On Twitter. On Twitter? I didn't even talk to you on Twitter! Is that what they doing now on the streets?
I mean, whatever happened to a phone call, a text, or something old fashioned like an email?
I mean, everybody told me it was evil, can't it be?
But listen, you need to shut up!
Damn, I miss you so much babe.
It's only been two days, but I miss my kid babe.
Look baby, I promise I'll go back to school and finish my degree.
I'll even do that thing you like with the welcome potato sack.
Just call me babe.
I thought that I would feel this way. I thought that I would see the day.
I thought that I would hurt so bad. I thought you'd turn back on me.
I never thought that you would. How could you do this to me?
Baby, I will cry for you tonight, tonight.
Oh, so we're not involved right now?
Normally, unanswered calls on locked doors mean someone doesn't want to be bothered.
But he's stuck in the back of a trunk headed to the nearest dump.
Hey, you gonna let me in bruh?
Hey bruh. Hey bruh.
See me decide to take a stand in this thing that I will.
You got something to drink?
Yes, I'm on it.
It's a little cool. I ain't done like some red Kool-Aid.
Oh, you keeping the cups at me?
What are these?
Cups.
What I'm supposed to do with this?
Drink from it?
Yeah, new garbage size I've been hearing about bruh.
Hey, hey, don't drink all my stuff bruh.
You good?
You alright?
I heard about what happened with you on cameras bruh.
More like soft.
Yeah, you and all 300 of our Twitter followers.
Well, you alright man?
You don't have a...
You don't have a raw whip bruh.
You told your parents yet?
No.
You gonna tell them?
How does one plan on telling somebody's parents that who pay for everything,
that they dropped out of school two credit hours before graduation?
I still don't get that bruh.
If I go through all that hard work and they just quit.
It's like running a marathon and getting to the finish line
and sitting idiot style while everybody else pass by.
Why idiot style?
It's not the point.
Can't you just take another leg and then be done man?
Yeah, sure. Which one do you think will help me become a better psychologist?
Let's see there's pottery, tennis, bowling,
and oh yeah, their choice, field hockey.
You do like bowling though.
That I do, but that's not the point.
It's about the principle.
You see colleges become a storage shelf for...
Yeah, yeah, delayed workforce control social security.
I remember man.
Ah, I see you're learning young Jedi.
Right up.
So what about you and Karen?
You cold?
Dude, really?
That's what I thought.
I mean, she didn't have to do it like that bruh.
She could have called or something.
But hey, I did see somebody this morning that might make you feel better.
What did Karen ask about me?
What, Karen?
Lisa?
Yes, she did ask about you.
What's Lisa doing in town?
She said she saw a tweet.
She was here for you.
Oh, really?
Nah, she got perfect timing though, right?
She in town to catch Ashley's show.
Well, what did she say?
She said, hey, hopefully she'll see you at the show.
Well, where is it?
Shut up, man.
Downtown tomorrow night.
Ashley been going on and on about it all week, man.
I be glad when it's over.
Well, I thought you liked watching her perform.
I do, man.
Then what seems to be the problem?
I need a break.
Oh, I see.
I mean, you've been dating somebody for three years of your college life.
And you feel somewhat left out.
Interesting.
So you feel jipped.
Exactly.
Do you know how many likes I get on my pics on Instagram, bro?
Bro, imagine seeing all these half-naked women.
Very impressive.
So why not dump Ashley if you have all these options?
She always doing shows, man.
Who would I be if I dumped a campus star that...
Sean.
What?
I'm just saying you'd be Sean.
That would be cold blooded.
Is it not cold blooded to give her a false sense of love and affection?
I do love her.
She's like, I'd rather show some love to somebody other women trying to love me.
What's wrong with spreading a little love, bro?
There's nothing wrong with that.
But tell me, but why now?
Why after three years are you ready to give it all away?
It's been slowly building.
About a week ago.
You know, getting clean.
You got me.
You got me, girl.
Hey, baby.
That's you, girl.
I've heard you come in here and give a shout away to her.
Hey, baby.
That's you, girl.
Yeah.
Just a little bit back there.
You all right?
Yeah, thank you.
I'll come and light up on a second.
Oh, yeah, baby.
Oh, baby.
Bruh, she ain't flushed the toilet or nothing.
You believe that, man?
No, I mean, she's such a small girl.
I know, right?
Now it seems like every time I'm in the bathroom, she coming there, she got a poop.
I see.
Is there a problem with that?
Yes.
I'm not ready for this kind of relationship, man.
Who gets comfortable watching and smelling somebody else poop?
Parents, children taking care of their parents, and folks who like that sort of thing.
Fuck.
I'm just kidding, man.
Look, I can understand your discomfort.
The bathroom is a sacred place for many of us.
You know, it's a place where we go to alone to be by ourselves.
You know, to relax, to read, and to release.
Exactly.
So if I want to go in the bathroom with a magazine, this motion.
I shouldn't be worried about who's going to bust up in there.
Why not just lock the door?
Because it's my door, and I shouldn't have to.
You know how I feel about locked doors, man?
That I do.
Maybe I should just dump her now while Lisa is in town so I can have her for support.
Maybe.
But it felt good to go out with my business.
Wait.
What business?
Dump her, Ashley.
Oh, they my Facebook stats, dawg.
Hey, good talk, man.
Appreciate that advice, bruh.
Hey, I never said that, dawg.
Hey, bruh, look.
Don't sit around and think about caring too much, man.
I just might miss out on that, Lisa.
Thank you.
