it was bizarre I mean is it back is it hurting very afraid because we're more
stressed out one minute they're there and the next they're gone so I worry
about it and I worry about I wasn't able to eat lost with out having the
ability to say goodbye you have to judge how much you're supposed to worry
about you have a lot of doubts is it hurt no do we need to do something
different it can be a really confusing time when you've lost the use of your
body I don't think anybody should go through that but I just think it's really
crazy about how many people coming down I hate to use the word cancer because
it's not my favorite description but you don't know who those people are
going to be something that you never really things gonna happen to you in
the last week one of my friends has cancer on her lips another one just had
surgery cancer on her shoulder I said this is ridiculous you know how
can four-year-olds can have cancer you know so when somebody gets diagnosed with
cancer we try to fix it and so now I'm fighting against cancer it's bad look
it in the eye figure out how bad it is to come up with a plan I feel that
cancer is a disease that we should all go out at least become educated on it I
think it's just just amazing this life-threatening thing causing more
people to enjoy their life and to appreciate it more but I just kept
pushing myself to be present in the moment time goes by time goes by they
show up they're getting older and I am tunes like how about that pretty cool
cancer's not back I think everyone should make time because cancer is
something that can ultimately be cured that cancer is not the end and that
there is life looking back it's probably madness but I think one of the things
that keeps you going is you have to make plans you have to have hope and you
have to believe that you're going to be well and therefore you need to be doing
some other things that you would normally do so that's pretty nice when that
happens in spite of this really scary disease this uncertainty it's me to
see people rise to the occasion and be positive I really think that that has
helped me get through the past year and the years to come
