What is this thing doing?
I think it's broken.
Man, we gotta get some decent equipment.
Take it to the shop.
We've got no gaffers.
We don't have grips.
We don't have anything we need for a decent show.
It's the same song.
Yeah, for crying out loud.
Mmm, that lunch was good.
And the sauce.
Welcome back.
Episode five.
Wow, five already.
Cinco!
Episode de Cinco.
Let's start with fan queries.
Ooh, yeah, fan queries.
Fan query.
From Mallory L.
Mallory L.
Also Anchorage, Alaska.
Again?
The one they don't say.
And it's still, I have to...
We are very popular at Anchorage.
I love that.
If you were a type of plant, Mallory asks,
what kind would you be?
Ew.
So as an herbivore, I have to say,
I would actually prefer not to be a plant.
And if I was, it'd just be one that didn't taste good.
So if people took a bite, they would just spit it right out.
Not milkweed.
Because maybe that tastes...
I've never tried it, but maybe milkweed is like nice and creamy.
That would not be a good one.
I love milk, but I don't think I would enjoy it.
If other things like it.
Or a thistle.
Ew.
Yeah, because it's spiky.
You know what I would want to be?
No.
Venus flytrap.
Because although I'm not a fan of flies,
but meat, I wonder if...
Okay.
So you're the carnivore plant.
Right.
Maybe I could get, if I could get myself to grow in like a cow pasture.
Well, you don't only eat flies, right?
I could nibble like cows when they walk by.
Maybe, you know, mosquitoes or spiders or only flies.
They don't sound appealing.
Probably if I was a Venus flytrap, I'd be like,
heck yeah, flies.
Oh, and I fly.
Mallory, we liked your question.
You're the winner this week.
We're going to send you a autograph picture of this week's product of the week.
And I hope that answers your question.
Please allow six to eight weeks for Dovry.
If we did not answer your question this week,
don't be afraid.
Just keep commenting your fan queries below in this week's video.
And we might pick you next time.
Offer not Val and Arkansas.
Have you mowed your lawn yet this year?
I have several times.
How many times have you mowed your lawn?
I'd have to get more specific on that question.
Because you asked how many times I have mowed.
How many times has your lawn been mowed this season?
It's been mowed about four times.
Wow.
Yeah.
We're only on number one.
I'm about to hit number two.
Really?
Yeah.
And I don't like to mow my lawn.
So I actually have someone do it for me.
Oh.
You have somebody to mow your lawn.
Well, I guess I can't give you too hard of a time.
I have somebody do my lawn for me as well.
But they're short and they live with me.
Not the Smurfs.
I've got two boys and they compete actually for the lawn mowing job.
Oh, who gets to do it?
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
Do you make them split it up like you can mow half and then you can mow half?
Yeah.
My oldest son, he's 13.
And so a couple of years ago, he started mowing.
And that's cool.
And he earns a little bit of money for that.
But then my younger son, who's only nine, always is ready to do whatever he's doing.
So now, yeah, like a big kid gets to do the backyard.
A little kid gets to do the front yard.
And we have a lawn tractor.
So see, there's a fun element.
It's a little bit easier.
Yeah.
Because we have a big lot.
You need to buy a push mower with no transmission.
Yeah.
And you know, self-propelled.
So you get out and then a bag.
You got to make them bag it every time.
They'll be like, I don't want to do this anymore.
If you have to bag it.
Man, I'll tell you what though, it's a sweet deal when your kids are at the point where
they can mow.
Right.
I called it, you know, your golden years are supposed to be like when you're a hundred
or something.
Your golden years, guys, are when your kids are old enough to mow, but not too old yet
then to figure out that it's not that great of a job.
And they're probably trained.
Yeah, that's good.
Because if they can mow but they're not probably trained yet, you got problems.
I'm in this, I'm in this like three-year sweet spot.
Sweet spot.
Where they're like, can we mow?
And I'm like, oh yeah, you can mow.
Do you make them like wear the correct attire or is flip flops and swimsuits okay?
Is CPS watching?
You're not like, put your boots on.
I'd like to invoke my fifth amendment rights to not answer that question.
Because I see people like mowing their lawn and doing the weed eater with flip flops.
And I'm like, that's a bad idea, buddy.
I still do the edging and stuff.
And I don't, I don't, I'm not in flip flops now, probably in shorts and sandals.
I'm not particularly safety conscious.
I don't have a vest.
Well, you know what?
People can see me.
But I'm also not wearing flip flops, public service announcement.
If you're mowing or weeding in flip flops, bad things will happen.
Maybe not today, maybe not next time, but eventually some bad things will happen.
Well, I guess I'm a slow learner because I frequently have bleeding shins and calves from debris.
But I guess I keep chalking it up to, oh, just part of the job.
I think it probably is time for product of the week.
Do we need a jingle?
Product of the week.
Scotch tape.
Now there's a lot of different kinds of Scotch tape, but this one claims to be both magic and invisible.
So I'm not sure what magic principles or qualities it has.
You should have brought it so that we could see it.
What?
Scotch tape.
Can you see?
Is it?
Okay.
No.
So here, I don't know what makes it magic or what makes it invisible.
But look, if I put it, tell me if you can...
Can you see?
It's semi-invisible.
But it's really useful.
You can use it for a lot of stuff.
I don't know how good it sticks.
If you're swimming, you can plug your nose with it.
That'll work.
Here, you try.
Some people have to plug their nose while they're swimming, but this stuff will work.
I don't know if it says if it's waterproof.
But you can ride on it with a pen or a pencil.
Still, there's no explanation why it's magic.
I assume that it's magic.
That's not going to keep water from out your nose, dude.
I assume that it's magic because it's invisible.
And maybe if you wrap yourself in it completely, it'll be like an invisibility cloak.
Yeah.
And that would be magic.
Don't do that for evil.
Only do that for good.
Only for good purposes.
So, we really like Scotch tape.
We use it often and frequently.
But the magic kind is probably the best value for your money.
It's the most magic.
Yeah.
So, shout out to Scotch.
Maybe here.
Here's a suggestion for you viewers at home.
Use it to wrap a gift and give it to somebody you love.
There you go.
Yeah.
Scotch tape.
There we go.
It's safe to first.
See ya.
What's up everybody?
If you thought that that was funny.
It was funny.
For the other night you thought it was funny.
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Please do these four things.
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Thanks.
Bye.
