Now you don't know how much pressure we're under to get children's programming back on top.
Robert here has an idea. Roberts?
Well, basically, it's a combination of like a sitcom and a show like Sesame Street, alright?
I call it The Learners, because it's about a family, but kids learn from them as well.
Now, each episode will have a cohesive plot, but something that even Toddler can understand,
you know what I'm saying? And each scene will have an individual lesson
on history, math, science, reading, what happened.
But it'll be subtle, and I think if it's cleverly written, the kids will get the message.
Alright, you can see in this handout that it's a family of five.
First off, there's the parents. Mr. Learner, he's a quirky kind of dad.
And Mrs. Learner, she's the adventurous mom.
One of the female roles to be strong characters, you know, strongly.
There's the three kids, there's Ted, he's the oldest, he's a late teenager.
There's the middle child, Lisa, she's in her tweens.
And the youngest, named David, is seven or eight.
Roberts, I'm going to have to stop you there.
I like the premise, it's great, we can work with it, but it's missing one thing.
One thing that the VP has been asking for for weeks now.
Anybody know what that is? Who knows what I'm talking about?
Diversity, people, come on! Alright, let's work with this.
Brainstorm time. Let's start with Mr. Learner.
He's a white Anglo-Saxon prods, do you not imagine? Yes, Roberts?
We've got to change that, the religion isn't working, what do we got?
Bahai faith. Never heard of it, it's perfect.
Next up is the wife, the mother, what can she be? Black.
Black. Perfect, nothing else we have to do there.
Then we have, what's the kid's name, Ted? Yeah, yeah, Ted.
We've got to do something with Ted, I'm not liking him, what do we got?
Gay. Asian. In a wheelchair.
Homosexual, Korean, on wheels.
Making from North Korea for good measure?
Who's next? Lisa? Is that her name? Yes.
What's Lisa going to be? Hispanic.
Oh, she can teach Spanish on the show. And Indonesian, multilingual.
And she can speak those two better than she can speak English?
Because she's an immigrant. Yeah.
Her most tolerance of illegals? Perfect.
Last up, David, the little kid, seven or eight, what can we do with him?
Anything. Any ideas, nothing.
Anything.
We can't be at a diversity yet, what else is there?
Eskimo. What?
And he's a female to male transsexual, post-operative.
Eskimo? Transman.
Love it, those are our five characters.
Roberts, give me a pile of pie next week.
Wait. What?
No, no. No, sir, I can't. It's...
It's just...
Look, I'm all for diversity.
It's just that this is... this is silly, right?
Are you morally against interracial marriages?
No. No, I am not. That's not what I'm saying.
It's actually... it's about the kids.
They all gotta be white. No, no, no, that's not what I'm saying either.
The idea to make Mrs. Lerner black, it's a good idea. I like that.
It's just that the kids, to be frank, they're not scientifically accurate.
You guys know that.
Look, if a white man and a black woman have three children,
not a single one of them is going to be Hispanic, Asian, or an Eskimo.
They would be a combination of Caucasian and African-American.
That's the way it works. It's common sense.
They're all adopted.
Loving adopted parents sends a great message to the adoptive audience.
All right. Who wants lunch?
