When I look at the new trilogy of Star Wars, I don't really think, you know, I think about
things that are more practical or I wonder about things that other people don't think
about.
Like, where does Rey take a shit on, on her island, on Jakku?
Like, before Finn picked her up, like, where did she just go take a, a fat ass dump?
Was it like, did she have like a little poo pile in her, in her starship?
Home?
Whatever the fuck that thing was?
Or maybe, like, um, no, it was an AT-AT.
But maybe, um, maybe she just like had like a little, a little box outside in the sand
and she just like took a shit in there, like, and just kind of piled it up and we only just,
and rubbed some dirt on it, but that's kind of fucking nasty, I mean, what, what did she
wipe with?
Did she just wipe with her fucking hands?
I mean, did she just wipe it off?
Or maybe, maybe she just has like a really shitty asshole and she's just rolling around
with that all day and, and that's pretty fucking kind of gross when you think about it.
I mean, like, she's probably got like rashes all over her legs and, and like, and, and
she probably doesn't have like anything to shave with, at least I imagine that maybe
I'm wrong, but she looks kind of poor, so maybe she just has a, has like a really hairy
asshole and, and maybe she's got like a bunch of shit clumps in there and to just like,
and when she walks, they're kind of like slapping back and forth on her legs.
It's pretty fucking nasty to think about poor, poor girl, I guess.
And what happens when she menstruates, like, out there?
Do they have like alien tampons?
I'm not really sure how that would work.
They do, do you even have like periods in the Star Wars universe or maybe like, or maybe
just the aliens have them, or maybe it's not even alien females, like, what if the, what
if the big fuck that like gives her food and shit, what if he has periods, I'd be, I'd
be pretty fucking kind of nasty, uh, it'd be, it'd be kind of gross to think about.
And speaking of shit, what does Chewie do, like, he's, he's really long and hairy all
over, so how does he take his shit without it getting like up in his ass hairs?
I mean, like maybe he just like rips him out, but that's got to be really fucking painful.
I imagine he probably doesn't take many showers, I don't know, maybe he does, but he looks
like a nasty, you know, fuck to me, so, anyway, that's, that's that.
Does anybody else get the impression that Rey is like, you know, really, really mean?
Like, um, when she encounters Finn, and she just like, be the living fuck out of him because
this fucking stupid scrap he, BB-8, you know, told her that, that he stole like, what if,
what if this little piece of shit was lying?
You know, what if, what if his like circuitry was all fucked up and he's like, oh, you know,
you know, fuck that black guy over there, he's still, they steal everything, you know,
what if he's just like a real racist piece of shit, he's like, you know, fucking just
beat him up, whatever, you're white, you can do it, you know, I mean, I just, I kind of
get that feeling, like she's just female ass wipe of, of the Star Wars universe, and,
and there's never really been anybody like that, I mean, Princess Leia was, she's, she's
more just like a, like a tough character, like, like really, um, ah, she, she had more
authority, uh, you know, she, she was not mean, but just a, you know, tough individual
and raised just that fucking piece of shit, good lord, who would ever, like, if I saw her
like, dying on the ground, I'd say, fuck, good luck lady, you know, I'll, I'll see you
later, yeah, that's probably about all I do for her, what else, so when they start off
on Rey's character, like, she's on the desert island, and she's just kind of, uh, rolling
around on like, like her scooter, or whatever the Star Wars equivalent of the scooter is,
and she's collecting a bunch of shit to, you know, just like sell off and eat, I guess
they're expecting us to feel bad for her, but I never, I never really felt bad for her,
I mean, like, you know, she's like super hot, and, and, you know, and, and she's, she doesn't
look like she's starving, she looks like she's like just fine, like a normal human being,
so I mean, it's like fucking Africa, you know, calling, you're not fucking starving, bitch,
get over it, yeah, I just don't, I can't feel too bad for her, you know, and ooh, she's,
she's in the desert, ooh, oh, I've been in a fucking desert for the last seven fucking
years, I don't, I don't care, you know, there's, there's, you know, Arabian people, they, they
live in a desert the whole time, and they're, they're cool with it, I think, I don't know,
