THE SUBJECT. 
 PAMPHILUS, the son of Laches by his wife Sostrata, being at the time enamored
 of Bacchis, a Courtesan, chances, one night, in a drunken fit, to debauch
 Philumena, the daughter of Phidippus and Myrrhina. In the struggle he takes
 a ring from her, which he gives to Bacchis. Some time afterward, at his
 father's express desire, he consents to marry. By chance the young woman
 whom he has ravished is given to him as a wife, to the great joy of her
 mother, who alone is aware of her misfortune, and hopes that her disgrace
 may be thereby concealed. It, however, happens otherwise ; for Pamphilus,
 still retaining his passion for Bacchis, refuses for some time to cohabit
 with her. Bacchis, however, now rejects the advances of Pamphilus, who by
 degrees becomes weaned from his affection for her, and grows attached to his
 wife, whom he has hitherto disliked. Meantime, however, he is suddenly
 called away from home. During his absence, Philumena, finding herself
 pregnant, in consequence of her misfortune before her marriage, fearing
 detection, especially avoids the company of her mother-in-law. At length she
 makes an excuse for returning to the home of her own parents, where she
 remains. Sostrata thereupon sends for her, but is answered that she is ill,
 on which she goes to see her, but is refused admittance to the house. On
 hearing of this, Laches blames his wife as being the cause of this
 estrangement. Pamphilus now returns, and it so happens that, on the day of
 his arrival, Philumena is brought to bed of a child. Impatient to see her,
 Pamphilus rushes into her room, and to his great distress finds that this is
 the case. Myrrhina thereupon entreats him to keep the matter secret, and
 begs him, if he refuses to receive her daughter back again, at least not to
 ruin her reputation by divulging it. As he now declines either to take back
 his wife or give his reason for so doing, Laches suspects that he is still
 enamored of Bacchis, and accordingly sends for her, and expostulates with
 her. She, however, exonerates herself; on which the old man, supposing that
 Philumena and her mother are equally ignorant with himself as to his son's
 motives, begs her to call on them and remove their suspicions. While she is
 conversing with them, they recognize the ring upon her finger which
 Pamphilus had formerly taken from Philumena. By means of this it is
 discovered that Pamphilus himself is the person who has ravished Philumena;
 on which, overjoyed, he immediately takes home his wife and son.

THE TITLE OF THE PLAY. 
 PERFORMED at the Megalensian Games; Sextus Julius Caesar and Cneius Cornelius
 Dolabella being Curule Aediles. The whole was not then acted. Flaccus, the
 freedman of Claudius, composed the music to a pair of flutes. It was
 composed wholly from the Greek of Menander. It was performed the first time without a
 Prologue. Represented a second time; Cneius Octavius and T. Manlius being
 Consuls. It was then
 brought out in honor of L. Aemilius Paulus, at his Funeral Games, and was
 not approved of. It was repeated a third time; Q. Fulvius and L. Marcius
 being Curule Aediles. L. Ambivius Turpio performed it. It was then approved
 of.

THE SUMMARY OF C. SULPITIUS APOLLINARIS. 
 PAMPHILUS has married Philumena, to whom, when a virgin, he formerly, not
 knowing who she was, offered violence; and whose ring, which he took off by
 force, he gave to his mistress, Bacchis, a Courtesan. Afterward he sets out
 for Imbros, not having touched his bride. Having become pregnant, her mother
 brings her over to her own house, as though sick, that her mother-in-law may
 not know it. Pamphilus returns; detects her being delivered; conceals it;
 but determines not to take back his wife. His father imputes this to his
 passion for Bacchis. While Bacchis is exculpating herself, Myrrhina, the
 mother of the injured girl, by chance recognizes the ring. Pamphilus takes
 back his wife, together with his son.

THE FIRST PROLOGUE. 
 
 Prologue 
 HECYRA 
 is the name of this Play; when it
 was represented for the first time, an unusual disaster and
 calamity 
 interrupted it, so that it could not be witnessed
 throughout or estimated; so much had the populace, carried away with
 admiration, devoted their attention to some rope-dancing. It is now
 offered as though entirely a new Play; and he who wrote it did not wish
 to bring it forward then a second time, on purpose that he might be able
 again to sell it. 
 Other Plays of his 
 you have seen
 represented; I beg you now to give your attention to this.

THE SECOND PROLOGUE. 
 
 
 Prologue 
 I COME to you as an envoy from the Poet, in the character of
 prologue-speaker; allow me to be a successful pleader, that in my old
 age I may enjoy the same privilege that I enjoyed when a younger man,
 when I caused new Plays, that had been once rejected, to come into
 favor; so that his writings might not die with the Poet. Among them, as
 to those of Caecilius, 
 which I first studied when new; in some of
 which I was rejected; in some I kept my ground with difficulty. As I
 knew that the fortune of the stage was varying, where the hopes were
 uncertain, I submitted to certain toil. Those I zealously attempted to
 perform, that from the same writer I might learn new ones, and not
 discourage him from his pursuits. I caused them to be represented. When
 seen, they pleased. Thus did I restore the Poet to his place, who was
 now almost weaned, through the malevolence of his adversaries, from his
 pursuits and labors, and from the dramatic art. But if I had at that
 period slighted the writer, and had wished to use my endeavors in
 discouraging him, so that he might live a life of idleness rather than
 of study, I might have easily discouraged him from writing others. Now,
 for my sake, hear with unbiased minds what it is I ask. I again bring
 before you the Hecyra, which I have never been allowed to act before you
 in silence; such misfortunes have so overwhelmed it. These misfortunes
 your intelligence will allay, if it is a seconder of our exertions. The
 first time, when I began to act this Play, the vauntings of
 boxers, 
 the expectation of a
 rope-dancer, 
 added to
 which, the throng of followers, the noise, the clamor of the women,
 caused me to retire from your presence before the time. In this new
 Play, I attempted to follow the old custom of mine, 
 of making a fresh trial; I
 brought it on again. In the first Act I pleased; when in the mean time a
 rumor spread that gladiators were about to be exhibited; the populace
 flock together, make a tumult, clamor aloud, and fight for their
 places: 
 meantime, I was
 unable to maintain my place. Now there is no confusion: there is
 attention and silence--an opportunity of acting my Play has been granted
 me; to yourselves is given the power of gracing the scenic
 festival. 
 Do not permit, through your
 agency, the dramatic art to sink into the hands of a few; let your
 authority prove a seconder and assistant to my own. If I have never
 covetously set a price upon my skill, and have come to this conclusion,
 that it is the greatest gain in the highest possible degree to
 contribute to your entertainment; allow me to obtain this of you, that
 him who has intrusted his labors to my protection, and himself to your
 integrity,--that him, I say, the malicious may not maliciously deride,
 beset by them on every side. For my sake, admit of this plea, and attend
 in silence, that he may be encouraged to write other Plays, and that it
 may be for my advantage to study new ones hereafter, purchased at my own
 expense.

Enter PHILOTIS and SYRA. 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 I' faith, Syra, you can find
 but very few lovers who prove constant to their mistresses. For
 instance, how often did this Pamphilus swear to Bacchis--how solemnly,
 so that any one might have readily believed him--that he never would
 take home a wife so long as she lived. Well now, he is married. 
 
 
 SYRA 
 Therefore, for that very reason, I earnestly both advise and entreat you
 to take pity upon no one, but plunder, fleece, and rend every man you
 lay hold of. 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 What! Hold no one exempt? 
 
 
 SYRA 
 No one; for not a single one of them, rest assured, comes to you without
 making up his mind, by means of his flatteries, to gratify his passion
 with you at the least possible expense. Will you not, pray, plot against
 them in return ? 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 And yet, upon my faith, it is unfair to be the same to all. 
 
 
 SYRA 
 What! unfair to take revenge on your enemies? or, for them to be caught
 in the very way they try to catch you ? Alas! wretched me! why do not
 your age and beauty belong to me, or else these sentiments of mine to
 you?

Enter PARMENO from the house of LACHES. 
 
