Is she all right now?
She's fine. Now that she's back with me.
I was referring to the girl who fell down the stairs.
Oh, um, I'm out of concussion. A few scratches.
More shook up than anything else.
And how do you feel about everything?
Horrible. Like, giving up on dating women all together.
I'm safer for everyone that way.
That would be a shame.
You think so?
Yes, I do. You have so much to offer the right woman.
One second.
Now, uh, where were we?
I was telling you that I really think it was...
We shouldn't be doing this.
Are you sure?
This isn't helping you.
No, it's helping. It's helping big time.
Am I interrupting something?
No. I was just leaving.
Actually, he was just leaving. Adam, out!
You should be ashamed of yourself, Miss.
Taking advantage of a lonely desperate soul?
You're a professional, alright? A real professional.
Out!
I'm sorry. I'm just jealous, I guess.
No, he was right.
I've let my feelings for you cloud my professionalism.
Do you mean you feel it, too?
What was that noise?
What was that?
I don't hear anything.
I have a bad feeling that if I stay here, things are going to get out of hand.
I'll be fine. I promise.
No, no, I'm sorry. I have to go.
No.
Had we met under better circumstances, maybe.
Anyway, have a nice day, my friends.
I
I
No!
Hello?
Who could tell that I am t sighing wth?
I don't know what you're doing here with a knife.
Why aren't you dressed like Miss Bates?
Because I love you, man.
Are you here to kill me?
Not really.
I actually wanted to kill that therapist bitch.
Then I came to my senses.
I'm not a murderer.
I'm an artist.
You're an artist?
There is no downstairs neighbor.
I made her up.
What?
Yeah, it was me all along.
I need an excuse to get you to come visit me downstairs.
What did you do me an excuse for?
Because you care about that stupid cat more than you care about me.
You're the one who needs a therapist.
Oh, and since we're bearing all here, I never really believed your cat was possessed.
I was just jealous because you loved her more than me.
You cold?
I'd painted the pentagram on the mirror.
I staged a fake blood in the hallway.
I put the tongue in the bedroom.
You mean that wasn't Miss Ronald's tongue?
Nobody.
It was a fake.
And a pretty good one, too, if I do say so myself.
Commenced the crap out of you.
Why?
Because I wanted to convince you to get rid of that cat.
Ever since you got her, I lost my wingman.
We used to party.
We used to do things together.
So you did those things because you wanted your wingman back?
Mostly.
But then I realized there was something more.
I realized that that night I brought the girls over,
and then the one girl brought me back to my place.
But all I could think about was you.
What?
I realized that I didn't just want my wingman back.
I wanted my wingman in the back.
Are you gonna get that?
Are you trying to tell me that you're gay?
That's not me.
That's not me.
No.
No.
No.
No.
It's not me.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No, no.
No.
No, no, no, no.
No.
No, no, no, no.
No.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