I think they do get out a lot to like do vacations and stuff, but that's, that's neither here
nor there, but, um, yeah, she's, um, she's kind of strikes me as like a spoiled brat,
like, like, you know, fucking, fuck you lady, I feel like I'm fucking slaving away all the
time, but I got to fucking eat, and so do you, so you should earn your fucking food,
you dumb bitch, you know, stupid bitch, so I, I wasn't really a, a big fan of how, uh,
you know, during the, the movie, Ray would open her eyes the whole time, it's like, like
she, she just had these fucking huge bug eyes, like she was super, like, uh, shocked or,
or fucking paranoid about shit all the time, and it's like, okay lady, you, you could try
closing your fucking eyes sometime soon, you know, it's, it's kind of creeping me out, I bet it probably
creeped out the audience too, like on some subconscious level, like, wow, you know, this,
this bitch is probably, but, oh god, damn, all right, but, um, so, this thing's like shit,
but I guess it is kind of shit, but anyway, um, so, she always like sucks up the Han a lot,
you know, going, going back to Ray, she sucked up the Han way too much, she liked to, you know,
just like, kiss his ass all the time, like, oh, you're the, you're the guy you, uh, 21 parsecs,
and he's like, no bitch, I ran it motherfucking 12 parsecs, the Kessel Run fucking hoe, and, you
know, and she's just like, oh fuck, you know, maybe I got that wrong, so maybe I should kiss his
ass more to make up for it, and then she tries to like, butt her way onto the fucking Millennium
Falcon and like, take it over and shit, she's like thinking like, oh, maybe if I become like,
one of his crew, and then like, he dies, which is gonna happen in like, five years, or like,
really, she didn't know it, but like, three days, she'd be like, oh yeah, no, I'm the motherfucking
captain, bitch, I got the motherfucking Millennium Falcon, bitch, and I just, I couldn't, I couldn't
take that, nobody, but Han is the captain of the Millennium, well, I guess she is technically now,
because she did kick it, and she was a part, man, that fucking bitch, she did come back around to
become the captain of Millennium Falcon, that really fucking irritates me now, I just realized
that, I thought, at the time it was more like, I guess it's more like Chewy's shit now, I, you know
what, to be honest, I think it's Chewy's shit now, Chewy's, Chewy's the motherfucking captain, you know,
he's at the helm, he's like, oh yeah, this is my fucking gig, and you know, now he's got this weird,
oh, what the fuck that thing is, it's like a rabbit parakeet thing, it's a little bit strange,
yeah, but I get that we're supposed to feel bad for Rey, you know, that she was, you know,
dropped off as a kid on, on Jakku, and you know, it's, it's usually not a good thing to do, but
you know, you, sometimes you gotta think of it from the parent's perspective, you know, we really
don't know what, what they're, you know, what they're about to do, you know, maybe they're just like,
hey, you know, we're about to go to fucking Space Vegas, and this little shithead is, you know,
kind of holding this down, you know, like, like, if you want to go to Space Vegas, you can't go
with a kid, it's, it's just not going to fucking happen, you know, you can't, you can't possibly
do as many drugs, or fucking party as hard, it's, you know, I mean, and, and you won't have as much
money to fucking blow, because instead of blowing it on fucking, you know, the, the Blackjack table,
you gotta put fucking food in your kid's mouth and shit, you might as well just shove fucking
Jackson's in there, in her mouth. So, I mean, at the end of the day, it's understandable that
just like, you know what, a, a shit fuck, you gotta, you gotta stay here, you know, and, um,
and maybe they got something with Dude on the side, where he's like, all right, I'll cut you like
20%, you know, of everything she makes, you know, which, you know, probably isn't a whole lot,
but it's still 20%, you know, it's, it's, uh, and to be honest with you, the, you know, Ray was a
really ugly fucking little kid and shit, you know, like, like, she looked like she was like,
fucking fucked up, like, or something, you know, like, like a genetic defect. So, maybe the parents
like, all right, you know, maybe we'll just dump her off and try again with another one. And it's,
it's possible, you know, it's, if Space Vegas is not answer A, then this is probably answer B,
you know, or it could be both of them kind of conjunction. You know, sometimes you just gotta
dump your child rejects off on desert planets. It's, um, you know, just, it's a normal part of life.
