Alright next, next audition please come forward, alright how are you doing, alright please don't make out contact with me, don't look at me at all, can you just look straight ahead, deliver the Finchies chicken tag line please, Finchies, mmm that tastes great.
Can you do it more black please, more ghetto, more ethnic, Finchies, mmm that tastes great, mmm, can you do it more black please, more ghetto, more ethnic, Finchies, mmm that tastes great.
Almost, more ghetto, more black, more black, Finchies, mmm that tastes great man, very good, very good, nice choice, alright can you do it like an Asian person without being racist please, Finchies, mmm that tastes great.
Okay that was pretty racist, let's try an African, can you do an African boy please, Finchies, mmm it is wonderful chicken, the best chicken I've ever had in my life, I love it, not bad, not bad, let's do the black one again, Finchies, mmm that tastes great.
Let's get you imagining yourself in a park, you're in a park, you've got a chicken leg, you've got a drumstick in your hand, no let's make it a bucket, you've got a bucket of your fried chicken and you're in the park enjoying your day, just a nice day, great, great, great.
Someone has stolen your bucket of chicken, someone has stolen it, what are you going to do, are you going to run after them, you better chase them, is that all you're going to do?
Awesome, great physical choice, and then you're back with the chicken, okay let's imagine there's a great monster that's chasing you in the city and that monster wants your fried chicken, he wants your bucket of fried chicken, are you going to let him have it, are you going to let him have it, no you're not, turn around and defy us to the monster, wave your chicken in the air.
Do you have my chicken? Great verbal choice, great verbal choice, let's get you riding on a chicken, a big piece of chicken, you're riding on a big piece of chicken over the valleys and the mountains, you're free, you can see your house, awesome, awesome, awesome.
Let me see you fight for that chicken, let me see you fight like a caveman, great, great, great, let me see you look like a black person, let me see you look like a black person with a college degree, awesome, awesome.
Alright, well I think that's enough, we have your information and stuff like that, please don't look at me, and I guess we'll be getting back to you.
Okay thank you, my name is Alan. All your name doesn't matter, it's fine.
Next please.
