah, I am.
And that's more of a constant, deeper level.
Am I happy with the way that I lead my life on a day-to-day basis?
No, I'm not always, because there's always something to work on
that's a bit of a drag.
There seems to be always something, whatever I get in place,
there's always something.
But then people say, well, you can't have everything, so why can't you?
And if you do have everything, whatever that is,
maybe there's a whole other layer that opens up.
Some people say you have to handle your survival stuff
to be able to work on your spiritual development.
So it's only at the point when you've got your bills paid
and all that survival stuff handled
that you can kind of do something else.
As long as you're still chasing your tail to pay the rent
or put food on the table, it's very distracting to a higher purpose,
but maybe that's another story in at the time.