So I kind of get the feeling that Ray is like a hoe for show. Like, she, she kind of plays off,
like, like she just, like she just hop on anybody's dick, you know, if it was like Finn or, or Poe,
if she ever met him, or, or fucking Snoke or like, or, you know, even Adam Driver, whose
name in the movie is Kylo Ren. And, um, maybe she has like daddy issues. Maybe she's like all about
Luke, because she's like, yeah, I want you to be my daddy. Will you be my daddy? Uh, and he's like,
um, fuck, I guess. And then they're like, they're gonna get it on at eight. Yeah, I mean, like,
that'll be a way to switch up episode eight, which is to like, just be completely, you know,
fucking off the wall. Like, like, yeah, you know, this is, this is kind of crazy and shit. Like,
I do do something different. I have all the main characters die and then have all the extras,
like doing coke off of like Hooker's butt cheeks and shit. That'd be, that'd be a way to switch up
episode eight. Just like, you know, Wolf, Wolf of Star Wars, you know, just fucking off the wall,
you know, like, you know, eating ass and doing coke, I think is definitely the way that episode
eight should go. It would, it would shake up the movie industry, whether that's a good thing or a
bad thing remains to be seen. But I, it's, it would be, it'd be unique. It'd be unique. But, but going
back to Ray, she definitely has the daddy issues. Like, she, she's all about, like, Han at first,
like, God, give me that fucking, I want some old dick. And then Luke came along. Well, actually,
he died. Han died. And then she's like, fuck, man, I can't, I can't have any more old man penis.
But then she's like, oh, fuck, I remember, you know, Luke is, Luke is still around. And, and he'd
be like really old right about now. So maybe I could still get some old man penis up in my young
snatch. So she's like, fuck it, let's do this thing. And then Luke's like, my paddle on,
you were too young for this old, giant penis. Because, you know, it's, it's probably going
to be huge. I mean, he's like the fucking, you know, the most powerful Star Wars character in
existence ever. So obviously, he's going to have the biggest dick, you know, just they go hand in
hand. But yeah, well, where was I going with that? I think at the end of the day, Ray is a old man
penis craver. That's, that's where I was going with that. So the last point I really want to make
our last observation is why does Ray run like a linebacker? Or like she's just like this, like a
stiff fucking sack of pussy meat. And she just just runs like she's got like a fucking robot,
like she's got robot legs or a whole robot body. And, you know, it's, it's a little bit weird and
uncomfortable for me. She looks like if somebody would walk in front of her, they would get
fucking run over like she's just a running fridge. That's what she reminds me of a fucking
a sprinting fridge. It's a, it's a, it's a strange sight to behold. And that's, that's really the
all I really have to say. As far as Ray goes, she seems to be a, a deep and nuanced character.
You know, she was who fuck was the director of JJ Abrams. He really seems like he took a great
detail to it of attention or he seemed to take great detail to attention. What the fuck? He seemed
to have a great detail for God damn it. He seemed to have a great attention for detail when he,
when he went over Ray and assembling her character and into the storyline of the
greater Star Wars universe. So I hope you have a, you know, a great day. And if you'd like to,
you know, discuss below in the comments, I'd, I'd like to discuss some more Star Wars things
with you guys. Okay. Take it easy.