 PARMENO 
 
 at the door, speaking to SCIRTUS within. If the old man
 should be asking for me, do you say that I have just gone to the harbor
 to inquire about the arrival of Pamphilus. Do you hear what I say,
 Scirtus? If he asks for me, then you are to say so; if he does not, why,
 say nothing at all; so that at another time I may be able to employ that
 excuse as a new one. Comes forward, and looking
 around. --But is it my dear Philotis that I see? How has she come
 here? Accosting her. Philotis heartily good-morrow. 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 O, good-morrow, Parmeno, 
 
 
 SYRA 
 By my troth, good-morrow, Parmeno. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 I' faith, Syra, the same to you. Philotis, tell me, where have you been
 enjoying yourself so long? 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 For my part, indeed, I have been far from enjoying myself, in leaving
 this place for Corinth with
 a most brutal captain; for two whole years, there, had I to put up with
 him to my sorrow. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 I' troth, I fancy that regret for Athens full oft possessed you, and that you thought but
 poorly of your foresight. 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 It can not be expressed how impatient I was to return hither, get rid of
 the captain, and see yourselves here, that after our old fashion I might
 at my ease enjoy the merry-makings among you; for there it was not
 allowed me to speak, except at the moment prescribed, and on such
 subjects as he chose. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 
 sarcastically. I don't think it was gallant in the
 captain to place a restraint on your tongue. 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 But what is this piece of business that Bacchis has just now been
 telling me in-doors here? pointing to her house. A thing
 I never supposed would come to pass, that he, in her lifetime, could
 possibly prevail upon his feelings to take a wife. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 To take, indeed! 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 Why, look you, has he not taken one? 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 He has; but I doubt whether this match will be lasting. 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 May the Gods and Goddesses grant it so, if it is for the advantage of
 Bacchis. But why am I to believe it is so? Tell me, Parmeno. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 There is no need for its being spread abroad; ask me no more about
 it. 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 For fear, I suppose, it may be made public. So may the Gods prosper me,
 I do not ask you in order that I may spread it abroad, but that, in
 silence, I may rejoice within myself. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 You'll never speak me so fairly, that I shall trust my back to your
 discretion. 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 Oh, don't say so, Parmeno ; 
 as though you
 were not much more impatient to tell me this, than I to learn what I'm
 inquiring about. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 
 to himself. She tells the truth there; and that is my
 greatest failing. To PHILOTIS. If you give me your word
 that you'll keep it a secret, I'll tell you. 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 You are now returning to your natural disposition. I give you my word;
 say on. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Listen. 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 I'm all attention. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Pamphilus was in the height of his passion for Bacchis here, when his
 father began to importune him to take a wife, and to urge those points
 which are usual with all fathers, that he himself was now in years, and
 that he was his only son, that he wished for a support for his declining
 years. He refused at first. But on his father pressing more urgently, he
 caused him to become wavering in his mind, whether to yield rather to
 duty or to love. By hammering on and teazing him, at last the old man
 gained his point; and betrothed him to the daughter of our next-door
 neighbor here pointing to the house of PHIDIPPUS . This
 did not seem so very disagreeable to Pamphilus, until on the very point
 of marriage, when he saw that all was ready, and that no respite was
 granted, but marry he must; then, at last, he took it so much to heart,
 that I do believe if Bacchis had been present, even she would have
 pitied him. Whenever opportunity was afforded for us being alone, so
 that he could converse with me, he used to say: "Parmeno, I am ruined!
 What have I done! Into what misery have I plunged myself! Parmeno, I
 shall never be able to endure this. To my misery, I am undone !" 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 
 vehemently exclaiming. May the Gods and Goddesses
 confound you, Laches, for vexing him so ! 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 To cut the matter short, he took home his wife. On the first night, he
 did not touch the girl; the night that followed that, not a bit the
 more. 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 What is it you tell me? A young man go to bed with a virgin, intoxicated
 to boot, and able to restrain himiself from touching her! You do not say
 what's likely; nor do I believe it to be the truth. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 I suppose it does seem so to you, for no one comes to you unless he is
 eager for you; but he had married her against his will. 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 After this, what followed ? 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 In a very few days after, Pamphilus took me aside, away from the house,
 and told me how that the young woman was still untouched by him; and how
 that before he had taken her home as his wife, he had hoped to be able
 to endure this marriage: "But, Parmeno, as I can not resolve to live
 with her any longer, it is neither honorable in me, nor of advantage to
 the young woman herself, for her to be turned to ridicule, but rather I
 ought to return her to her relations just as I received her." 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 You tell me of a conscientious and virtuous disposition in
 Pamphilus. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 "For me to declare this, I consider to be inconvenient to me, but for
 her to be sent back to her father without mentioning any blame, would be
 insolent; but I am in hopes that she, when she is sensible that she can
 not live with me, will go at last of her own accord." 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 What did he do in the mean while ? Used he to visit Bacchis? 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Every day. But as usually is the case, after she saw that he belonged to
 another, she immediately became more ill-natured and more peevish. 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 I' faith, that's not to be wondered at. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 And this circumstance in especial contributed to estrange him from her;
 after he had fairly examined himself, and her, and the one that was at
 home, he formed a judgment, by comparison, upon the principles of them
 both. She, just as might be expected from a person of respectable and
 free birth, chaste and virtuous, patient under the slights and all the
 insults of her husband, and concealing his affronts. Upon this, his
 mind, partly overcome by compassion for his wife, partly constrained by
 the insolence of the other, was gradually estranged from Bacchis, and
 transferred its affections to the other, after having found a congenial
 disposition. In the mean time, there dies at Imbros 
 an old man, a
 relative of theirs. His property there devolved on them by law. Thither
 his father drove the love-sick Pamphilus, much against his will. He left
 his wife here with his mother, for the old man has retired into the
 country; he seldom comes into the city. 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 What is there yet in this marriage to prevent its being lasting ? 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 You shall hear just now. At first, for several days, there really was a
 good understanding between them. In the mean time, however, in a strange
 way, she began to take a dislike to Sostrata; nor yet was there ever any
 quarrel or words between them. 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 What then ? 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 If at any time she came to converse with her, she would instantly
 withdraw from her presence, 
 and refuse to see her; in fine, when
 she could no longer endure her, she pretended that she was sent for by
 her mother to assist at a sacrifice. When she had been there a few days,
 Sostrata ordered her to be fetched. She made some, I know not what,
 excuse. Again she gave similar orders; no one sent back any excuse.
 After she had sent for her repeatedly, they pretended that the damsel
 was sick. My mistress immediately went to see her; no one admitted her.
 On the old man coming to know of this, he yesterday came up from the
 country on purpose, and waited immediately upon the father of Philumena.
 What passed between them, I do not know as yet; but really I do feel
 some anxiety in what way this is to end. You now have the whole matter;
 and I shall proceed whither I was on my way. 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 And I too, for I made an appointment with a certain stranger 
 to meet him. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 May the Gods prosper what you undertake! 
 
 
 PHILOTIS 
 Farewell! 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 And a kind farewell to you, my dear Philotis. (Exeunt
 severally.)

Enter LACHES and SOSTRATA, from the house of the former. 
 
 LACHES 
 O faith of Gods and men! what a race is this! what a conspiracy this!
 that all women should desire and reject every individual thing alike!
 And not a single one can you find to swerve in any respect from the
 disposition of the rest. For instance, quite as though with one accord,
 do all mothers-in-law hate their daughters-in-law. Just in the same way
 is it their system to oppose their husbands; their obstinacy here is the
 same. In the very same school they all seem to me to have been trained
 up to perverseness. Of that school, if there is any mistress, I am very
 sure that she pointing at SOSTRATA it is. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 Wretched me! when now I don't so much as know why I am accused! 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Eh ! you don't know ? 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 So may the Gods kindly prosper me, Laches, and so may it be allowed us
 to pass our lives together in unity! 
 
 
 LACHES 
 
 aside. May the Gods avert such a misfortune! 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 I'm sure that before long you will be sensible that I have been accused
 by you undeservedly. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 You, undeservedly ? Can any thing possibly be said that you deserve in
 return for this conduct of yours? You, who are disgracing both me and
 yourself and the family, and are laying up sorrow for your Son. Then
 besides, you are making our connections become, from friends, enemies to
 us, who have thought him deserving for them to intrust their
 children 
 to him. You alone have put yourself forward, by your
 folly, to be causing this disturbance. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 What, I ? 
 
