Somebody help me! Get this man away from me!
What do we have here? Don't need to fear, Brightside is here!
Wait, is he rhyming? Don't tell me, you're one of those generic superhero regions.
But I am a hero. You're a creep. You got your costume from the kids section at Wal-
I'll have you know I got my outfit from the adult section at Target.
Is there an adult section of Target?
That's not important. I'm Brightside, Protector from Evil, Defender of the Week, like this woman here.
Speak for yourself, prick.
You know what? I don't need this. I'm outta here.
Wait, what?
Brightside!
Hey man, it looks like you need this more than I do.
Uh, I'm not homeless.
Really? Really? Are you sure?
Am I sure? Yeah, I'm pretty fucking sure I'm not homeless, yeah.
Listen man, no offense, no offense, you just, you kinda look like a bum.
I look like a bum. What's wrong with you, dude?
Okay, okay, I get it, I get why you're angry, I get it, I get it.
But if you could just do me a quick favor, then we'd be good.
I'm trying to improve my image, okay?
If you could just take a quick picture with me, cause you look like a bum, I think I would really help.
Get away from me, get away from me, hero.
Okay, fuck, okay.
Excuse me, sir.
Yes?
That man kinda line over there.
So?
So, aren't you gonna do something about it?
Come on, my lunch break.
And back to what I was saying.
Look, it's not you, it's me.
What?
Well, say, your arch nemesis tries to kidnap me to get to you.
What arch nemesis? My name is Brightside.
I have no powers and I am protector of very few.
That's exactly what I need.
When you started this whole superhero thing, I thought you were trying to be a good person.
But clearly, you don't care about anyone but yourself.
Goodbye, Grant.
How do you find my power?
This mad for the two of us.
I couldn't come for him.
God bless you.