 
 LACHES 
 You, woman, I say, who take me to be a stone, not a man. Do you think
 because it's my habit to be so much in the country, that I don't know in
 what way each person is passing his life here ? I know much better what
 is going on here than there, where I am daily; for this reason, because,
 just as you act at home, I am spoken of abroad. Some time since, indeed,
 I heard that Philumena had taken a dislike to you; nor did I the least
 wonder at it; indeed, if she hadn't done so, it would have been more
 surprising. But I did not suppose that she would have gone so far as to
 hate even the whole of the family; if I had known that, she should have
 remained here in preference, and you should have gone away. But consider
 how undeservedly these vexations arise on your account, Sostrata; I went
 to live in the country, in compliance with your request, and to look
 after my affairs, in order that my circumstances might be able to
 support your lavishness and comforts, not sparing my own exertions,
 beyond what's reasonable and my time of life allows. That you should
 take no care, in return for all this, that there should be nothing to
 vex me! 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 Upon my word, through no means or fault of mine has this taken
 place. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Nay, through you in especial; you were the only person here; on you
 alone, Sostrata, falls all the blame. You ought to have taken care of
 matters here, as I had released you from other anxieties. Is it not a
 disgrace for an old woman to pick a quarrel with a girl? You will say it
 was her fault. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 Indeed I do not say so, my dear Laches. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 I am glad of that, so may the Gods prosper me, for my son's sake. I am
 quite sure of this, that no fault of yours can possibly put you in a
 worse light. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 How do you know, my husband, whether she may not have pretended to
 dislike me, on purpose that she might be more with her mother? 
 
 
 LACHES 
 What say you to this? Is it not proof sufficient, when yesterday no one
 was willing to admit you into the house, when you went to see her? 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 Why, they told me that she was very ill just then; for that reason I was
 not admitted to her. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 I fancy that your humors are more her malady than any thing else; and
 with good reason in fact, for there is not one of you but wants her son
 to take a wife; and the match which has taken your fancy must be the
 one; when, at your solicitation, they have married, then, at your
 solicitation, they are to put them away again.

Enter PHIDIPPUS from his house. 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 
 speaking to PHILUMENA within. Although I am aware,
 Philumena, that I have the right to compel you to do what I order,
 still, being swayed by the feelings of a father, I will prevail upon
 myself to yield to you, and not oppose your inclination. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 And look, most opportunely I see Phidippus; I'll presently know from him
 how it is. Accosting him. Phidippus, although I am aware
 that I am particularly indulgent to all my family, still it is not to
 that degree to let my good nature corrupt their minds. And if you would
 do the same, it would be more for your own interest and ours. At present
 I see that you are under the control of those women. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Just look at that, now ! 
 
 
 LACHES 
 I waited on you yesterday about your daughter; you sent me away just as
 wise as I came. It does not become you, if you wish this alliance to
 continue, to conceal your resentment. If there is any fault on our side,
 disclose it; either by clearing ourselves, or excusing it, we shall
 remedy these matters for you, yourself the judge. But if this is the
 cause of detaining her at your house, because she is ill, then I think
 that you do me an injustice, Phidippus, if you are afraid lest she
 should not be attended with sufficient care at my house. But, so may the
 Gods prosper me, I do not yield in this to you, although you are her
 father, that you can wish her well more than I do, and that on my son's
 account, who I know values her not less than his own self. Nor, in fact,
 is it unknown to you, how much, as I believe, it will vex him, if he
 comes to know 
 of this; for this reason, I wish to
 have her home before he returns. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Laches, I am sensible of both your carefulness and your good-will, and I
 am persuaded that all you say is just as you say: and I would have you
 believe me in this; I am anxious for her to return to you, if I possibly
 can by any means effect it. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 What is it prevents you from effecting it? Come, now, does she make any
 complaint against her husband? 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 By no means; for when I urged it still more strongly, and attempted to
 constrain her by force to return, she solemnly protested that she
 couldn't possibly remain with you, while Pamphilus was absent. Probably
 each has his own failing; I am naturally of an indulgent disposition; I
 can not thwart. my own family. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 
 turning to his wife, who stands apart. Ha!
 Sostrata! 
 
 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 
 sighing deeply. Alas! wretched me! 
 
 
 LACHES 
 
 to PHIDIPPUS. Is this your final determination ? 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 For the present, at least, as it seems; but have you any thing else to
 say? for I have some business that obliges me to go at once to the
 Forum. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 I'll go with you. (Exeunt.)

SOSTRATA alone. 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 Upon my faith, we assuredly are all of us hated by our husbands with
 equal injustice, on account of a few, who cause us all to appear
 deserving of harsh treatment. For, so may. the Gods prosper me, as to
 what my husband accuses me of, I am quite guiltless. But it is not so
 easy to clear myself, so strongly have people come to the conclusion
 that all step-mothers are harsh: i' faith, not I, indeed, for I never
 regarded her otherwise than if she had been my own daughter; nor can I
 conceive how this has befallen me. But really, for many reasons, I long
 for. my son's return home with impatience. Goes into her
 house.

Enter PAMPHILUS and PARMENO. 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 No individual, I do believe, ever met with more crosses in love than I.
 Alas! unhappy me! that I have thus been sparing of life! Was it for this
 I was so very impatient to return home ? O, how much more preferable had
 it been for me to pass my life any where in the world than to return
 here and be sensible that I am thus wretched! For all of us know who
 have met with trouble from any cause, that all the time that passes
 before we come to the knowledge of it, is so much gain. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Still, as it is, you'll the sooner know how to extricate yourself from
 these misfortunes. If you had not returned, this breach might have
 become much wider; but now, Pamphilus, I am sure that both will be awed
 by your presence. You will learn the facts, remove their enmity, restore
 them to good feeling once again. These are but trifles which you have
 persuaded yourself are so grievous. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Why comfort me? Is there a person in all the world so wretched as I?
 Before I took her to wife, I had my heart engaged by other affections.
 Now, though on this subject I should be silent, it is easy for any one
 to know how much I have suffered; yet I never dared refuse her whom my
 father forced upon me. With difficulty did I withdraw myself from
 another, and disengage my affections so firmly rooted there! and hardly
 had I fixed them in another quarter, when, lo! a new misfortune has
 arisen, which may tear me from her too. Then besides, I suppose that in
 this matter I shall find either my mother or my wife in fault; and when
 I find such to be the fact, what remains but to become still more
 wretched? For duty, Parmeno, bids me bear with the feelings of a mother;
 then, to my wife I am bound by obligations; with so much temper did she
 formerly bear my usage, and on no occasion disclose the many wrongs
 inflicted on her by me. But, Parmeno, something of consequence, I know
 not what it is, must have happened for this misunderstanding to have
 arisen between them, that has lasted so long. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Or else something frivolous, i' faith, if you would only give words
 their proper value; those which are sometimes the greatest enmities, do
 not argue the greatest injuries; for it often happens that in certain
 circumstances, in which another would not even be out of temper, for the
 very same reason a passionate man becomes your greatest enemy. What
 enmities do children entertain among themselves for trifling injuries!
 For what reason? Why, because they have a weak understanding to direct
 them. Just so are these women, almost like children with their fickle
 feelings; perhaps a single word has occasioned this enmity between them,
 master. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Go, Parmeno, into the house, and carry word 
 that I have arrived. A noise is
 heard in the house of PHIDIPPUS. 
 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 
 starting. Ha! What means this? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Be silent. I perceive a bustling about, and a running to and fro. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 
 going to the door. Come then, I'll approach nearer to the
 door. He listens. Ha! did you hear? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Don't be prating. He listens. O Jupiter, I heard a
 shriek! 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 You yourself are talking, while you forbid me. 
 
 
 MYRRHINA 
 
 within the house. Prithee, my child, do be silent. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 That seems to be the voice of Philumena's mother. I'm undone 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Why so? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Utterly ruined! 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 For what reason? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Parmeno, you are concealing from me some great misfortune to me
 unknown. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 They said that your wife, Philumena, was in alarm about 
 something, I know not what; whether that may be
 it, perchance, I don't know. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 I am undone! Why didn't you tell me of this? 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Because I couldn't tell every thing at once. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 What is the malady? 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 I don't know. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 What! has no one brought a physician to see her? 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 I don't know. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Why delay going in-doors, that I may know as soon as possible for
 certain what it is? In what condition, Philumena, am I now to find you?
 But if you are in any peril, beyond a doubt I will perish with you.
 Goes into the house of PHIDIPPUS. 
 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 
 to himself. There is no need for me to follow him into
 the house at present, for I see that we are all disagreeable to them.
 Yesterday, no one would give Sostrata admittance. If, perchance, the
 malady should become worse, which really I could far from wish, for my
 master's sake especially, they would at once say that Sostrata's servant
 had been in there; they would invent a story that I had brought some
 mischief against their lives and persons, in consequence of which the
 malady had been increased. My mistress would be blamed, and I should
 incur heavy punishment. 
 
 
 
 
 Enter SOSTRATA. 
 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 
 to herself. In dreadful alarm, I have for some time
 heard, I know not what confusion going on here; I'm sadly afraid
 Philumena's illness is getting worse. Aesculapius, I do entreat thee,
 and thee, Health, 
 that it may not be so. Now I'll go visit her.
 Approaches the door. 
 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 
 coming forward. Hark you, Sostrata. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 
 turning round. Well. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 You will again be shut out there. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 What, Parmeno, is it you? I'm undone! wretch that I am, what shall I do?
 Am I not to go see the wife of Pamphilus, when she is ill here next
 door? 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Not go see her! Don't even send any person for the purpose of seeing
 her; for I'm of opinion that he who loves, a person to whom he is an
 object of dislike, commits a double mistake: he himself takes a useless
 trouble, and causes annoyance to the other. Besides, your son went in to
 see how she is, as soon as he arrived. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 What is it you say? Has Pamphilus arrived? 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 He has. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 I give thanks unto the Gods! Well, through that news my spirits are
 revived, and anxiety has departed from my heart. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 For this reason, then, I am especially unwilling you should go in there;
 for if Philumena's malady at all abates, she will, I am sure, when they
 are by themselves, at once tell him all the circumstances; both what
 misunderstandings have arisen between you, and how the difference first
 began. But see, he's coming out-how sad he looks! Re-enter
 PAMPHILUS, from the house of PHIDIPPUS. 
 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 
 running up to him. O my son! Embraces
 him. 
 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 My mother, blessings on you. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 I rejoice that you are returned safe. Is Philumena in a fair way? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 She is a little better. Weeping. 
 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 Would that the Gods may grant it so! Why, then, do you weep, or why so
 dejected? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 All's well, mother. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 What meant that confusion? Tell me; was she suddenly taken ill? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Such was the fact. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 What is her malady? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 A fever. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 An intermitting one? 
 
 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 So they say. Go in the house, please, mother; I'll follow you
 immediately. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 Very well. Goes into her house. 
 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Do you run and meet the servants, Parmeno, and help them with the
 baggage. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Why, don't they know the way themselves to come to our house? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 
 stamping. Do you loiter? (Exit PARMENO.)

PAMPHILUS, alone. 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 I can not discover any fitting commencement of my troubles, at which to
 begin to narrate the things that have so unexpectedly befallen me, some
 of which with these eyes I have beheld; some I have heard with my ears;
 and on account of which I so hastily betook myself, in extreme
 agitation, out of doors. For just now, when, full of alarm, I rushed
 into the house, expecting to find my wife afflicted with some other
 malady than what I have found it to be--ah me! immediately the
 servant-maids beheld that I had arrived, they all at the same moment
 joyfully exclaimed, "He is come," from having so suddenly caught sight
 of me. But I soon perceived the countenances of all of them
 change, 
 because at so
 unseasonable a juncture chance had brought me there. One of them in the
 mean time hastily ran before me to give notice that I had come.
 Impatient to see my wife, I followed close. When I entered the room,
 that instant, to my sorrow, I found out her malady; for neither did the
 time afford any. interval to enable her to conceal it, nor could she
 complain in any other accents than those which the case itself prompted.
 When I perceived this: "O disgraceful conduct!" I exclaimed, and
 instantly hurried away from the spot in tears, overwhelmed by such an
 incredible and shocking circumstance. Her mother followed me; just as I
 got to the threshold, she threw herself on her knees: I felt compassion
 for her. Assuredly it is the fact, in my opinion, just as matters befall
 us all, so are we elated or depressed. At once she began to address me
 in these words: "O my dear Pamphilus, you see the reason why she left
 your house; for violence was offered to her when formerly a maid, by
 some villain to us unknown. Now, she took refuge here then, that from
 you and others she might conceal her labor." But when I call to mind her
 entreaties, I can not, wretched as I am, refrain from tears. "Whatever
 chance or fortune it is," said she, "which has brought you here to-day,
 by it we do both conjure you, if with equity and justice we may, that
 her misfortune may be concealed by you, and kept a secret from all. If
 ever you were sensible, my dear Pamphilus, that she was tenderly
 disposed toward you, she now asks you to grant her this favor in return,
 without making any difficulty of it. But as to taking her back, act
 quite according to your own convenience. You alone are aware of her.
 lying-in, and that the child is none of yours. For it is said that it
 was two months after the marriage before she had commerce with you. And
 then, this is but the seventh month since she came to you. 
 That you are sensible of
 this, the circumstances themselves prove. Now, if it is possible,
 Pamphilus, I especially wish, and will use my endeavors, that her labor
 may remain unknown to her father, and to all, in fact. But if that can
 not be managed, and they do find it out, I will say that she miscarried;
 I am sure no one will suspect otherwise than, what is so likely, the
 child was by you. It shall be instantly exposed; in that case there is
 no inconvenience whatever to yourself, and you will be concealing an
 outrage so undeservingly committed upon her, 
 poor thing!" I promised
 this, and I am resolved to keep faith in what I said. But as to taking
 her back, really I do not think that would be at all creditable, nor
 will I do so, although love for her, and habit, have a strong influence
 upon me. I weep when it occurs to my mind, what must be her life, and
 how great her loneliness in future. O Fortune, thou hast never been
 found constant! But by this time my former passion has taught me
 experience in the present case. The means by which I got rid of that, I
 must employ on the present occasion. Parmeno is coming with the
 servants; it is far from convenient that he should be here under present
 circumstances, for he was the only person to whom I trusted the secret
 that I kept aloof from her when I first married her. I am afraid lest,
 if he should frequently hear her cries, he might find out that she is in
 labor. He must be dispatched by me somewhere till Philumena is
 delivered.

Enter at a distance PARMENO and SOSIA, with people carrying
 baggage. 
 
 PARMENO 
 
 to SOSIA. Do you say that this voyage was disagreeable to
 you? 
 
 
 SOSIA 
 Upon my faith, Parmeno, it can not be so much as expressed in words, how
 disagreeable it is to go on a voyage. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Do you say so? 
 
 
 SOSIA 
 O lucky man! You don't know what evils you have escaped, by never having
 been at sea. For to say nothing of other hardships, mark this one only;
 thirty days or more 
 was I on board that ship, and every
 moment, to my horror, was in continual expectation of death: such
 unfavorable weather did we always meet with. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 How annoying!. 
 
 
 SOSIA 
 That's not unknown to me: in fine, upon my faith, I would rather run
 away than go back, if I knew that I should have to go back there. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Why really, but slight causes formerly made you, Sosia, do what now you
 are threatening to do. But I see Pamphilus himself standing before the
 door. To the Attendants, who go into the house of LACHES. 
 Go in-doors; I'll accost him, to see if he wants any thing with me.
 Accosts PAMPHILUS. What, still standing here,
 master? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Yes, and waiting for you. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 What's the matter? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 You must run across to the citadel. 
 
 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Who must? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 You. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 To the citadel? Why thither? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 To meet Callidemides, my entertainer at Myconos, who came over in the
 same ship with me. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 
 aside. Confusion! I should say he has made a vow that if
 ever he should return home safe, he would rupture me 
 with walking. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Why are you lingering? 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 What do you wish me to say? Or am I to meet him only? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 No; say that I can not meet him to-day, as I appointed, so that he may
 not wait for me to no purpose. Fly! 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 But I don't know the man's appearance. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Then I'll tell you how to know it; a huge fellow, ruddy, with curly
 hair, fat, with gray eyes and freckled countenance. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 May the Gods confound him! What if he shouldn't come? Am I to wait
 there, even till the evening? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Yes, wait there. Run! 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 I can't; I am so tired. (Exit slowly.) 
 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 He's off. What shall I do in this distressed situation? Really, I don't
 know in what way I'm to conceal this, as Myrrhina entreated me, her
 daughter's lying-in; but I do pity the woman. What I can, I'll do; only
 so long, however, as I observe my duty; for it is proper that I should
 be regardful of a parent, 
 rather
 than of my passion. But look--I see Phidippus and my father. They are
 coming this way; what to say to them, I'm at a loss. Stands
 apart.

Enter, at a distance, LACHES and PHIDIPPUS. 
 
 LACHES 
 Did you not say, just now, that she was waiting for my son's return? 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Just so. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 They say that he has arrived; let her return. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 
 apart to himself aloud. What excuse to make to my father
 for not taking her back, I don't know! 
 
 
 LACHES 
 
 turning round. Who was it I heard speaking here? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 
 apart. I am resolved to persevere in the course I
 determined to pursue. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 'Tis the very person about whom I was talking to you. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Health to you, my father. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Health to you, my son. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 I am glad that you have returned, Pamphilus, and the more especially so,
 as you are safe and well. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 I believe you. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Have you but just arrived? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Only just now. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Tell me, what has our cousin Phania left us? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Why really, i' faith, he was a man very much devoted to pleasure while
 he lived; and those who are so, don't much benefit their heirs, but for
 themselves leave this commendation: While he lived, he lived
 well. 
 
 
 
 
 LACHES 
 So then, you have brought home nothing more 
 than a
 single sentiment? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Whatever he has left, we are the gainers by it. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Why no, it has proved a loss; for I could have wished him alive and
 well. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 You may wish that with impunity; he'll never come to life again; and
 after all I know which of the two you would prefer. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Yesterday, he pointing to PHIDIPPUS desired Philumena to
 be fetched to his house. Whispers to PHIDIPPUS, nudging him with
 his elbow. Say that you desired it. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 
 aside to LACHES Don't punch me so. To
 PAMPHILUS. I desired it. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 But he'll now send her home again. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Of course. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 I know the whole affair, and how it happened; I heard it just now, on my
 arrival. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Then may the Gods confound those spiteful people who told this news with
 such readiness! 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 
 to PHIDIPPUS. I am sure that it has been my study, that
 with reason no slight might possibly be committed by your family; and if
 I were now truthful to mention of how faithful, loving, and tender a
 disposition I have proved toward her, I could do so truly, did I not
 rather wish that you should learn it of herself; for by that method you
 will be the more ready to place confidence in my disposition when she,
 who is now acting unjustly toward me, speaks favorably of me. And that
 through no fault of mine this separation has taken place, I call the
 Gods to witness. But since she considers that it is not befitting her to
 give way to my mother, and with readiness to conform to her temper, and
 as on no other terms it is possible for good feeling to exist between
 them, either my mother must be separated, Phidippus, from me, or else
 Philumena. Now affection urges me rather to consult my mother's
 pleasure. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Pamphilus, your words have reached my ears not otherwise than to my
 satisfaction, since I find that you post-pone all considerations for
 your parent. But take care, Pamphilus, lest impelled by resentment, you
 carry matters too far. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 How, impelled by resentment, could, I now be biased against her who
 never has been guilty of any thing toward me, father, that I could not
 wish, and who has often deserved as well as I could desire? I both love
 and praise and exceedingly regret her, for I have found by experience
 that she was of a wondrously engaging disposition with regard to myself;
 and I sincerely wish that she may spend the remainder of her life with a
 husband who may prove more fortunate than me, since necessity thus tears
 her from me. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 'Tis in your own power to prevent that. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 If you are in your senses, order her to come back. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 It is not my intention, father; I shall study my mother's interests.
 Going away. 
 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Whither are you going? Stay, stay, I tell you; whither are you going?
 (Exit PAMPHILUS.) 
 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 What obstinacy is this? 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Did I not tell you, Phidippus, that he would take this matter amiss? It
 was for that reason I entreated you to send your daughter back. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Upon my faith, I did not believe he would be so brutish; does he now
 fancy that I shall come begging to him? If so it is that he chooses to
 take back his wife, why, let him; if he is of another mind, let him pay
 back her portion, 
 and take
 himself off. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Just look at that, now; you too are getting obstinate and huffish. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 
 speaking with anger. You have returned to us in a very
 ungovernable mood, Pamphilus. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 This anger will depart; although he has some reason for being vexed. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Because you have had a windfall, a little money, your minds are
 elevated. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Are you going to fall out with me, too? 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Let him consider, and bring me word to-day, whether he will or will not,
 that she may belong to another if she does not to him. Goes
 hastily into his own house. 
 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Phidippus, stay; listen to a few words-- 
 
 
 LACHES 
 He's off; what matters it to me? In fine, let them manage it between
 themselves,just as they please; since neither my son nor he pay any
 regard to me; they care but little for what I say. I'll carry the
 quarrel to my wife, by whose planning all these things have been brought
 about, and against her I will vent all the vexation that I feel.

Enter MYRRHINA, from her house. 
 
 MYRRHINA 
 I am undone! What am I to do? which way turn myself? In my wretchedness,
 what answer am I to give to my husband? For he seems to have heard the
 voice of the child when crying, so suddenly did he rush in to my
 daughter without saying a word. What if he comes to know that she has
 been delivered? for what reason I am to say I kept it concealed, upon my
 faith I do not know. But there's a noise at the door; I believe it is
 himself coming out to me: I'm utterly undone! Enter PHIDIPPUS,
 from the house. 
 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 
 to himself. My wife, when she saw me going to my
 daughter, betook herself out of the house: and look, there she is.
 Addressing her. What have you to say, Myrrhina? Hark
 you! to you I speak. 
 
 
 MYRRHINA 
 What, to me, my husband? 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Am I your husband? Do you consider me a husband, or a man, in fact? For,
 woman, if I had ever appeared to you to be either of these, I should not
 in this way have been held in derision by your doings. 
 
 
 MYRRHINA 
 By what doings? 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Do you ask the question? Is not your daughter brought to bed? Eh, are
 you silent? By whom? 
 
 
 MYRRHINA 
 Is it proper for a father to be asking such a question? Oh, shocking! By
 whom do you think, pray, except by him to whom she was given in
 marriage? 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 I believe it; nor indeed is it for a father to think otherwise. But I
 wonder much what the reason can be for which you so very much wish all
 of us to be in ignorance of the truth, especially when she has been
 delivered properly, and at the right time. 
 That you should be of a mind so perverse as to
 prefer that the child should perish, through which you might be sure
 that hereafter there would be a friendship more lasting between us,
 rather than that, at the expense of your feelings, his wife should
 continue with him! I supposed this to be their fault, while in reality
 it lies with you. 
 
 
 MYRRHINA 
 I am an unhappy creature! 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 I wish I were sure that so it was; but now it recurs to my mind what you
 once said about this matter, when we accepted him as our son-in-law. For
 you declared that you could not endure your daughter to be married to a
 person who was attached to a courtesan, and who spent his nights away
 from home. 
 
 
 MYRRHINA 
 
 aside. Any cause whatever I had rather he should suspect
 than the right one. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 I knew much sooner than you did, Myrrhina, that he kept a mistress; but
 this I never considered a crime in young men; for it is natural to them
 all. For, i' faith, the time will soon come when even he will be
 disgusted with himself for doing so. But just as you formerly showed
 yourself, you have never. ceased to be the same up to the present time;
 in order that you might withdraw your daughter from him, and that what I
 did might not hold good, one thing itself now plainly proves how far you
 wished it carried out. 
 
 
 MYRRHINA 
 Do you suppose that I am so willful that I could have entertained such
 feelings toward one whose mother I am, if this match had been to our
 advantage? 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Can you possibly foresee or judge what is to our advantage? You have
 heard it of some one, perhaps, who has told you that he has seen him
 coming from or going to his mistress. What then? If he has done so with
 discretion, and but occasionally, is it not more kind in us to conceal
 our knowledge of it, than to do our. best to be aware of it, in
 consequence of which he will detest us? For if he could all at once have
 withdrawn himself from her with whom he had been intimate for so many
 years, I should not have deemed him a man, or likely to prove a constant
 husband for our daughter. 
 
 
 MYRRHINA 
 Do have done about the young man, I pray; and what you say I've been
 guilty of. Go away, meet him by yourself; ask him whether he wishes to
 have her as a wife or not; if so it is that he should say he does wish
 it, why, send her back; but if on the other hand he does not wish it, I
 have taken the best course for my child. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 And suppose he does not wish it, and you, Myrrhina, knew him to be in
 fault; still I was at hand, by whose advice it was proper for these
 matters to be settled; therefore I am greatly offended that you have
 presumed to act thus without my leave. I forbid you to attempt to carry
 the child any where out of this house. But I am very foolish to be
 expecting her to obey my orders. I'll go in-doors, and charge the
 servants to allow it to be carried out nowhere. Goes into the
 house. 
 
 
 
 MYRRHINA 
 Upon my faith, I do believe that there is no woman living more wretched
 than I; for how he would take it, if he came to know the real state of
 the case, i' faith, is not unknown to me, when he bears this, which is
 of less consequence, with such angry feelings; and I know not in what
 way his sentiments can possibly be changed. Out of very many
 misfortunes, this one evil alone had been wanting to me, for him to
 compel me to rear a child of whom we know not who is the father; for
 when my daughter was ravished, it was so dark that his person could not
 be distinguished, nor was any thing taken from him on the occasion by
 which it could be afterward discovered who he was. He, on leaving her,
 took away from the girl, by force, a ring which 
 she had upon her finger. I am afraid, too, of
 Pamphilus, that he may be unable any longer to conceal what I have
 requested, when he learns that the child of another is being brought up
 as his. Goes into the house.

Enter SOSTRATA and PAMPHILUS. 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 It is not unknown to me, my son, that I am suspected by you as the cause
 of your wife having left our house in consequence of my conduct;
 although you carefully conceal your knowledge of it. But so may the Gods
 prosper me, and so may you answer all my hopes, I have never knowingly
 deserved that hatred of me should with reason possess her; and while I
 thought before that you loved me, on that point you have confirmed my
 belief: for in-doors your father has just now related to me in what way
 you have preferred me to your passion. Now it is my determination to
 return you the favor, that you may understand that with me lies the
 reward of your affection. My Pamphilus, I think that this is expedient
 both for yourselves and my own reputation. I have finally resolved to
 retire hence into the country with your father, that my presence may not
 be an obstacle, and that no pretense may remain why your Philumena
 should not return to you. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Pray, what sort of resolution is this? Driven away by her folly, would
 you be removing from the city to live in the country? You shall not do
 so; and I will not permit, mother, any one who may wish to censure us,
 to say that this has been done through my perverseness, and not your
 inclination. Besides, I do not wish you, for my sake, to forego your
 friends and relations, and festive days. 
 
 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 Upon my word, these things afford me no pleasure now. While my time of
 life permitted it, I enjoyed them enough; satiety of that mode of life
 has now taken possession of me: this is at present my chief concern,
 that the length of my life may prove an annoyance to no one, or that he
 may look forward with impatience to my death. 
 Here I see that, without deserving it, I am disliked;
 it is time for me to retire. Thus, in the best way, I imagine, I shall
 cut short all grounds of discontent with all; I shall both free myself
 from suspicion, and shall be pleasing them. Pray, let me avoid this
 reproach, which so generally attaches on women to their
 disadvantage. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 
 aside. How happy am I in other respects, were it not for
 this one thing alone, in having such a good mother, and her for my
 wife! 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 Pray, my Pamphilus, can you not, seeing how each woman is, prevail upon
 yourself to put up with one matter of inconvenience? If every thing else
 is according to your wish, and such as I take it to be-my son, do grant
 me this indulgence, and take her back. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Alas! wretched me! 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 And me as well; for this affair does not cause me less sorrow than you,
 my son.

Enter LACHES. 
 
 LACHES 
 While standing just by here, I have heard, wife, the conversation you
 have been holding with him. It is true wisdom to be enabled to govern
 the feelings whenever there is necessity; to do at the present moment
 what may perhaps, in the end, be necessary to be done. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 Good luck to it, i' troth. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Retire then into the country; there I will bear with you, and you with
 me. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 I hope so, i' faith. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Go in-doors then, and get together the things that are to be taken with
 you. I have now said it. 
 
 
 SOSTRATA 
 I'll do as you desire. Goes into the house. 
 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Father! 
 
 
 LACHES 
 What do you want, Pamphilus? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 My mother go away? By no means. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Why would you have it so? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Because I am as yet undetermined what I shall do about my wife. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 How is that? What should you intend to do but bring her home? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 For my part, I could like, and can hardly forbear it; but I shall not
 alter my design; that which is most advantageous I shall pursue; I
 suppose ironically that they will be better reconciled,
 in consequence, if I shall take her back. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 You can not tell. But it matters nothing to you which they do when she
 has gone away. Persons of this age are disliked by young people; it is
 right for us to withdraw from the world; in fine, we are now a nice
 by-word. We are, Pamphilus, "the old man and the old woman."' 
 But I see Phidippus coming
 out just at the time; let's accost him.

Enter PHIDIPPUS, from his house. 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 . speaking at the door to PHILUMENA, within. Upon my
 faith, I am angry with you too, Philumena, extremely so, for, on my
 word, you have acted badly; still there is an excuse for you in this
 matter; your mother forced you to it; but for her there is none. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 
 accosting him. Phidippus, you meet me at a lucky moment,
 just at the very time. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 What's the matter? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 
 aside. What answer shall I make them, or in what manner
 keep this secret? 
 
 
 LACHES 
 (to PHIDIPPUS.) Tell your daughter that Sostrata is going into the
 country, that the may not now be afraid of returning home. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Alas! your wife has been guilty of no fault in this affair; all this
 mischief has originated in my wife Myrrhina. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 
 aside. They are changing sides. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 'Tis she that causes our disturbances, Laches. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 
 aside. So long as I don't take her back, let her cause as
 much disturbance as she pleases. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 I, Pamphilus, could really wish, if it were possible, this alliance
 between us to be lasting; but if you are otherwise inclined, still take
 the child. 
 
 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 
 aside. He has discovered that she has been brought to
 bed. I'm undone! 
 
 
 LACHES 
 The child! What child? 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 We have had a grandson born to us; for my daughter was removed from you
 in a state of pregnancy, and yet never before this day did I know that
 she was pregnant. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 So may the Gods prosper me, you bring good tidings, and I am glad a
 child has been born, and that she is safe: but what kind of woman have
 you for a wife, or of what sort of a temper, that we should have been
 kept in ignorance of this so long? I can not sufficiently express how
 disgraceful this conduct appears to me. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 This conduct does not vex me less than yourself, Laches. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 
 aside. Even if it had just now been a matter of doubt to
 me, it is so no longer, since the child of another man is to accompany
 her. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Pamphilus, there is no room now for deliberation for you in this
 matter. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 . aside. I'm undone! 
 
 
 LACHES 
 
 to PAMPHILUS. We were often longing to see the day on
 which there should be one to call you father; it has come to pass. I
 return thanks to the Gods. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 . aside. I am ruined! 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Take home your wife, and don't oppose my will. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Father, if she had wished to have children by me, or to continue to be
 my wife, I am quite certain she would not have concealed from me what I
 find she has concealed. Now, as I find that her mind is estranged from
 me, and think that there would be no agreement between us in future, why
 should I take her back? 
 
 
 LACHES 
 The young woman has done what her mother persuaded her. Is that to be
 wondered at? Do you suppose you can find any woman who is free from
 fault? Or is it that men have no failings? 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Do you yourselves now consider, Laches, and you, Pamphilus, whether it
 is most advisable for you to leave her or take her back. What your wife
 may do, is not in my control. Under neither circumstance will you meet
 with any difficulty from me. But what are we to do with the child? 
 
 
 LACHES 
 You do ask an absurd question; whatever-happens, send him back his child
 of course, that we: may bring it up as ours. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 . in a low voice. A child which the father has abandoned,
 am I to rear?. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 What was it you said? How--not rear it, Pamphilus? Prithee, are we to
 expose it, in preference? What madness is this? Really, I can not now be
 silent any longer. For you force me to say in his presence (pointing to
 PHIDIPPUS what I would rather not. Do you suppose I am in ignorance of
 the cause of your tears, or what it is on account of which you are
 perplexed to this degree? In the first place, when you alleged as a
 reason, that, on account of your mother, you could not have your wife at
 home, she promised that she would leave the house. Now, since you see
 this pretext as well taken away from you, because a child has been born
 without your knowledge, you have got another You are mistaken if you
 suppose that I am ignorant of your feelings. That at last you might
 prevail upon your feelings to take this step, how long a period for
 loving a mistress did I allow you! With what patience did I bear the
 expense you were at in keeping her! I remonstrated with you and
 entreated you to take a wife. I said that it was time: by my persuasion
 you married. What you then did in obedience to me, you did as became
 you. Now again you have set your fancy upon a mistress, and, to gratify
 her, you do an injury to the other as well. For I see plainly that you
 have once more relapsed into the same course of life. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 What, I? 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Your own self, and you act unjustly therein. You feign false grounds for
 discord, that you may live with her when you have got rid of this
 witness of your actions; your wife has perceived it too; for what other
 reason had she for leaving you? 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 
 to himself. It's clear he guesses right; for that must be
 it. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 I will give you my oath that none of these is the reason. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Oh take home your wife, or tell me why you should not. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 It is not the time at present. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Take the child, for surely that is not in fault; I will consider about
 the mother afterward. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 
 apart. In every way I am wretched, and what to do I know
 not; with so many troubles is my father now besetting wretched me on
 every side. I'll go away from here, since I avail but little by my
 presence. For without my consent, I do not believe that they will bring
 up the child, especially as on that point my mother-in-law will second
 me. (Exit speedily.) 
 
 
 
 LACHES 
 
 to PAMPHILUS. Do you run away? What, and give me no
 distinct answer? To PHIDIPPUS. Does he seem to you to be
 in his senses? Let him alone. Phidippus, give me the child; I'll bring
 it up. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 By all means. No wonder if my wife has taken this amiss: women are
 resentful; they do not easily put up with such things. Hence that anger
 of hers, for she herself told me of it; I would not mention this to you
 in his presence, and at first I did not believe her; but now it is true
 beyond a doubt; for I see that his feelings are altogether averse to
 marriage. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 What am I to do, then, Phidippus? What advice do you give? 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 What are you to do? I am of opinion that first we ought to go to this
 mistress of his. Let us use entreaties with her; then let us rebuke her;
 and at last, let us very seriously threaten her, if she gives him any
 encouragement in future. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 I will do as you advise. Turning to an ATTEDANT. Ho,
 there, boy! run to the house of Bacchis here, our neighbor; desire her,
 in my name, to come hither. Exit ATTENDANT. And you, I
 further entreat, to give me your assistance in this affair. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Well, I have already said, and I now say again to the same effect,
 Laches, I wish this alliance between us to continue, if by any means it
 possibly may, which I trust will be the case. But should you
 like 
 me to be with you
 while you meet her? 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Why yes; but first go and get some one as a nurse for the child.
 (Exit PHIDIPPUS.)

Enter BACCHIS attended by her WOMEN. 
 
 BACCHIS 
 
 to her WOMEN. It is not for nothing that Laches now
 desires to speak with me; and, i' faith, I am not very far from mistaken
 in making a guess what it is he wants me for. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 
 to himself. I must take care that I don't, through anger,
 miss gaining, in this quarter what I otherwise might, and that I don't
 do any thing which hereafter it would have been better I had not done.
 I'll accost her. Accosts her. Bacchis, good-morrow to
 you! 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 Good-morrow to you, Laches! 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Troth, now, Bacchis, I suppose you somewhat wonder what can be my reason
 for sending the lad to fetch you out of doors. 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 Upon my faith, I am even in some anxiety as well, when I reflect what I
 am, lest the name of my calling should be to my prejudice; for my
 behavior I can easily defend. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 If you speak the truth, you will be in no danger, woman, from me, for I
 am now of that age that it is not meet for me to receive forgiveness for
 a fault; for that reason do I the more carefully attend to every
 particular, that I may not act with rashness; for if you now do, or
 intend to do, that which is proper for deserving women to do, it would
 be unjust for me, in my ignorance, to offer an injury to you, when
 undeserving of it. 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 On my word, great is the gratitude that I ought to feel toward you for
 such conduct; for he who, after committing an injury, would excuse
 himself, would profit me but little. But what is the matter? 
 
 
 LACHES 
 You admit my son, Pamphilus, to your house. 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 Ah! 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Just let me speak: before he was married to this woman, I tolerated your
 amour. Stay! I have not yet said to you what I intended. He has now got
 a wife: look out for another person more to be depended on, while you
 have time to deliberate; for neither will he be of this mind all his
 life, nor, i' faith, will you be always of your present age. 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 Who is it says this? 
 
 
 LACHES 
 His mother-in-law. 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 What! that I 
 
 
 LACHES 
 That you do: and she has taken away her daughter; and for that reason,
 has wished secretly to destroy the child that has been born. 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 Did I know any other means whereby I might be enabled to establish my
 credit with you, more solemn than an oath, I would, Laches, assure you
 of this, that I have kept Pamphilus at a distance 
 from me ever since he took a wife. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 You are very good. But, pray, do you know what I would prefer that you
 should do? 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 What? Tell me. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Go in-doors there pointing to the house of PHIDIPPUS to
 the women, and make the same promise, on oath, to them; satisfy their
 minds, and clear yourself from this charge. 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 I will do so; although, i' faith, if it had been any other woman of this
 calling, she would not have done so, I am quite sure; present herself
 before a married woman for such a purpose! But I do not wish your son to
 be suspected on an unfounded report, nor appear inconstant,
 undeservedly, to you, to whom he by no means ought; for he has deserved
 of me, that, so far as I am able, I should do him a service. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Your language has rendered me quite friendly and well disposed toward
 you; but not only did they think so--I too believed it. Now that I have
 found you quite different from what I had expected, take care that you
 still continue the same-make use of my friendship as you please; if
 otherwise--; but I will forbear, that you may not hear any thing unkind
 from me. But this one thing I recommend you make trial what sort of a
 friend I am, or what I can effect as such, rather than what as an enemy.

Enter PHIDIPPUS and a NURSE. 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 (to the NURSE.) Nothing at my house will I suffer you to be in want of;
 but whatever is requisite shall be supplied you in abundance. Still,
 when you are well fed and well drenched, do take care that the child has
 enough. The NURSE goes into his house. 
 
 
 
 LACHES 
 
 to BACCHIS. My son's father-in-law, I see, is coming; he
 is bringing a nurse for the child. Accosting him. 
 Phidippus, Bacchis swears most solemnly. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Is this she? 
 
 
 LACHES 
 It is. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Upon my faith, those women don't fear the Gods; and I don't think that
 the Gods care about them. 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 
 pointing to her ATTENDANTS. I will give you up my female
 servants; with my full permission, examine them with any tortures you
 please. The business at present is this: I must make his wife return
 home to Pamphilus; should I effect that, I shall not regret its being
 reported that I have been the only one to do what other courtesans avoid
 doing. 
 
 
 
 
 LACHES 
 We find, Phidippus, that our wives have been unjustly
 suspected 
 by us in this matter. Let us now
 try her still further; for if your wife discovers that she has given
 credence to a false charge, she will dismiss her resentment; but if my
 son is also angry, by reason of the circumstance that his wife has been
 brought to bed without his knowledge, that is a trifle: his anger on
 that account will speedily subside. Assuredly in this matter, there is
 nothing so bad as to be deserving of a separation. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 I sincerely wish it may be so. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Examine her; here she is; she herself will satisfy you. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 Why do you tell me these things? Is it because you have not already
 heard what my feelings are with regard to this matter, Laches? Do you
 only satisfy their minds. 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Troth now, Bacchis, I do entreat that what you have promised me you will
 do. 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 Would you wish me, then, to go in about this business? 
 
 
 LACHES 
 Go, and satisfy their minds, so as to make them believe it. 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 I'll go: although, upon my word, I am quite sure that my presence will
 be disagreeable to them, for a married woman is the enemy of a mistress,
 when she has been separated from her husband. 
 
 
 LACH. 
 But they will be your friends, when they know the reason of your
 coming. 
 
 
 PHIDIPPUS 
 And I promise that they shall be your friends, when they know the fact;
 for you will release them from their mistake, and yourself, at the same
 time, from suspicion. 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 Wretched me! I'm ashamed to meet Philumena. (To her ATTENDANTS.) Do you
 both follow me into the house. Goes into the house with PHIDIPPUS
 and her ATTENDANTS. 
 
 
 
 LACHES 
 
 to himself. What is there that I could more wish for,
 than what I see has happened to this woman? To gain favor without loss
 to myself, and to benefit myself at the same time. For if now it is the
 fact that she has really withdrawn from Pamphilus, she knows that by
 that step she has acquired honor and reputation: she returns the favor
 to him, and, by the same means, attaches us as friends to herself.
 Goes into the house.

Enter PARMENO, moving along with difficulty. 
 
 PARMENO 
 . to himself. Upon my faith, my master does assuredly
 think my labor of little value; to have sent me for nothing, where I
 have been sitting the whole day to no purpose, waiting at the citadel
 for Callidemides, his landlord at Myconos. And so, while sitting there
 to-day, like a fool, as each person came by, I accosted him:--"Young
 man, just tell me, pray, are you a Myconian" "I am not.." "But is your
 name Callidemides?" "No." "Have you any former guest here named
 Pamphilus?" All said, "No; and I don't believe that there is any such
 person." At last, i' faith, I was quite ashamed, and went away. But how
 is it I see Bacchis coming out of our neighbor's? What business can she
 have there? Enter BACCHIS, from the house of
 PHIDIPPUS. 
 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 Parmeno, you make your appearance opportunely; run with all
 speed' 
 to Pamphilus. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Why thither? 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 Say that I entreat him to come. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 To your house? 
 
 
 BACCH. NO; 
 to Philumena. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 What's the matter? 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 Nothing that concerns you; so cease to make inquiry. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Am I to say nothing else? 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 Yes; that Myrrhina has recognized that ring as her daughter's, which he
 formerly gave me. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 I understand-is that all? 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 That's all. He will be here directly he has heard this from you. But do
 you linger? 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Far from it, indeed; for I've not had the opportunity given me to-day;
 so much with running and walking about have I wasted the whole day.
 Goes into the house of LACHES. 
 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 What great joy have I caused for Pamphilus by my coming to-day! How many
 blessings have I brought him! and from how many sorrows have I rescued
 him! A son I save for him, when it was nearly perishing through the
 agency of these women and of himself: a wife, whom he thought that he
 must cast off forever, I restore to him: from the suspicion that he lay
 under with his father and Phidippus, I have cleared him. This ring, in
 fact, was the cause of these discoveries being made. For I remember,
 that about ten months ago, at an early hour of night, he came running
 home to my house, out of breath, without a companion, and surcharged
 with wine, 
 with this ring in
 his hand. I felt alarmed immediately: "My Pamphilus," I said, "prithee,
 my dear, why thus breathless, or where did you get that ring?-tell me!"
 He began to pretend that he was thinking of something else. When I saw
 that, I began to suspect I know not what, and to press him still more to
 tell me. The fellow confessed that he had ravished some female, he knew
 not whom, in the street; and said, that while she was struggling, he had
 taken that ring away from her. Myrrhina here recognized it just now,
 while I had it on my finger. She asked whence it came: I told her all
 the story. Hence the discovery has been made that it was Philumena
 ravished by him, and that this new-born child is his. I am overjoyed
 that this happiness hsa befallen him through my agency; although other
 courtesans would not have similar feelings; nor, indeed, is it to our
 interest that any lover should find pleasure in matrimony. But, i'
 faith, I never, for the sake of gain, will give my mind to base actions.
 So long as I had the opportunity, I found him to be kind, easy, and
 good-natured. This marriage has fallen out unluckily for me,--that I
 confess to be the fact. But, upon my word, I do think that I have done
 nothing for it to befall me deservedly. It is but reasonable to endure
 inconveniences from one from whom I have received so many benefits.

Enter PAMPHILUS and PARMENO, from the house of LACHES, on the other side
 of the stage. 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Once more, take care, will you, my dear Parmeno, that you have brought
 me a faithful and distinct account, so as not to allure me for a short
 time to indulge in these transient joys. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 I have taken care. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 For certain? 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 For certain. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 I am quite a God, if it is so! 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 You'll find it true. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Just stay, will you; I fear that I'm believing one thing, and you are
 telling another. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 I am staying. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 I think you said to this effect--that Myrrhina had discovered that
 Bacchis has her ring. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 It is the fact. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 The one I formerly gave to her; and she has desired you to tell me this:
 is such the fact? 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Such is so, I tell you. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Who is there happier than I, and, in fact, more full of joyousness? What
 am I to present you for these tidings? What?--what? I know not. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 But I know. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 What? 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Why, nothing; for neither in the tidings nor in myself do I know of
 there being any advantage to you. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 What! am I to suffer you, who have caused me, when dead, to be restored
 from the shades to life--to leave me unrewarded? Oh, you deem me too
 thankless! But look--I see Bacchis standing before the door; she's
 waiting for me, I suppose; I'll accost her. 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 Save you, Pamphilus! 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Oh Bacchis! Oh my Bacchis--my preserver! 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 It is a fortunate thing, and gives me great delight. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 By your actions, you give me reason to believe you, and so much do you
 retain your former charming qualities, that wherever you go, the meeting
 with you, your company, your conversation, always give pleasure. 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 And you, upon my word, possess your former manners and disposition; so
 much so that not a single man living is more engaging than you. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 
 laughing. Ha, ha, ha! do you tell me so? 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 You had reason, Pamphilus, for being so fond of your wife. For never
 before to-day did I set eyes upon her, so as to know her: she seems a
 very gentle person. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Tell the truth. 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 So may the Gods bless me, Pamphilus! 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Tell me, have you as yet told any of these matters to my father? 
 BACCH. Not a word. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Nor is there need, in fact; therefore keep it a secret: I don't wish it
 to be the case here as it is in the Comedies, 
 where every thing is known to every body. Here, those'
 who ought to know, know already; but those who ought not to know, shall
 neither hear of it nor know it. 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 Nay more, I will give you a proof why you may suppose that this may be
 the more easily concealed. Myrrhina has told Phidippus to this
 effect--that she has given credit to my oath, and that, in consequence,
 in her eyes you are exculpated. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Most excellent; and I trust that this matter will turn out according to
 our wishes. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Master, may I not be allowed to know from you what is the good that I
 have done to-day, or what it is you are talking about? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 You may not. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Still I suspect. "I restore him, when dead, from the shades
 below." 
 In what way? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 You don't know, Parmeno, how much you have benefited me to-day, and from
 what troubles you have extricated me. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Nay, but indeed I do know: and I did not do it without design. 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 I know that well enough ironically . 
 
 
 BACCHIS 
 Could Parmeno, from negligence, omit any thing that ought to be
 done? 
 
 
 PAMPHILUS 
 Follow me in, Parmeno. 
 
 
 PARMENO 
 Ill follow; for my part, I have done more good to-day, without knowing
 it, than ever I did, knowingly, in all my life. Coming
 forward. Grant us your applause.